shut up!

[PooPooInMyToes]

Im wondering how other people feel about saying this to their children. I always thought it was really bad and actually worse then swearing but Im not sure others agree.

I never wanted to say that to my children and didn't for a very long time. I even managed to only let it slip out the once when they were babies and one of them was a massive screamer!

Lately though it keeps slipping out. I don't like it!

I don't think I say 'shut up' but I definitely use phrases like 'I'm not listening', 'be quiet', 'I'm not discussing', 'that's enough'.... delivered as sternly as required. If you're being hectored by anyone, not just children, you need something succinct that shuts them up.

Personally i don't like it and don't say it, to anyone, as it sounds rude. My DH has said it in jest to our DS, 16 months, and i've told him not to because i want to encourage him to talk. I think there are other ways of saying it that aren't as rude. My view is don't say it unless you want your LO to one day say it to you!

Cog! You always answer my posts! you must think Im neurotic!

Yes i say Enough! And Be quiet but the shut up keeps sneaking in there.

I actually dislike it even more then swearing. I guess i find it disrespectful whereas swearing is just a naughty word. Assuming that your not calling your child a cunt or anything!

Oh god I say it often. It gets to a point where they just need to, well SHUT THE HELL UP! I wish i didn't lose my temper but then i think its not as if anyone isn't going to say it to them and in the end, Shut up is exactly what is needed. No use beating around the bush.

I say it. DS tells me it's rude. Oh well.

I have said it more times than I can count. I wish I never said it. But I have my limits and DD pushes me to them frequently with her incessant talking. I do also ask her politely but firmly to stop talking but sometimes I just say shut up.

I say it all the time

Hmmm... It is worse than swearing, but only because I've never sworn at or about the kids (in their hearing!) whereas 'shut up' - the few times its slipped out - is absolutely aimed at them.

I follow this protocol: apologise for saying it, reiterate that it's not something a person should say, and then tell them in a more polite and gentle way to shut the hell up.

I do say it politely, not shouting, and it does the trick.

I have said it a few times when 'be quiet' , 'I'm not listening anymore', 'go away' , 'your making mummys ears hurt' etc don't work!

It doesn't work :(

I do think its rude!

I never ever say it to my kids, and I never say it to DH either, and he never says it to me. I agree that it is worse than swearing, as I have been known to say "bloody hell!" in front of my kids before.

I have a bug bear about Shut Up, it's SO rude, and sharp and confrontational. No-one is allowed to say it in this house. My sisters and I said it to each other all the time when we were growing up and my mum hated it.

I didn't even think about it tbh, until I did teacher training about 10 years ago and we were told never to tell a student to shut up.

It does mean that I'm careful not to say it to the dcs, or anyone, come to think of it.

I wouldn't tell anyone else to shut up, so I wouldn't tell my Dc to either. There are lots of other phrases to use which will have the same effect. I used to say "I've heard enough now. Please be quiet"

I would also worry that a child copying "shut up" from a parent, would use it in school, where they would almost certainly be told off.

Astronaut, have you ever said it to a student?

Not to an individual, but I think I've done the whole: "You all need to shut. up." Said quit slowly when I'm close to losing my temper. Kids know that 'shut up' isn't teally allowed and they do get upset, "Miss, Mr x told y to shut up. Is that out of order?" If I get the point where an individual would warrant it, the kid would be sent out.

I tend to go most often with: "Right, thank you." or "THat's enough!" or "We all need to stop talking now." or even "Let's have a bit of hush." WITH some classes you can do fingers on lips in a jokey way.

Do you teach primary children? I teach secondary and I have said it

High school too. THey know their rights!

Re school, would be lovely to do as Henry Rollins: "SHut the fuck up and sit the fuck down!"

I'm sure that would get their attention Astronaut

I don't say it to my DCs, in fact I wouldn't say it to anyone. I would also get very annoyed if anyone said it to me.
I also don't swear at any one. If I'm getting frustrated, I swear to myself; if necessary, I'll go into the bathroom for a quick swear to calm down.
I am, however, very shouty with my DC and wish I could keep calm. They do seem to take it in turns to wind me up sometimes though

I say it. I hate it. It is rude and disrespectful. I am trying to use, "Sshshshsh," or "Hush up now" but habits are pretty tricky.

I think it conveys a deep disrespect that can only serve to squash someone's confidence and self esteem if delivered regularly - its really saying - "I have no interest in what you have to say and it has little value to me". I am a teacher too. I would imagine that saying this regularly to a child will gain the required result, PERMENATLY, as at some point the child will just give up trying to communicate with you all together in a meaningful way. As adults I am sure we can come up with more respectful ways of diverting our kids.

I don't like to say shut up to any body. I think that I might have said it once or twice to my ds when really wound up. I feel terrible afterwards and hate myself for it. My 4yo ds has started to say to me "There's no need to shout Mummy." and "Are you sorry that you shouted at me?" He's more mature than I am.

I don't say it to my DC but I do often find myself saying it in their earshot when trying to get my dogs to stop their incessant barking when they feel they are not getting their due attention (usually when we first come in after being out for a while).

I hate it but it's usually a last resort after "Dogs, be quiet!!", "Dogs, enough!!", "Dogs stop it!!" doesn't quite cut it & I end up losing it . Unfortunately I have now heard my DD1 (4yo) say it, although so far, only to the dogs when copying me. I have told her its not a nice thing to say & Mummy is very naughty for saying it. I just hope she doesn't take it to school with her .

Oh - and the other S word I hate (and won't have said in the house) is stupid