Contraception for girls under 16

[subrosablonde]

I'm a 64-year-old blogger and not yet a grandmother, although I live in hope!

This morning I wrote about the Isle of Wight's Primary Healthcare Trust deciding to offer girls, from the age of 13 to 25, the Pill without a doctor's prescription.

This really does concern me because other areas of the UK may decide to roll this out and I feel that we're letting our female children down badly by taking this action.

If you'd like to read my post it's here: subrosa-blonde.blogspot.com/2010/09/sinking-to-new-low.html

It would be super if some of you allowed me to publish your opinions but I certainly won't do it without your written permission. My readership is from far and wide although the majority is 45+ and male. You will see from some of the comments that men are angry too but they see this as a woman's problem.

Thanks so much for reading this.

Pill.....

....between the knees.

This has been done to death, and better, by Victoria Gillick, who took it to the House of Lords, and she still lost.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gillick_competence

Inflammatory nonsense.

The pill has long been available to any 14 year old who has the guts to turn up at the Gp surgery, and the ones who don't have the guts are often faced with the old split condom dilemma - abortion (and the telling of the parens, and the pain and the shame and the misery) or baby?

Do you honestly think that making contraception difficult to obtain will stop people having sex? "Girls, from the age of 13 to 25" or NOT 'female children'. They are young women, with their own thoughts, their own opinions, their own autonomy over their own bodies. Why on earth would you choose to make it difficult to protect themselves from an unwated pregnancy?

Do you think there was ever a Golden Age when all women kept their legs slammed shut until marriage for fear of being publicly villified?

We have the highest teen pregnancy rate in Europe. It's not good. If you think the pill is risky, take a look at the toll and abortion takes on the young female body and mind, take a look at the stress a pregnancy will put on a 14 year old's development.

Girls and women are not cattle, to be herded and controlled into the breeding programs of marriage. People have sex for fun, as do bonobo chimps and dolphins. Young women are people too and we do not have the right to try to sieze control of their fertility from them by restricting access to contraceptives any more than necessary.

Im Catholic and im also honest .....if I had a teen daughter (which I dont) she would be encouraged to have the implant.

Babies should be born because they are wanted and children shouldnt be having children.

If asked to choose between my commitment as a catholic and my duty as a parent I know what Id choose.

Its responsibilty.

I'd rather see people using contraception than wind up pregnant.

Sure, in an ideal world, people wouldn't have sex at all until they are 16.

But this is far from an ideal world.

As far as men getting angry about this, tbh I can't really be bothered with angry white middle-aged men anymore.

I'm getting rather tired of their tyranny in general, it has a lot to answer for and is largely responsible for how whacked things have become; the sooner they shuffle off this mortal coil, the better, IMO.

Yes, yawn indeed, Little. As first posts go, not even mildly interesting

Signed
A mother of two daughters and one son in Scotland

Same here, nickchic.

They will all be getting lessons in condom usage as well from an early age.

We don't hide our bodies or sexuality from them.

It was hidden from me. It's only because I happened to have a lot of initiative that I educated myself about things and, thankfully being in France at the time, got on the Pill at 15 and learned how to practice safe sex there as well.

My ultra-Lutheran host mother at the time was fully supportive of it, too, herself the mother of two adult sons, now the mother of two adult married sons and a grandmother x4.

Like it or not a 13 year old does have the right to decide what happens to their body and providing they have sufficient understanding have more right to consent to or refuse medical procedures than their parents.

Surely it is better that a young woman asking for the morning after pill is offered contraception rather than a lecture. Teenagers are not going to stop having sex because someone with a cats bum face told them to. Teenagers have been having sex since time began, their bodies conspire to make them want to have sex. All we can do is make sure they have the self respect not to have have sex they will regret and enough education to have safe sex.

I am sure that a lack of propects and low self-esteem are at the root of more teenage pregnancies than anything else.

'Do you think there was ever a Golden Age when all women kept their legs slammed shut until marriage for fear of being publicly villified?'

Or males who kept it in their trousers until they were married?

its astounding that anyone would think the way that the op does tbh.

what is missing is parenting classes to teach parents how to support young people who are in relationships on how to be responsible, how to build trust between parent and young person, where to go to, who to speak to, the pros and the cons.

imo, a 13 yo who is having willing sex, is likley to be be missing something in their life me thinks, and i think that investment in parenting would be as good as giving out the pill

No expatinscotland, I don't think that and of course there were teenage pregnancies when I was young. But the best contraception we had was the thought of bringing disgrace on our family.

Colditz, girls are legally children until they reach the age of 16. English law I believe and certainly Scottish law.

I do a bit of voluntary work with the local teens and so have built up a good rapport with many especially as I have 2 teen dc myself.

Over the summer holidays I had at least 3 teenagers come to me and tell me theyd had sex (all were sensible) the thing that had upset 2/3 of these kids was the fact that no sooner had they had sex then the other party had moved along it was sex for sex sake to that person to the kids I supported they both said the same thing .....'i just wanted to be close to him,i just wanted to cuddle'.....kids need hugs teens need cuddles teens need reassurance that things are ok ......those of you with teens even prickly moody teens hug them lots - they need it.

The 3rd teen???

Well she had sex(she is 17) cos it was 'well good' and there was no doubts she would do it again and soon and she was asking me if id make her an appointment with the GP to get contraceptive advice.

You cant beat 'em but you can guide 'em.

And how many years ago was this, subrosa? Because I'll wager London to a brick it was also back in the days when marital rape was legal, when it was legal to sack a woman for being pregnant even if she were married, when women couldn't hold a bank account or have a credit card in their own name if they were married, when they could be sexually harrassed or bullied at work with no legal recourse.

I have zero interest in going back to a time when people were a disgrace to their families for having sex because quite frankly I find ideas like this on par with the same type of extremism that sanctions honour killing and puts women on par with chattel.

Females are not 'girls' from the ages of 13 to 25. They are people with a right to control their own reproduction, and personally I applaud men like Kevin Noble to stand up for that right against the pervasive sense of white, male, middle-age of entitlement that is making a mess of this country with their insatiable desire to control women, children and the poor and to keep them down at the heel in order to do so.

The best contraception is a high sense of self-esteem and self-respect, in an enviroment of good prospects and a decent future.

They are not children. They are Minors. Medically, they are not children once they reach the age of 12.

"Disgrace to our family"

You don't want a debate, you want to rant about Dirty Girls Should Keep Their Legs Together.

Go for it.

Just don't expect to rant unchallenged.

I have a mother like subrosa.

As a result I went behind her back and often she had no idea where I really was.

I did well at school. I towed the line enough to get her off my back so she had no idea what I was getting up to because heaven knows, there's no way I could in a million years speak to her about the truth and what I was feeling inside.

Big parts of my life, like the first time I got my heart broken, she knew nothing about because I felt like she didn't get it as she couldn't accept that her child was in a woman's body.

Subrosa, even if legally you are a child until 16, where contraception is concerned and the 'child' has reasonable understanding they are legally allowed to make their own medical decisions and withhold their medical records from their parents.

Like expat I have no interest in going back to 'the good old days' where men had so much control over womens bodies and lives.

Because it's always about the females, of course.

I used to hear rants like this at home.

I'd always respond, 'What about the guy?' 'What about the boy?' 'What about the man?' until they finally got the message and shut up because I was buying none of it.

Read this blog. When the female uses the Pill condom use is much less likely.

Hmm, last I checked, it's a male who wears one.

Theres 3 young girls pregnant who are part of the 'group' I know,not one of them is pregnant through choice -none of them made the decision to become a young mum ( all the 'dads' of these babies have moved on),these girls are pregnant because the 'contraception' they used failed them or because they believed they were 'safe',when we support these girls and boys in being open about sex and giving them the confidence to speak up about needing advice needing morning after pills needing education on what you do if you miss a pill etc etc thats when teenage pregnancies will lessen.

Contraception and support from society will give our young adults the confidence to have RESPONSIBLE sex.

What upsets me when these young adults say to me it wasnt about the sex is was about being with him...i feel very .

that's so sad, nicks.

Neither my husband nor I had sex before we got married. We will teach our children that sex is for marriage and hope and pray that they think the same.

However, this is not guaranteed. We live in a fallen world and things don't happen perfectly. While I would rather my children waited for marriage, I would much prefer they used contraception until they were in a position to have children.

We have already 'let down our female children' by allowing a society that treats sex as a cheap commodity rather than something wonderful and precious. Contraception isn't the cure for that, but has to be part of reducing the problems from that

Expatinscotland, I'm 64. I've had my own bank account since I was 16 and I still do. When I was young there were no credit cards. People saved to buy what they wanted, did without, or borrowed from family if what was required was essential.

I'm so disappointed that only Mrs Gangly mentions having any form of trust relationship with her children. Good for her and yes, nothing happens perfectly.

Seems not only are parents quite happy to hand over the upbringing of the children to the nanny state, they're also quite proud of it instead of wondering why minors do have sex, which nickschic explains.

My own children didn't have sex education at school until they were in 4th/5th year. I plucked up the courage to discuss it with them long before that, with the emphasis to the boys that I would ensure they took their share of responsibility should any girl become pregnant. Much better the information came from me than a teacher they only knew from the classroom.

Thanks for commenting all of you. Sorry some found it boring. I wonder how boring you'll find it when you're my age because the subject will still be here. Just maybe then you too will feel a little responsible for allowing governments to get it wrong.

'When I was young there were no credit cards. People saved to buy what they wanted, did without, or borrowed from family if what was required was essential.'

Do you read The Daily Mail?

So you imply that anyone who doesn't agree with your point of view is an irresponsible parent who can't be bothered educating their children about sex.

Your credibility grows by leaps and bounds with every post.

[Sighs and pays out more rope]

Who has said that they haven't educated their children about sex? MrsGangly has merely repeated what the rest of us has said about hoping that our children make the right choices and doing our best to make sure they have the right information to do that.

IMO what we've got wrong is allowing uptight people to teach our children that sex is wrong and dirty. Look at the Netherlands which has the lowest rate of teenage pregnancy in Europe - they are on the whole open and honest with their children about sex and sex education is in the context of relationships. Dutch children are encouraged to debate moral and emotional consequences of having sex and taught how to keep their self-respect.

The only way forward to make sure that all our young men and women have healthy attitudes towards sex and have the self-respect to say no to sex which will be emotionally damaging.