If money was no object would you still work and send your child to nursery?

[mollysmum82]

And if so, when?

The reason I ask is I'm a SAHM at the moment but have just received a really exciting job offer. Of course money is an object really - when I first gave up work to look after DD we struggled for a few months, having to use credit cards and the little savings we had to tie us over. But we have made some cut backs now and are steady (although any extra money would always be handy!)

I really loved my job and had always intended on going back part time. But when it came to it and DD turned 9 months old I just couldn't do it. I worked a 40 minute drive away and couldn't handle the thought of her being in a nursery and me being that far away. I realise how lucky I was to have had the choice and I'm certainly not judging anyone who did return to work, it just wasn't for me at the time. But my daughter is now approaching 2 and I wonder if it might be good for her to have some time at nursery? I've been offered a job of three half-days a week, term time only as it is a school. The nursery is attached to the same school. For me it is perfect as it is the best parts of the job I already loved. But I just need to decide if its right for my daughter. I presumed I would return when she was in preschool at the age of 4, so this had given me a lot to think about.

So I guess I just wanted your opinions on if you think nursery benefits toddlers/young children and if so from what age? Like I say we could survive money-wise if I didn't do this so I want to make sure its right for DD - I'd feel too guilty and selfish just doing it for me!

The other aspect is DH has been worrying a lot lately about our local schools. This job would guarantee a place for our daughter in an excellent prep school with heavily discounted fees - I guess that's a whole other thread!

I personally believe that a good nursery does benefit the majority of young children, yes.

And it sounds like you already love the job. I would really try to go for it.

If money was no object I'd have a nanny or two but neither my DH or I would be working .

I'm a sahm and currently put my DCs (both just turned 2) in a creche once or twice a week while I go to the gym. I do this mainly because they love it (otherwise I'd go in the evenings or mornings while my DH is at home). They aren't really capable of making friends yet and interaction with other kids is very hit and miss, but they love being around other children and they love the different environment at the creche. Most studies indicate very little difference between nursery/nanny/sahm care in the way of long term effects on children, so long as whatever care is high quality. But I definitely see the advantages from 2 onwards of them having more interaction with other kids (and if you're a sahm you can arrange this too - nurseries would work but they aren't the only solution).

If you'd love the job and it will add to rather than take from your family's security it could be a good move.

I would do it. Absolutely. I had to go back to work when DD was younger but she started going to playgroup 3 mornings a week at 2 and 3 months and absolutely loved every minute of it. It set her up really well for pre-school as well as she is the youngest in her year.

I've worked part time since dd was a year old and have always wished I was at home with her. However, I enjoyed my job and she benefits from nursery. Now the job has changed and is shitty, I would leave it in a heartbeat. I would send dd to preschool but not the daycare nursery she currently also goes to.

I've worked part time since dd was a year old and have always wished I was at home with her. However, I enjoyed my job and she benefits from nursery. Now the job has changed and is shitty, I would leave it in a heartbeat. I would send dd to preschool but not the daycare nursery she currently also goes to.

If money was no object I would be at home with my DCs.

Kids do well running in packs (not babies, toddlers and above).
The benefit to you of getting your hand in back at a job now will really become clear when your dd is in primary.

Oh crumbs, posted before editing. "Not tiny babies."

Absolutely. I love my job, hate being a SAHM and so I would definitely continue to work even if we would be comfortable without my salary.

I know some people don't like to work and far prefer to be home with their children, and fair play to them.

However, I think that people who would rather be at work, and have a good, satisfying career but give it up 'for their children' are crazy! As far as I'm concerned, everyone in my family has equal rights to happiness and fulfillment, not just the children.

I also think that a pre-school/nursery envirnment is good for children's social development. My two really enjoy/ed it, so everyone was happy.

It seems that you have been given an amazing opportunity, and if I were you I'd grab it with both hands and not let go!

Go for it!
Sounds like a great balanced situation for everyone. What many of us would hope to achieve.
Good luck

Three half days term-time only in a job you'll love, and a guaranteed school place.
Sounds amazing - I would go for it like a shot!

Yes children do benefit enormously form nursery and I think 2 for me is the perfect age to start. if money was no object I would still send them (probably 3 days a week) for the social and educational benefits.

The set up you've been offered sounds ideal.

I agree with musicmaiden, three half days term-time only in a job you'll love sounds ideal. I currently work 4 days in a job I dislike and if money was no object I'd hand my notice in tomorrow but even then I'd love to work 2 days a week and have DD in nursery. She loves her little friends there and does different activities to the ones I do with her.

Money is no object for me and I still send my kids to preschool for a few sessions a week because I am with them seven days all day and I need some time when I'm not a mummy too.

I am a sahm and put Ds in at 14 months for 2 mornings a week. It's done him the world of good! He is now 21 months and loves it! So much so that he runs away from me when I go pick him up

i would, but i'd do fewer hours and choose something a bit more fulfilling if less well paid

Well if money was no object, I would be off round the world in a super-yacht, with my DCs and a bevvy of nannies in tow !

But in your situation, I would take that job like a shot!

than what i do at teh moment i mean (full time, boring job)

If money was no object I would hire a truckload of nannies.

Well I don't work and send my 2 year old to creche 3 days a week. I'm very much a reluctant stay a home parent and would love to go back to work. My son loves it, I love too as it gives me some head space and a chance to do some things around the house.

Child happy-:)
mother happy :o

everybody is happy!!!!

Yes I would probably. I wouldn't like to take care of the DCs by myself everyday. I need a break.

I'd work part time and have the best of both worlds. I'm going to miss my DS so much when i go back to work full time, but i couldn't contemplate giving up work totally. I need something to focus my brain on other than everything baby and i also think children benefit from some time away from their parents socialising with other people and children.

annie if you love your job and would hate to be at home with kids although you could afford it - what exactly appealed to you about having kids then?

I just find that particualr attitude very hard to comprehend.

I loved my job but gave it up to be a SAHM (because im lucky to afford it also). I made the decision that if I was to have kids I would definitely not work full time and if I did consider part time, my mum agreed she would watch them. I just jacked it in after a few months of my mum reporting back his progress and feeling like I was already missing too much.

I think kids under 2 in nursery WHO DO NOT NEED TO BE THERE is a sad situation and sums up how Britain is the least family orientated country.

However OP, your situation sounds perfect. Your DD is now 2, it's part time, loads of hols and right next door. Hard to resist that situation. Good luck.

Quickchat - perhaps she thought children were individuals who could be guided to adulthood in man different ways and that, like many fathers, she would provide a loving and rich environment without spending virtually every minute of her life in their physical presence. Many cultures that are profoundly child oriented share childcare, it's the commercial and institutional nature of nurseries that makes them different from solutions that have worked in some other cultures.

I'm a sahm with DS (2.3) and it was always intended that I would look for a part time job when he started school (unless I have another DC by then).

The job you've described sounds perfect for your circumstances. Nursery attached, guaranteed place in good school, term time only etc and to be honest, if I came across a job like that and found myself being offered it I would grab the opportunity even if it meant DS starting nursery before I had intended. Jobs like that don't come up very often and when they do they tend to be jobs for life (if that's what you want). There's not many other jobs where you are guaranteed the school holidays off.

Even though I'm sahm my DS goes to playgroup 2 mornings a week and absolutely loves it. It gives him opportunity to get used to mixing with other kids and being away from me. He gets so excited about going and then loves coming home and telling me what he's been doing. However, I wouldn't have sent him before he was 2 (just my personal choice, I've no opinion on anyone else doing different).

With regards to the job, if money really is no object and you enjoy being at home, don't take it. If money is no object now but could be in the nearish future, take it. Either way it should not do your DD any harm to spend some time without you so sahm or part-time working mum DD will more than likely enjoy going to a nursery of some kind.