If your school aged DC regularly stay overnight at their grandparents ...

[nappyaddict]

How often do they stay and for how many nights?

My son usually spends one night per week at a grandparent.

Dunno if it helps but we regularly host 4yo dnephew - anything up to 6 nights, 2 hours away from home. He loves it, it gives SIL some respite too (6yo dniece has autism) and we spoil him utterly rotten with trips out and attention!

That's in school holidays btw, he's in YR :)

DD1 stays with my mum about 2 nights a week. Sometimes Sunday/Monday nights, sometimes Friday/Saturday. She will probably go on a weeks holiday with her too, but DM refuses to take DD2 :(

PUrplePidgin Is that 6 nights a week in school holidays or 6 nights over the school holidays?

NoWittyName and FormerlyTitledUntidy how old/what year are your DC in? Also are you lone parents or do you live with a DH/DP?

FormerlyTitledUntidy Why does she refuse to take DD2? Is it because she thinks she is too young? If it's because she feels she can't manage the 2 of them together you should say DD1 isn't coming unless you are going to take DD2 as well at a later date. I won't have you treat them unfairly because it upsets DD2.

Sorry, six consecutive nights. Kind of like going on holiday (we live near the beach which helps)

Never. They are too young. Is this going to be a drip feed about how unreasonable yours are?

Ds 5 and dd almost 3 have been staying with gps for about a year regularly, during school hols. 3 or 4 night at a time usually 2 with one set of gps then 1 or 2 with the other. Over the Sumer they are going away for a week and then 5 days, which will be longest so far.

One night roughly every 6 weeks I think but MIL also has them one day a week before and after school (until about 5.30 pm)
I am sure MIL would have them to stay overnight more often if we asked - they are her only grandchildren, she loves having them and dc love staying with her.

I lived at home until dd1 was 4.5 so she is very close to my mum. Dd2 isnt two yet so is a bit small but my mum also doesnt have the same closeness (catch 22 really, she never will if they don't spend time together). Dd2 is starting to notice so something will have to change, either the frequency dd1 stays or that dd2 goes too.

What about you?

My Ds aged 8 stays with my Dad 1 night a month so I can have a night out, and has done since he was about 18 months old.

Just to clarify, i think most dc at 4 would be too young to be away for that length of time. Dn is a very independent personality, and SIL likes him to have the 1:1 time due to dniece's needs. We're very clear with him that he can go home anytime he wants to. He also sometimes asks to stay over at his gran's, about 10 minutes from where he lives with SIL, for fun!

It does depend on the individual :)

DD1 has stayed with my parents for over a week at a time on a number of occasions (school holidays combined with us living abroad - so I'd fly over for weekend, leave DD there and come back a week later). She has also stayed with them for a month during last summer as we were waiting for her sister to make an appearance. But then they are very very close (we lived with my parents until DD was 6 months old, and just up the road until she was 18 months old.

We're much too far away now and I know DD misses them terribly. She's having her first overnight with MIL this weekend though, which is lovely but has me v nervous (MIL isn't as hands on or as patient as my folks and she doesn't have the same relationship with DD - yet)

At least once a week, usually on a Friday night, it's 'their' night together and has been since she was young.

i think its down to what the grandparents want and can cope with no one needs to be counting nights.

FormerlyTitledUntidy Similar situation. Moved out when DS was 5.5 and Mum still has DS 3 nights a week due to mine and DP's working hours. I am looking for a new job and when I change my hours I am looking to cut down the amount of nights DS spends at his Grandparents. Mum is not happy so trying to see what the "norm" is.

My DC (8&6) stay with my parents maybe once every couple of months. Maybe a couple of consecutive nights in the summer hols. My mum and dad are not that keen to have them to stay to be honest.

One night a week with mum and one a week with mil as I work then. Dont like it though. Id much rather it was me tucking them in and reading bedtime stories.

When my Dad was alive they'd stay 1 night every other weekend. When they were younger they continued this after he died but stayed with my sis. Now they are older it's once a month ish for special film nights wwe etc. they are now 10 n 14

Never.

Never

On one occasion when both DH and I had to be away Dad stayed the night at ours. He lives just across the road, is always happy to help but he is grandpa not parent!

About one Saturday night every 2 months, DCs aged 6 and 8, since they were about 2 and 4. Sometimes two nights in the school holidays. My parents would quite happily have them more, but DS resists a bit now and I don't want to force the issue.

My DS1 (age 8) sleeps over at my Mum's house every other Friday and has done for the last 3 years, prior to that she had him on average about once a month from him being just a couple of months old - she loves having him and he loves going and they are very close (by her own admission he is her favourite grandchild).

DS2 (age 3.5) has only stayed with my Mum couple of times in his entire life as he doesn't settle well when there, he will wake in the night and then still gets up early and can be a bit of a handful / livewire at times and so she finds him too much like hard work and leaves her shattered (though she does take him out during the day once a week). He has stayed at my sister's a couple of times but this has only been because he has fallen asleep on the rare occasion that she's minded him and so she's said to leave him rather than disturb him.

My parents - dd1&2 spent a few days there without us when they were about 9 and 7, dd3 and ds have never stayed there without us. My parents live 200 miles away though.

PIL - have had them all for occasional sleepovers. Last time it was just dd3 and ds as the older two dds were at guide camp. We're talking maybe twice a year though. PIL live 5 mins up the road and we see them at least weekly when they're not on holiday.

My kids (age 2, 4 and 6) have only slept over at their grandparents' without me once, for one night. My parents usually come here for the day instead.