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Original poster

to ask If I my reaction to this is normal?

83 replies

TraditionalSemi · 08/07/2011 21:36

I'm a namechanger, and have changed some identifying details but the gist of it remains the same.

Smile

My 7 year old neice has started doing sleepovers at her best friend's house, probably 2 to 3 a month.

The family are lovely and well known to me and my family, for over 8 years.

I was speaking to the mom last week and she mentioned how comfortable Maisie (say) is at her house.

To the extent that Maisie and Lola (the best friend) are often found in bed with Lola's mummy and daddy in the night.

The parents sleeep naked.

I was a bit taken aback by this and I am now worried that my reaction is misplaced.

How would you feel?

(Please note, I do not feel that Maisie is in any danger at all, but am surprised at the openness of this family)

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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Senatrice · 08/07/2011 23:32

HelloKlitty If you have such concerns, why not just report the thread to MNHQ?

Or do you want to glory of being a troll hunter? Which in this case is both sadly misguided and derailing a legitimate thread where an OP is asking for help.

The only basis you have for your scepticism is that the OP hasn't returned.

Well, fuck me. Person can't get right back on the internet to respond to accusations of trolling.

Stop the presses.

Hmm

And by the way. I know who the OP is. She is not trolling. She has a genuine question and people like you are not helping the situation.

Original poster
TraditionalSemi · 08/07/2011 23:32

And, fwiw, I have now discovered it's not a WiFi problem, but have had to restart my laptop 4 times to post that above message as it keeps freezing.

I do apologize.

(Did you sense the sarcasm in that?)

OP posts:
CarnivalBizarre · 08/07/2011 23:37

TraditionalSemi does your sister know about the sleeping arrangements? or is this just what your niece has disclosed to you?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

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HelloKlitty · 08/07/2011 23:39

I have reported it senatrice I'm sure MN will be able to tell by the poters pevious threads whether it's "real" or not.

LRDTheFeministNutcase · 08/07/2011 23:40

Woah, back off TS ... you don't need to 'compose yourself' really!

You may not know, but what HK is getting at is that there are, sadly, some sick people who do troll by posting threads about children and nakedness because they enjoy the speculation. It's not nice and the usual way to deal with it is quietly reporting threads (which is better for the OP as s/he won't even know if there's been a report unless HQ have good reason to think there's something untoward). But you don't need to make grand statements about leaving the forum do you?

HelloKlitty · 08/07/2011 23:41

Oh....and I wasn't aware of any glory attached to MN. In any shape. If I see something which makes me suspicious I will always say so....it's called user moderation. Not troll hunting.

AgentZigzag · 08/07/2011 23:41

It was the neices, mates mum who said to the OP I think carnival, the person whose house they're sleeping at?

Although I'm not sure how the OP knows the couple sleep naked.

Original poster
TraditionalSemi · 08/07/2011 23:45

You know LRD, you're probably right - I'm being a wuss.

But in all my time on MN, this is the first time I've had any negativity directed towards me and I think I have been reactionary, and I apologise.

I really was just seeking help with my thought process and I apologise if it could be misconstrued as trolling.

OP posts:
Senatrice · 08/07/2011 23:45

I really hope MNHQ will confirm this is a genuine poster to you Helle.

That same genuine poster has just been mesaging me saying she might need to take a break from MN due to this thread. She has been crying over your response.

MNHQ - I'm reporting myself here. Can you please vindicate me and tell Hello this isn't a pervy troll, rather a poster who needed help but has now been reduced to tears and is nearly about to dereg?

Thanks Hmm

CarnivalBizarre · 08/07/2011 23:46

AgentZigzag thankyou for putting me right - have had a night of head fuckery Grin

HelloKlitty · 08/07/2011 23:46

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

Original poster
TraditionalSemi · 08/07/2011 23:46

Carnival, no, it was the friend's mummy who told me about this.

I haven't told my sister as have been comtemplating for a while - I think now I shall just mention it, and let her make some decisions.

OP posts:
HelloKlitty · 08/07/2011 23:48

Oh and you don't need to adress MNHQ on my behalf thanks Senatrice...I think I can continue my own discourse.

Senatrice · 08/07/2011 23:49

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AgentZigzag · 08/07/2011 23:49

Honestly OP, don't dereg or get upset by HelloKlitty.

I can kind of see what she's saying and why, MN does attract some 'strange' people, just as certain kind of jobs do, maybe HK has personal reasons for giving a warning?

Not saying you have HK, but it's always good to remember it's a public forum that attracts from far and wide.

TimeWasting · 08/07/2011 23:49

If they co-slept with their daughter when she was little, and she has continued to get into bed with them regularly, then that in itself will be normal for them. A family bed is just that, a place for family to sleep.

If the daughter then suggested to her friend that they get in when Mum and Dad were asleep and the parents later realise, 'oh, Maisie's here too, oh well, nothing bad happened, never mind' I can see how they might be cool with it.

It's not acceptable of course, but I don't think there's necessarily anything suspicious about it.

HelloKlitty · 08/07/2011 23:50

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CarnivalBizarre · 08/07/2011 23:50

eh! isn't that what I said? The OPs sisters mates mum - arrrrgh I need to sleep more - oh fuck it - folk should not sleep nekkid with other peoples kids in the bed

peeling your good self off somebody elses sweaty arse is not good - even worse if you are a minor

Senatrice · 08/07/2011 23:51

Please. Don't pull your patronising crap posts on me.

I wasn't addressing MNHQ on your behalf. I was reporting myself, so that maybe they saw it quicker?

Continue with your discourse.

As you were.

AgentZigzag · 08/07/2011 23:51

I had to read it a few times to get the specifics carnival, it was like an IQ test Grin

I would say to your sister OP, if I were her I'd want to know.

She might be totally OK with it, but that's for her to decide I would say.

HelloKlitty · 08/07/2011 23:52

As you were too Senatrice.

MNHQ
HelenMumsnet · 08/07/2011 23:56

Hello. Please can we remind you that both accusations of trollery and personal attacks are against our Talk Guidelines.

HelloKlitty - we have responded to your mails.

OP, perhaps you'd like us to move your thread out of AIBU to Parenting?

Gooseberrybushes · 08/07/2011 23:57

folk should not sleep nekkid with other peoples kids in the bed

well YES who can deny it

WhoremoaneeGrainger · 08/07/2011 23:57

FWIW DH and i sleep naked all the time, and DD gets in for a "cuggle" in the mornings sometimes, but when her friends or our family stay over its PJ's all the way for us!!!!

DD and her "Sis" (best friend) did both climb in with me the last time she stayed over, but that was to watch kids TV at half 8 in the morning...I slept through most of it.

CarnivalBizarre · 09/07/2011 00:02

Timewasting I think I said the same thing earlier and would probably make more sense than a couple of pervs inviting a child into their bedroom

Still inappropriate though and the OP has a right to mention it to her sister just to be on the safe side