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Original poster

Five year old keeps chewing the teat from his bottle.

46 replies

bubble99 · 10/05/2005 20:09

My five year old will only eat crisps. To make sure he gets enough sugar, I give him warm sugary tea in a bottle. I've noticed he chews the teat and the tea spills everywhere. Should I introduce a cup or just supplement with Haribou?

OP posts:
moozoboozo · 10/05/2005 20:31

Get him a tattoo while you're at it too.

Maybe "Kill the Pigs" or something.

LGJ · 10/05/2005 20:35

Make sure the tan tones with his Burberry baseball cap.............

lemonice · 10/05/2005 20:56

does he pull his own trousers up yet? If they are always hanging down his bottom then he may have grown out of his bottle and need a fag.

moozoboozo · 10/05/2005 20:58

Have you taughht him how to hotwire a car yet? If not, Its about time he learnt. Its a very important skill nowadays.

dropinthe · 10/05/2005 21:00

And how to roll a spliff!

lemonice · 10/05/2005 21:05

Can he move about without either a tall girl to lean on or a tiny bike ( or a combination of the two - very bad)?

LGJ · 10/05/2005 21:09

If he is going to be hotwiring cars, make sure you remove all his gold bracelets. Would hate them to catch on something and for the poor misunderstood blighter to be still there when the pigs turn up and get caught doing something illegal

lemonice · 10/05/2005 21:15

If you need a break sit him down in front of the tv there are some excellent educational programmes for his age group like Pimp My Ride which are very aspirational

frogs · 10/05/2005 21:30

Ha ha, I accidentally did this with ds when he was 2. Had made hot chocolate, and didn't realise dh had turned it into mocha by adding an entire espresso maker full of coffee. Gave ds a cupful as a bedtime drink -- he was bouncing off the walls till 11pm. And he had a really bad caffeine hangover for nursery the next day.

I blame the parents.

lemonice · 10/05/2005 21:40

Hoepfully he is too big for the playground toys at redrec/toppark/etc and spends all time there after dark so you know where he is

morningpaper · 10/05/2005 22:12

pmsl @ frogs

Original poster
bubble99 · 10/05/2005 22:36

His teeth are dark grey. Doesn't matter though does it? They fall out anyway.

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 10/05/2005 22:40

As long as you colour coordinate his outfits, Bubble, it shouldn't matter. They'll match his school uniform shorts, won't they?

hotmama · 10/05/2005 22:41

I can't add anything but I just had to say I literally have pissed myself laughing - must do more pelvic floor exercises.

Original poster
bubble99 · 10/05/2005 22:47

Mr Bubble picked up our DS1 and a few of his 7 year old classmates from a party recently. On the way home the boys were talking, in a very innocent 7 year old way, about who their 'girlfriends' were. So and so loved so and so etc. and this went on for a while during the journey. DH was smiling fondly as he drove until one little boy piped up with- "So, have you had sex with her yet?" How crap is that?

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 10/05/2005 23:04

!! I bet they'd not have a clue what sex actually was though (am hoping anyway!)

Original poster
bubble99 · 10/05/2005 23:12

HM. Isn't it yucky though. I expected to be fielding questions on this stuff when DS1 is 12, not seven.

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 10/05/2005 23:14

Totally yucky! I hope you do the decent thing and say "Ask your father"!!

giraffeski · 10/05/2005 23:18

Message withdrawn

giraffeski · 10/05/2005 23:19

Message withdrawn

joash · 10/05/2005 23:19

in answer to original question - DO NOT GIVE HIM HARIBO - THEY'RE MINE

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