Curious - why don't more people use baby carriers?

[togarama]

I'm increasingly curious about this and just wondered if others on MN could shed some light on their choice of buggy Vs carrier (or both).

I don't know many other parents IRL and those I do come into contact with are often so obviously negative about baby carriers that I don't think I would gain anything other than a sore ear from asking them....

We've always used slings, wraps and other carriers with 20 month old DD because they're comfortable (for us and baby), convenient (especially since they leave your hands free) and fit our lifestyle. We walk a lot, like to be spontaneous and don't want to have to think about buggy access / stair problems every time we leave the house. I also travel a lot by train and tube and can't even begin to imagine the hassle of trying to cart a pram or buggy around the public transport system.

However, I'm always very conscious when with other parents (e.g. dropping DD at nursery and being stared at...) that we're very much in a minority and I don't really understand why. Carriers just seem to have so many advantages and appear much more logical for commuting and city living. But buggies are somehow still the choice of the majority.

Why is this?

With ds1 I used a baby bjorn (it was a gift) and by 5/6 months I was very uncomfortable carrying him so stopped. For ds2 I bought a stretchy wrap, but honestly found it so complicated and obvioulsy just didn't practice enough! We also both got very hot (June baby). I bought a Mei tei and felt like he was going to fall out constantly (again complete inexperience and no-one to help/advise how to do it properly) so gave up on that one very quickly

Going to be having 3 under 3 in a few months so really will need to start babywearing properly then! Thinking of buying a connecta? Can anyone recommend these? Main reason that it looks really easy to just quickly slip on!

I agree! I love my sling! I think there is a perception that slings/carriers are bad for your back whereas like any baby product some are good and some are bad.

DS is 99 percentile and 20lb at 4 months. I love my sling (moby) and far prefer it to the buggy. I don't have any back problems with it at all.
I found the baby bjorn was very uncomfortable. Unfortunately I think this is probably the first experience of carriers for many people and this turns them off all carriers.

I can't understand how people think pushing a buggy round the shop is easier than not. My few buggy experiences have put me off completely. I find it a complete nuisance and am sorry I spent money on one.

MimsyRogers: "Perhaps you haven't tried the right type of buggy yet?"

Who knows? If DD decides tomorrow that she hates carriers, I'll be back on here asking for your advice on buggies !

DieDieDieDiNARGGHHHRod: Do their arms and legs get cold? Or if you wrap them up a bit, overhot?

Nope. As in any other situation, you just have to dress them appropriately. If it's cold, I'd put tights under their trousers (or put on a fluffy all-in-one suit in the real winter). If it's hot, you just dress them very lightly and use a carrier made from very light material.

Reflecting on some of the comments so far, I think that there's a big difference between women (never mind mums!) in terms of how much stuff we need to carry round with us. Babies also need varying amounts of "stuff" depending on whether BF or FF, needing toys for distraction or not, needing special blankets for comfort or not etc.. Added to all this, there's sometimes a psychological element to how carriers and buggies make you "feel".

Personally, I feel much more comfortable physically and psychologically with my hands free and minimal "luggage" (changing gear and spare clothes in a mini-daysack only, keys and cards in my pockets). If I had a child who needed much more stuff, or I wasn't able to shop on the internet, then I would probably need a buggy even though it would make me feel "weighed down" and "trapped".

Carriers make me feel "free" in the same way that buggies seem to do for several other posters.

Well, I'm the other way.

I've never used a buggy/pram/pushchair and I can't ever think of a single time I've wished for one.

Oh and my DD is a 91st percentile 4 year old - I'm just off to pick her up from school and will put her on my back in the playground so I can walk us to me friends for tea. She's always frazzled after school and this way she can have a half hour kip as I walk us up the hill

ColdComfortFarm: when I was on mat leave one of the joys for me was not to be limited to the big supermarkets etc..

Huh? I don't understand the link between any of this and using a buggy. I spent my mat leave travelling around with a (usually sleeping, sometimes feeding) baby in a carrier and felt that I was having a much easier time than the other mothers trying to manoeuvre prams in and around shops, up and down steps, in and out of the tube etc.. I sometimes stopped to help them. I ate in restaurants, went to museums and art galleries and had lots of fun on the beach.

There are many valid complaints you can make about carriers (too hot, could be uncomfortable, medically unable to carry the weight, need separate time from baby, worried about exposing baby to the elements, no ledge for "the weekly shop" etc..) but being restricted in where you can go is a bit of an odd one IMO.

'It does spoil the look of your outfit a bit too '

Coldcomfort you need to choose a sling that goes with your outfits >

I have a friend who made a sling to match her wedding dress so she could carry her one year old dd on her wedding day!

I have a wrap sling for home, a Beco (love this, so comfy) for quick 'clip on and go' type trips and an old Bugaboo Frog for when a buggy is best. I feel well set up now, DD is 8wks old and it has taken this long to figure out what works for us!

Also, I think that there isn't much sling availability in shops, Baby Bjorns and the odd Baba Sling (is that what they're called?) in TK Maxx. As such they're not 'mainstream'. I only found mine through loads of internet research.

Using both seems to have suited us very well. I have a Connecta which is so very easy to put on and take off..ideal for nipping on and off the bus! The pram is great for longer walks.

Not sure if anyone answered your question diedie, but no, you cannot wear your baby facing outwards in an Ergo or similar. They are designed to support babies hips and backs in an anatomically correct position and facing outwards would not facilitate this.

Besides, my DD just turns her head to the side and sees plenty

PS: If people are wanting to try different types out look up Slumber Roo on the internet, they rent them out for 2 wks at a time and you can then get a discount if you buy it. I rented the Beco we've got now before getting it. here

Unwind:I have another theory....I wonder is there some slight stigma to it - as in, she's tied her baby to her because she can't afford a pram?

My mum raised this half-jokingly too. She said that when she was a child in the 1950s, prams (with baby in, obv.) had pride of place in the house and were real status symbols. Not having a pram, or having a really old tatty pram would have signified low socio-economic status. She warned me that elderly relatives would think that we couldn't afford a pram.

I don't think it means anything these days though.

We had a babybjorn and I could never figure out how you were supposed to get DS into it with only one pair of hands.

Once we had wrestled him into it he HATED it and screamed until released.

Because if mum falls so does baby

ApocalypseCheese: Because if mum falls so does baby

Aside from drunken student antics, I've never fallen over in my adult life, with or without baby.

Sure, this is a risk, but a very small one for most of us. Similarly, someone could trip on a paving stone and lose hold of a buggy on a slope near a busy road. (Happened to my mum with me many years ago - luckily, dad dashed into the road and rescued me.)

I'm sure we're all very careful on here, carrier and buggy users alike...

I think what ColdComfort was getting at was that it's far, far easier to carry a ton of shopping home in a pram than in bags - which you then have to cart around as well as the baby. I suppose you could get a shopping trolley, but that rather defeats the handsfree argument.

I hauled allsorts home in the pram/puschchair. I remember ds sitting atop great bags of compost from the garden centre. Not as a newborn though

I miss having a pram actually. It was very useful.

for that I have the baby in the sling and the pushchair full of the shopping.
best of both worlds

Togarama, I was replying to those who assumed that by 'shopping' I meant 'going to the supermarket' and said they did internet shopping instead. When my babies were little and I wasn't working, I enjoyed doing a lot of my shopping locally - pottering around to the butcher's, greengrocers etc - and making that a nice walk with shopping thrown in, feeling part of my local community etc. I wouldn't have done that if I had to lug the bags home and have a baby strapped to me, and having to carry nappies etc as well. Having a pram made it possible. And as I always carry a bag for my stuff I was actually less burdened with a pram than I am these days. I quite miss having a pram!

I would never wear a rucksack on aesthetic grounds - sorry! If I'd had my babies closer together I would definitely have looked into a sling to avoid a double pushchair, but had quite big gaps so just had a buggyboard or they walked.

ColdComfort: Aha - I understand now. I read a different meaning into your previous post and it confused me.

While I won't be using one much (dedicated buggy lover), can I ask opinions on a very easy to use sling that will make both me and DS most comfortable on an 18-hour trip? It will be 3 hours in London airport, 8 hours on large plane (in coach!!), 2 hour layover, 2 hour small flight (coach again so very small space), then 3 hour drive. I need a sling that I can very easily pop him in and out of - I don't want to be faffing with it each time he needs a nappy change/leg stretch, etc.

Opinions most appreciated!!

Oh sorry DS will be 8 weeks old!!

That's Ok, I'm feeling all nostalgic now! I never had a show-off pushchair - just a cheap old-fashioned pram from Ebay when they were small so I could look at 'em, then a maclaren buggy. I still ended up carrying them a lot even after we ditched that - 'carry me, mummeee'! I do agree that the the BabyBjorn puts people off. I hated it, baby hated it, never tried another sort. WOuld never have been pram-free, but might have used a sling in the mix if I had known there were comfortable ones. I would still have had to carry a bag though, so it would never have meant total freedom.

I used a wrap sling a lot when DD was small, allowed me to push her big brother in the buggy when he was too tired to walk (he was 2.5 at the time) and carry all our stuff, shopping, library books etc.

I also have an ergo and have just started using it more (DD will be 2 at Christmas) for the school run. Saves having to park a buggy and I make DS dangle his bookbag and lunchbox from his scooter handlebars.

I've also used a buggy no probs on public transport, I have a lightweight maclaren. And that includes busses, trains and the tube. Sling is great for airports tho...

Starberries - if that tiny, stretchy wrap liek kari-me or moby.

The slings that are widely commercially available are just crap. People give up because they cause pain. Tomy etc. Baby Bjorn is better but pricier/overpriced.

Sling aficionados don't like Baby Bjorn but they neglect the man-factor. A man is far more likely to use a Baby Bjorn than a large bit of stretchy fabric artfully tied.

Sling wearing is often confused with middle-class lentil weaving and prejudices are not easily overcome. The way they are distributed - often via a SAHM who is most likely quite earthy and likely to also be into real nappies - reinforces the image. I'm not saying it's right but there it is. Lots of things in pregnancy, birth, childrearing, and health in general, suffer from the same prejudices.

I think some people see pushchairs as status symbols that they can buy into, and would much rather project what image they can via a pushchair.

Plus pushchairs simply do carry things like bags and shopping so are sometimes invaluable, whereas a sling can be seen as an extra.

I tried a Mei Tai for dd2 and just couldn't get used to it.

I recently bought a second hand Patapum Toddler - dd2 is almost 2 and she likes being in it but I have a problem with it.

Maybe someone who uses one could help me out with this?

When I fasten the little strap across my chest it squishes my boobs and although not really uncomfortable it looks wrong.

It's like the strap is in the wrong place. Or am I just a weird shape?