Reins????

[shirleycat1]

My 16 month old wants to walk walk walk, but he WILL NOT hold my hand. I live in a busy area where people drive like maniacs a lot of the time. I'm considering reins.

I had reins when I was little, but you never see anyone in them these days. I told my friend I was thinking of getting them and she said "what, like a dog, can't you just teach him not to go in the road". The short answer to that is no, but I don't want my little boy to look like a dog.

Any thoughts on this?

I see quite a few reins around here, its a very busy area and plenty of mums have reins on the young toddlers going down the main road which is v busy of traffic and also quite crowded. In quiet areas can see you could get on a bit better without them but I used to put the backpack one on for my ds, stopped when he was coming up to 2. if you feel he will be safer just use it

I loved reins: far less constrictive than holding a child by the hand or strapping them in the buggy, and if you're good at handling them you can have them long enough to for him to explore but pull them up quickly to save him from falling. I didn't care if they looked like dogs as long as they had the same freedom to explore.

'As my mother always said when confronted with the "it's treating your child like a dog" - would you keep your dog safer than your child?'

I thought dogs were kept on leads to keep children safe, not to protect the dog from running in the road.

I obviously have a very different opinion to others on here (nothing new there)and am quite surprised at how many of you use them. None of my friends or family, in fact know one I know even casually has used them. We live in a busy party of London too.

I don't like the thought of using them so that children march in a straight line or because you don't have to hold hands then- I think they need freedom and exploration and reins just seem to me indicative of that being lost in childhood.
If one of my children had persistently run in the road than I guess I would have been tempted, but the thought of restraining them in this way does make me feel uncomfortable

Reins are good. There are times for exploration - like in the safety of a park, not when you are trying to do the school run/go to the shops etc.

And I used to use the harness to stop DCs from climbing out of the buggy, which only had a waist/crotch strap, and out of the Tesco's trolley, while I turned my back for a nanosecond.

I didn't mind mine climbing out of the buggy/attempting to do so in a trolley. I did used to sit my youngest in the trolley and feed him berries though

Round here reins were a way of allowing freedom, not restricting it. There is no way I would have let a 15mo to walk down a narrow pavement next to a main road without some form of restraint, and reins allow far more freedom than handholding or buggies. As for not wanting to look like a dog- surely that's more about the parents' feeling than the toddler's?

Little children ARE a lot like dogs.

LMAO at some of the nutty posts on this thread!

Do those who don?t approve of reins not have/use pushchairs/prams/highchairs/bicycle seats with safety straps, bike helmets, stair gates, cots, playpens, socket covers, cupboards locks, etc?! All of these, just like reins are safety measures designed to restrain/prevent a child from doing something. There is good reason for all of them too ? babies and toddlers do not have the life experience to judge safety and protect themselves from harm. Using these things does not mean children wont learn personal safety skills ? it just helps keeps them safe while they do so.

Reins actually allow children more freedom on a walk than holding hands as they allow them to explore while still being within a safe distance of the parent and can be easily kept away from hazards.

Ultimately of course it is parental choice but do NOT be put off using something that could save your child?s life just because someone else doesn?t like it.

I used to be on my high-horse about reins, but then I nearly lost DD1 in a crowded market in Mexico (she went through a phase of thinking it was really funny to run off and get me to run after her ). There was a stall selling reins and gratefully I bought some.

Now DD3 has one of those backpacks, and we very rarely use it as a harness, but it's bloody handy sometimes.

They have their place.

The backpacks with a strap on them are brilliant- not only do you have some control, but the child feels grown-up, and it is easier to find their stuff (water bottle etc) when you are out an about, rather than rummaging around in your own bag. DS1 (3.10) now pretty reliable around roads (and says earnestly, "Mummy, that cat didn't follow the green cross code"), but still wears his backpack, and I use the strap on busy streets.

yy Coalition

I don't really see the point of reins, they just need to learn to hold hands if they won't they go in the pram, it's not hard. DD's friends are triplets and they never even used reins.

OK - well I have to admit that I actually used to put all mine on a dog's lead!!

All mine were early walkers and I lived in central London. With DD1 I bought reins and it meant I had the confidence to walk with her in the street before she had even turned 1. By the time I had DD2 she was just 2 and very willful. I needed to hold her hand still but she would often slip my hand and run off (difficult to deal with when pushing the buggy with DD2) and I found the reins a tiny bit too short and they way they looped back on themselves a bit inconvenient. Sure, for safety's sake I could have strapped her in the buggy and had DD2 in the sling, but she liked to walk and I think it is good for little ones to walk as much as they can. So I bought a nice dog lead with a wrist loop and clipped that onto the reins harness instead. I could hold her hand, but the lead was looped over my wrist so if she did slip my hand I didn't lose her. Used the same for DD2 and DS. They were out of the buggy completely by the time they were 2, walked everywhere and were safe scooting on the pavement with me from about 2 and a half. Having them on a lead in the early days of walking meant we could be without the buggy and they could learn road safety without me panicking that if I was dealing with the younger one and had my attention turned for a second they would shoot off into the road.

I live in the country now so reins not such a necessity, but had DS on a lead again just the other day. We were walking along the sea wall at high tide - he was just LONGING to jump in, so I took the dog's lead off looped it round under his arms and the whole walk became a lot safer.

Just do what works for you. And remember, (as someone else has said) children are not that dissimilar to puppies.......!!

Another reins user here. I would much rather see a toddler in reins than strapped into a buggy.

IMO people use buggies far too much to restain children so they don't get used to walking any distance at an early age.

"I don't really see the point of reins, they just need to learn to hold hands if they won't they go in the pram" but if they are old enough to need reins they shouldn't be in a pram. (unless they are acutally asleep or nearly)

My point exactly French fancy - I do not use reins and a buggy (except when I have a younger child in a buggy) having the reins provides a halfway point before the child is able to be without any extra help/ restraint to keep safe -

I would imagine that many people who continue to use buggies longer, don't drive (I do not) because the child does need to walk further, may need to nap and there is somewhere to hang shopping etc. If you drive then perhaps you can dispense with a buggy much of the time, after age 2 (depending on the child). It all depends on the kind of trips you make - there is no way I judge people for not using reins so I find the judging of people who use reins (at all) a bit mystifying tbh.

'..if they are old enough to need reins they shouldn't be in a pram.'
At 18 months we could be out the house for 5 hours a day, there is no way we could have done that without the pram.
I think using reins because the child refuses to hold hands is a cop out, what happens if they refuse to wear the reins one day?
Personally I found it much easier to insist on hand holding in busy areas and when crossing the road from an early age, if they refused then they had to sit in the buggy, it took maybe three or four grumbly sits in the buggy before they got the message and we were all happy.

"I use reins but still insist of holding hands across the road - it's not one or the other."
Absolutely

And if they fall over, you can stop them hitting ground with a lean back on the reins - a lot less painful.

Yes but you can hold reins and push a buggy with the LO in far easier than trying to push the buggy with one hand whilst your other hand is holding the toddler.

NellyTheElephant - I used to clip a dog lead to my DS's reins too! It was one of those double ended training leads, and I looped and clipped the other end to belt buckle in my jeans. I was walking along the river, next to a road frequented by heavy traffic and lorries. DS wanted to walk, I wanted to let him, and it was easier to push the empty pram this way. DS wasn't road safe. He still isn't.

I wasn't fond of reins. Prefer the Little Lite. If I didn't have the Little Lite (or reins in the past) DS and I would never have had our fun little adventure walks into town. I would have been too scared that he'd slip away from me into the busy road.

I was on the 'but reins are for dogs' side of the fence until I had DS. Sometimes for their safety you just need to do it. Try the little backpack wtih the rein attached - much less dog like but the same effect.

I do not understand the "like a dog comment".

In that case don't use a car seat, it is like tying them to a chair.

Reins are great, you can get your purse or phone out of your bag or anything else that you need your hands free for, without loosing control of your LO.

Obviously when you get to the park or open space let them run around.

I have beeb criticised on MN before for this
opinion, but I saw a child knocked down because his DM was trying to get her phone out and lost her grip on his hand. He recovered after a month and a pin in his leg.