Some common flash points here, so as a wiser/wizened mum of school age kids, a few things I learned.
For those with babies, my best tips: a sling, put baby in and you can then carry on with a lot of household jobs. In the car for rearward facing babies - can't remember what it's called, but I had a thing with four pockets which ties on to the seat they are facing. You slot pictures into the pockets and you have a supply of about 30 so you can keep changing them. The babies (worked for all three) seemed to get mesmerised by looking at the black and white ones, certainly stopped a lot of screaming in the car.
For toddlers, don't stress about the meal thing, it will pass. If they will only eat a few things, just give them those, after a while I promise they will agree to try other things. My breakthrough came when I understood they actually experienced fear at the thought of having to eat things that for some reason worried them. My son who at two would only eat "circle" ham, raisins, breadsticks, and cheese triangles now wolfs down vast quantities of curry, greens etc!
Bedtime - another breakthrough for me was discovering that I felt so tired and ratty because I was hungry (I normally feed kids about 5 and wait to eat with dh at 8). Sometimes now I eat with them instead, or have a snack with them, and find I am much more able to be patient at bedtime.
Or the old fashioned way - my Mum starts everything much earlier whenever she had the kids - little ones put in their PJs straight after tea, veg peeled by 4pm etc - never adopted this myself, but it might work for some.