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Original poster

would you leave your baby in a locked car?

213 replies

Friendlygirl · 11/10/2005 10:47

have left my baby sleeping in my locked car while I dashed into the supermarket to buy a couple of things. Would any of you do that? Is it even l;egal? It worried me but I would rather do that than wake them up and sometimes I just have to get sometyhing from the shop for tea.

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alibag · 13/10/2005 10:32

When I left ds2 in the car, asleep in his baby seat, to pick up ds1 from nursery door(20 feet away, in full view), the nursery staff told me off! I would not leave them outside shops personally, but for me, outside the nursery seemed fine. Anyway, I didn't do it again. I have more fear of others' opinions or someone calling the police/s.s. on me, than anything actually happening to my children in this situation.

TracyK · 13/10/2005 10:36

I leave ds in the car at a petrol station - but wouldn't go into a supermarket and leave him.
I think about each individual situation and decide whether to leave him or not. eg - outside the PO to collect a parcel is a no no as it is a very busy road and another car could quite easily hit mine. In my drive is fine as he is just outside the window and well far back from the road.

ladbrokegrove · 13/10/2005 10:54

I don't drive but have left dd2 asleep in cot to take dd1 to nursery across the road from our house. Should point out that this was at a time when she would fall asleep around 12, nursery was at 1, but there was no way on this earth she would wake up before 2. Always felt nervous about doing it (what if she woke up scared?) but, y'know, you weigh up your options and this was my choice at the time. Dh always hated it but he wasn't here to help. I was delighted when she started sleeping later so I didn't have to leave her. Should also point out that I couldn't put her to sleep in the pram and take her with us as I live 3 flights up in a flat with no lift, so pram stays at bottom of stairs (where I wouldn't leave her cos you never know who's coming in and out!)

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Joanie · 13/10/2005 10:56

Gosh, what a suspicious lot you are - or maybe i'm naive. I always pay at pump and even if didn't wouldn't think twice about leaving dd (4) & ds (21/2) in car - far too dangerous on forecourt. But the idea of them being kidnapped would never occur to me.

I did leave dd (then 3) and ds (then 2)in car when I popped into tescos to buy 2 items, cos it was easier for me tbh. Cos would've taken ages to put ds in special trolley and try to stop dd from running off, all to be in the shop 2 mins.

But when I got back (not long) dd (who had been fine when I left) was bawling her eyes out saying 'you left me' Never did that again! (Make sure I leave them at home!)........

No, not alone of course!

going4potty · 13/10/2005 14:26

Well done buffyslay. Maybe i am overdramatic and slightly over cautious, but i jst cant leave him on his own, would never forgive myself if something happened.

tortoiseshell · 13/10/2005 14:29

Ok, anything could happen while you're in the shop. But, what if as you get the child out of the car, a mad motorcyclist comes careering into the forecourt and hits your child? What if you get hit by a car, and child runs off into the road?

What if the petrol station is held up by gunmen and your child is taken hostage? (I would much rather they were safe in the car than at the mercy of an armed robber!) Life is a series of risks, we just balance them. You could

Easy · 13/10/2005 14:43

You know, it has NEVER occured to me to get ds out of the car while I go to pay for petrol. When he was a baby it would have taken me about 8 times longer to unstrap him, carry him across the forecourt, juggle with him to pay, then do up his ruddy car seat again.

Now he's 6, he's much safer sitting in the car listening to a cd story than he is wandering about the forecourt.

I can't see that you perceive the risks of leaving them in the car to be great enough to warrant the extra effort.

Eaney · 13/10/2005 14:50

I really think it's about your level of paronia. I watch to many TV crime shows and it affects my judgement. As a result I am overprotective and would never leave DS or DD in car alone but I don't think I'm neccessarily right. I am pandering to my own anxiety I think.

Those people who leave there children in locked cars are probably more relaxed and less likely given to anxiety. I read stories like some of those on this thread and it just reinforces my anxiety.

tarantula · 13/10/2005 15:16

Goddess Im so glad I dont drive. Phew think of all these horrible desisions Id have to make. Ill stick to cycling and walking with dd but only off road or on roads populated by honda civics mind cos you never know what might happen.

going4potty · 13/10/2005 15:27

ts, i agree life is a series of risks, we just worry about different things...one mans poison....etc

spidermama · 13/10/2005 16:01

Haven't read the entire thread but would any of you, in all seriousness, unstrap and take out four young children from the car and take them in with you to pay for petrol.

Sorry, but that's bonkers. You'd end up going nowhere because it's all too much hassle.

bambi06 · 13/10/2005 16:16

i know someone that went inside the house to unload her shopping and left car unlocked with baby in car in car seat and when she came outside the car was gone!! 5 mins that was all...the car was found not far away with baby safely still in its car seat.. they obviously didnt realise a baby was there and was an opportunist thief so i would never as know what CAN happen plus they have been lots of drive offs in petrol stations as theyre are again opportunists waiting as they know people will leave car open to pay for petrol..

ellasmum1 · 13/10/2005 16:25

I have to leave my dd(2yrs) stapped in car seat in UNlocked car or car alarm keeps going off due to movement.I do this if nipping into local shop/paying for petrol.Always feel uneasy though.have occasionally left house to post letter/nip in shop on corner while she was having long naps in her cot when she was a little younger but know i shouldn't have.

Blandmum · 13/10/2005 16:39

Blimey, I always left the kids in the car when I went to pay for the petrol. It never occured to me not to, if I am being honest.

While there is a tiny risk of the cargetting nicked, there is a larger risk of you all being run over, and even another tiny risk of the child being snatched out of your arms and whisked away!

Eaney · 13/10/2005 17:13

I wonder if anyone has changed their mind after reading some of the horror stories. Anyone?

ruty · 13/10/2005 18:38

i can't tell you what i'd do if i had four children. I can only tell you what i'd do with mu one year old. And i'd never leave him alone in the car, never.

jacobsmummy · 13/10/2005 19:36

Spidermama, i also have four children and wouldn't tke them in with me to pay for petrol. Not because of the hassle, but because I think its too risky. I only have two hands!

Have had to take all of them into station before for a we stop on a long journey and it was frightening, people speed past you and it's so hard to have a safe hold on them all, when you are also juggling a bag, drinks etc etc

It's all about weighing up the risks, if i just had one or two children, would probably never leave them.

There must be some advantaes to having a large family, but cant think of any just now (apart from the bread never going off )

Roxswood · 13/10/2005 19:42

No no no, never.

If my little one falls asleep in the car and I don't want to wake her up, I sit in the car with her. If I have to get petrol I go to Asda or Tesco where I can pay at the pump or pay at the drivethru checkout.
I would never ever leave her in the car while I went out of sight of the car, like someone said, she could choke and you wouldn't know until you came back to find your child dead. And no I don't leave her unattended at home either, she sleeps with me and she comes with me from room to room and will do until she's old enough to know to come straight to me if there's a problem.
People used to do these things years ago and an awful lot more children died because of it, do you really think you could live with yourself?

yossa · 13/10/2005 20:22

i only leave my 2 in the car to pay for petrol. My DH left DS in the car to go in a shop to nip in for a paper, he could see him at all times but a cop car came along and threatened to do him for abandonment! Maybe that clarifies the legal position. depends whether they have done their quota for the day(wink)

jacobsmummy · 13/10/2005 20:53

yossa, are you in the UK or US?

yossa · 13/10/2005 21:07

i'm in uk - live in south but this was in birkenhead where DH comes from.

Original poster
Friendlygirl · 13/10/2005 21:22

Eaney. I started this thread and it has changed the way I will behave. The thing that really worried me was the choking thing. I no longer want to be out of both sight and earshot of the children unless dh or another reliable adult is htere. Thank you everyone for helpong me think more deeply about this.

OP posts:
magicfarawaytree · 13/10/2005 22:22

no - it can take someone who know what they are doing less than 10 mins to get into your car+ also the choking issue.

magicfarawaytree · 13/10/2005 22:23

sorry should read 10 seconds to get inside your car...

swedishmum · 14/10/2005 00:06

Do you remember the guy who was not charged with manslaughter after his car caught fire with his kids inside. I'd never leave my baby - even took her to the ATM today though I parked right by it. Yes I had 3 under 3 with a husband abroad but never needed an excuse. Children are too important to leave alone. We live so far in the middle of nowhere but I would never leave dd alone though many people I know leave their kids alone asleep in the car outside. However, I am more chilled with my older kids than many people I know.