HELP. I am having real problems with GP leaving tablets in reach of children AGAIN

[OnEdge]

I am getting so mixed up with this one.
recently, I had a problem with my Dad leaving tablets on his bedside table where my 3 yo DD and 1yo DS could access them easily. I posted on here about it.

Then to my releif, I went round, and he had them in this special bag so that he could quickly put them all on top of his wardrobe when we arrived.

My DD is staying there tonight. Was just chatting to Mum and she said that DD ran off hiding something. hey couldnt find it, and were asking her what it was. They asked her if it was tablets and she no. In the end , they concluded it had been a packet of salt out of some crisps. Mum then said her tablet draw was shut. It turns out that in her bedside table, in the top drawer she stores all her medications.

My DD sleeps in her Grandma's bed. So I said to Mum, "Does that mean that she is now in your room, alone (admittedly asleep) with tablets in a drawer next to her?"

Mum got really cross, and said that it was their house and there was no where else to put them. DD didn't touch tablets anyway.

I don't know what to do now.

I am worried, because 1 yo DS is now toddling and I have another one on the way.

I don't think its safe, but Mum is getting really narked now, she blames it on my anxiety.

Also, when I was a toddler I had to have my stomach pumped out because I swallowed some of her tablets.

ah yes. You argument, not mine. Mind you I would never never allow an under 3 to eat a lolly if I was not watching like a hawk..........

Your

self editing typos on a thread unnecessary.obvious what you meant

and what a mimsy risk averse world if lollies are to be feared.practically everything has a potential to be a danger.doesnt mean exclude lollies and sugar based confectionery, just means get a sensible balance

what about the social benefits of granny and and grand daughter having fun,giggling and the illicit fun of having a sweetie mummy doesnt usually allow.thats what grannys do

Fuckin 'ell scottishmummy calm down !

Go away if you are just going to be insulting and take the piss out of people who are kindly responding to me asking for advice.

I don't want to read your bollocks anyway, it really isn't helping.

Go and argue about something worth arguing about preferabley with someone else.

are you seeking,confirmation that lollies danger poses a risk?that your parents are "toxic" as has been suggested

parenting is about positive risk taking eg scooter.letting toddler ride a scooter is potentially risky
-falls
-soft tissue injury
-HI
-Graze/scrape

so as parents do we
a. not allow scooter whatsoever.even go google an accident website for stats on injuries.disallow too dangerous
b. weigh up risks.the pro and cons.monitor safe usage.buy a helmet if necessary

so despite risks,most people decide on positive risk taking

re:lollies.same principle.yes potential risk.yes potential choking obstruction BUT vast majority of children who eat lollies come to no harm.so as long as granny supervises cannot see the problem

the medication: i have emphasised this is their home they have capacity.you need to negotiate how they store their own meds when children visit.if you decide you cannot negotiate meaningfully then dont send them there.options such as dosette box are available should they agree.the suggestion of reading all about toxic parents,well i think that was ott.however only you know if they are toxic

are you a worrier - do you disproportionately worry. may i suggest lolly danger isnt as prevalent perhaps as you think and as for the stats linked about accidents.well i could also link reason for admission to A&E such as tripping over slippers.we dont avoid slippers

your thread has a lot of themes
which i contributed to.so you dont like the response?well open forum you will get a range of answers you dont like.but i haven't said your pov is bollocks.i have contended lolly danger is not a paediatric emergency.and the odd wee lolly from granny wont kill

Suggesting the book "Toxic Parents" is not the same as claiming OP's parents are toxic.

I specifically explained that the title may be off putting. The book is useful for adults who are wanting to think about their relationship with their parents.

Specifically guilt/boundaries etc.

I think that the analogy re the scooter is weak.

There will be fun exercise benefits with a scoter which outweigh the risk - what benefit is there to a DC taking GPs meds by mistake?!

Of course the lolly risk is small - but if an individual parent thinks - you know what -lollies are not recommended for children under 36months (it's on the packaging) - they are the most risky confectionary from a choking point of view - there are tons of other sweets out there - I don't want my DC to have lollies - well the GP's must respect this.

I feel for you, and understand your anxiety. For that reason, my mother has never been trusted to look after my DD.

I made the decision. It was hard to make and there are times when I would love a break, but my Mum wasn't a very fit mother when I was a child, nothing major, but I felt that she wasn't the adult in charge IYSWIM, health and safety wise, boundaries wise also, and she hasn't changed.

Pity, but there you go.
Good luck with finding a sensitive and responsible sitter, who listens to you and respects your wishes.

scottishmummy no point in going all contrite and factual now, too late. i resent you being so nasty, and I think you are immature, this IS an open forum - my opinion.

Actually, the main reason that I don't like her eating lollies is that it means they are effectively running about with a stick in their mouth . That is dangerous. I have worked in A&E and seen some horrific accidents happen to kids, so I am more aware than parents who haven't witnessed this. I can not prevent accidents happening to my kids, but I can reduce the risks, I would be an idiot not too.

The tablet situation is a life threatening situation. And I do expect my parents to remove that risk from a child. I would expect any adult caring for kids to remove the risk. It is society's role to ensure the safety of our children, and these are their grandchildren. i expect more.

Yes I am a worrier, but I am glad because it makes me aware and able to keep my kids as safe as possible.

That is my opinion and you can take the piss all you like.

tab I can understand that the title of the book invites some people to get a bit over excited and silly. I will however give it a go. I have a good relationship with my Mum , but there still deep rooted issues that I will be interested in addressing. Thanks again for the recomendation.

Zazen Sorry to hear about you and your Mum. i think people who havn't experienced this and have grown up with responsible Mums just don't get it. Mine is almost there, but just fucks up now and then. The hard part is that she becomes very defensive if i say the slightest thing and we end up rowing. She sees me risk assesing as a personal attack, like its all about her, I am just doing my job as a parent and trying to ensure the safety of my kids as much as possible.

onedge,my stance has not changed.lolly danger is disproportionate response to a manageable activity.i have made explicit about positive risk taking as a way we all manage parental anxietes.most parents dont avoid lolly as a dangerous

the suggestion of "toxic parent" reading is ott and as you as you say its good relationship between you and mum .to demonise the act of giving a lolly ad defiance and toxic is wholly innecesary

aa for the meds they are adults with capacity,in own home a community setting. you need to negotiate with them.you cannot compel them,suggestions of ultimatiums etc really arent on.thery resolve this to your satisfaction or dont send the kids there. i have repetedly saidf to negotiate and consider dosette box which are easily purchased on line or any chemist

perhaps you need to moderate your tone and not shout "bollocks" when you dont like posts or demand i stop posting

A&E is not representative of all risks.children trip over rugs,fall off scooters.we dont ban them.positive risk taking is making risk manageable and weigh up por and con

cannot cite A&E as accurate picture of risk.some extraordinary and freakish accidents present to A&E.

You really twist things to suit yourself, you are the one that needs to moderate tone, you are just enjoying being sarcastic and unpleasant.

I don't think that your bollocks is very helpful.

These are MY opinions, you are not backward in dishing your own out, and your personal insults, yet you become all affronted when you cop it back. If you are going to be offensive on an open forum, then don't act all amazed when when people take offense.

Very amuzing.

I can cite A&E as an accurate picture of my personal experience of risk.

And yes you DO keep banging on about dosette boxes, they aren't actualy childprof, so what is your point there? Useless in these circumstances.

any contrary opinion clearly winds you up.i have not made any personal slight to you.so if you must surmise do it correctly

i have contended your interpretation of risk from lolly danger is over stated

have asserted toxic parent suggestion is ott interpretetion,we agreed on that eventually

the meds, as i said negotiate and seek resolution for safe storage,if it doesnt resolve you have to decide whether or not to send dc there. have asserted your parents can store their own meds in their own home as they wish

re-read your posts, peruse bit you decide it is all "bollocks". i have not made any similar comments to you

and yes open forum,one doesnt necessarily need concur with posts. this is indicative of different interpretation of risk and management of risk

Oh you still here ? yawn.

You are absolutely right of course.

yawn?is that he best you can muster.play nicely,is your post afterall