My DD doesn't love me ...

[whattodoo]

My DD (3yrs) is constantly rejecting me lately.

She's always been a daddy's girl, but lately its far more noticeable.
The other day, she pushed me a way and said "I don't like you" and then snuggled up to Dad and said "Like you".
Yesterday, I picked her up from nursery (DP usually does this) and when I entered the building I heard her key worker tell her that Mummy was here. I then heard (from about 100 yards away, no exageration) DD shouting "No! Daddy!" repeatedly. I poked my head around her room door and when she saw me she burst into tears and started screaming. All of this was in front of other children, parents and staff. I was so upset.
I'm aware that she probably doesn't know the full meaning of 'like', but it hurts so much.

I work 3 days, spend the rest of the week with her. Weekends are fun filled fests with her, me and DP. I play with her, read her books etc etc.
I do most of the disciplining and take responsiblity for moving her development forward (in a natural way, not pushy!). So mine is probably the only stern voice she hears.
I don't honestly feel as though I've ever properly bonded with her. I felt no rush of love when she popped out, I couldn't breast feed for more than 2 weeks. etc etc.
I can't bear this rejection from her, although I know she doesn't mean it. But I want to nip it in the bud before it becomes an issue between us.
Any ideas?
I'm so sad, humiliated, rejected, inadequate, bad mum ..........

Although seeing Again's post, maybe there was something to the 'complex' theory, whether Oedipus or Electra...

I'm quite surprised other posters wouldn't let the child know that wasn't a nice thing to say. If one child hits another child at school they are told off and told it makes the other child sad. Ditto if a child calls another a "poo poo head who smells of poo" etc. I think the same principle applies.

I would just object to the idea that a child has to take care of a parent's feelings. I think it's fine to say 'Nobody can talk to their mother rudely like that', but to say 'You've made mum sad' takes the conversation in a manipulative direction.

Empathy is important when it comes to other people all the same, but in the home, with parents, I would emphasise respect, and be patient waiting for it. A child needs to have confidence that her parents can handle anything she throws at them, emotionally. I think it might be quite scary for a child to think she had made a parent sad, because it would make her thoughtless words seem far more significant than they really were (because a parent knows the child loves them) and also because a parent needs to be as solid and strong as a brick wall for a young child. A small child needs to feel small (in a good way) and needs to know that the parent is big and capable.

No, I see what you mean now. Thanks for explaining.