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If you are not Christian.How do you deal with christmas and your kids?Your thaughts please.

36 replies

lailahappy · 18/12/2011 16:54

Any ideas are welcome.

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hocuspontas · 18/12/2011 16:57

Nothing religious in this house just a lovely time for giving and receiving gifts with family and friends.

Bunbaker · 18/12/2011 17:03

BIL is an atheist and extremely anti religion. He is also very greedy and loves Christmas and Easter, but doesn't give a toss about the meanings behind them.

oathkeeper · 18/12/2011 17:03

Christmas isn't necessarily a christian celebration, its a pagan one i think.

it is said that we celebrate on the 25th dec as that is the day that Jesus was born. Yet there are many papers that dispute this.

There is very little about modern Christmas celebration that is Religious.

IS there a specific aspect that you are thinking of?

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Ragwort · 18/12/2011 17:07

There is very little about modern Christmas celebration that is Religious - really ? Xmas Hmm - what about Church services, carol singing, Nativity plays etc etc - I would say (thankfully) that most of the celebrating is religious.

Bunbaker · 18/12/2011 17:10

It depends on your point of view. Some people celebrate the pagan aspect - Yule, some people celebrate the Christian aspect and some people, like BIL, celebrate the commercial/greed aspect.

LadyBeckenham · 18/12/2011 17:11

Ragwort maybe the way you celebrate it, but not everyone!

We ceelebrate by having a tree, presents, visiting family and a special meal with crackers, nice food etc.

I am an athiest, it would never occur to me or any of my family (who are not athiests, but not religious christians, more cultural christians if you like) to go to church, sig carols or go to nativity plays Xmas Confused

Cybbo · 18/12/2011 17:15

I dont 'deal' with Christmas. I enjoy it

PeggyCarter · 18/12/2011 17:16

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oathkeeper · 18/12/2011 17:18

Ragwort - most schools have rather alternative nativity plays nowadays. My DD had "humph the camel" this year. the larger portion of the community don't attend church services or carol concerts.

For most christmas is about getting together with those we love most and sharing. Be that gifts or food or merely time.

I can't see what is "greedy" about being non religious and yet enjoying christmas bunbaker

andaPontyinaPearTreeeeee · 18/12/2011 17:20

I'm an atheist so Christmas is about having time together and enjoying giving presents, and all the festive stuff like making decorations, singing carols around the piano etc.

I would like it to be a bit more... Spiritual, though. I don't believe and never will (have tried!) but I don't want to be so atheist that it makes me DCs feel uncomfortable with religion or be intolerant of it. I want them to know a lot about it because whether they are religious or not it is a massively important part of our culture. We have bible stories at home, and DD has mentioned baby Jesus (she is 4 and I guess they have talked about the nativity at school) so I'd like to develop it more. DH will be hard to convince though as he is more atheist than me IYSWIM!

I am worried about being a hypocrite though. I really enjoy going to church, even though I don't believe in God. Is that weird? Confused

oathkeeper · 18/12/2011 17:23

I start every answer to a question about religion with "some people believe...."
that way they are getting the answer they need but without you confirming its truth or commiting yourself to any religion.

MaeMobley · 18/12/2011 17:24

We are Jewish and it is hard. This year Chanukah coincides with Xmas so we do emphasise the present giving.

Bunbaker · 18/12/2011 17:28

"I can't see what is "greedy" about being non religious and yet enjoying christmas bunbaker"

BIL is a greedy person. He only enjoys Christmas because he gets presents and lots to eat. He isn't bothered about getting together with family. I think you can tell that he isn't my favourite person.

PeggyCarter · 18/12/2011 17:28

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butterflyexperience · 18/12/2011 20:03

Tree, decorations, give out cards and presents to friends, visit father christmasd, listen to christmas songs, eat christams type food.=, join in nativity plays at schools....

lailahappy · 18/12/2011 21:36

Thanks to everyone.Oathkeeper i liked the idea of starting each answer to a question with " some people believe on..."

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culturemulcher · 18/12/2011 21:42

laila that's what I say to the DC and it seems to work. Grin

ivykaty44 · 18/12/2011 21:44

the winter is long, with dark nights and we celebrate the winter festivle/Christmas by name as that it what it is mostly called.

We put a tree in the sitting room and have lights around the house and a tinsle wreath on the door, all things cheerful and bright to brighten up the long winter nights.

We have present swapping with family and friends that wish to join us on the 25th and a big dinner followed by games, then for a week or so we eat cold meat and meet other friends and have a few drinks, play a lot of games and chat.

Then on the 6th night we celebrate a new year, this used to be 25th March but it got moved in 1752 and so now is part and parcel of the celebrations.

littleducks · 18/12/2011 21:48

We just dont do it, dd is in the nativity/carol thing at school, we dont give out cards or have presents/decoration/tree. Sometimes have a roast dinner, once even turkey as all the ingredients are in the shops, I am really excited about the gruffallo's child bring on TV, had expected that last year not just a repeat if the gruffallo

lailahappy · 18/12/2011 23:02

What about Santa how do you explain it to kids? does he exist or not?for them is so magical.but what about you? for those who dont celebrate what would you say to them?

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LadyBeckenham · 19/12/2011 08:49

We don't do Father Christmas either - I never did as a child, I don't see the need.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 19/12/2011 09:10

We're not a religious household so we do the traditional Yuletide things of food, presents, seasonal songs and decorations. I have a nice book all about where the old traditions came from.... like the 'spirit' of the woodland deserting the deciduous trees and residing in evergreens and mistletoe.... how mince pies really used to contain mince.... and we often read some of that. Father Christmas is a magical figure that brings stockings full of gifts. Any suspicious children are reassured that believing in FC is optional, but non-believers have to weigh up the 'no stocking' risk :)

MudAndGlitter · 19/12/2011 09:11

DSD asked about the baby Jesus the other day and I told her a long time ago there was a baby born in a stable and now we celebrate Xmas. She's 4 so thankfully hasn't asked me to elaborate or i would be a bit stuck!

PeggyCarter · 19/12/2011 09:18

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toddlerama · 19/12/2011 09:20

We're Christians and we struggle with Christmas! It's often so divorced from the biblical account it can be difficult to take part in even the church events without the kids getting confused between the gospel accounts and the cartoons. I would prefer a winter festival I think! And then just teach the DCs the biblical accounts of Jesus' birth as a separate thing (particularly as it was probably in the spring....). But we still enjoy it and it's a good opportunity to connect with our community in a way that isn't usually natural - eg card and gifts for neighbours - the rest of the year we just drive past each other in the mornings! I certainly don't feel any "ownership" over christmas as a festival as a christian. I think we all know it's high-jacked don't we???

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