Well, this is what BabelUselessFIsh translates it as:
On Wednesday were not Boehnchen much better, breathing fell it audibly more easily and also its eyes looked ill any longer. The lady doctor promised the fact that we could on Thursday home and removed the next to last cable from its body. Boehnchen away-put, said the infection better than many different it.
I was glad and out-slept and outside radiated spring. I decided to make for me the affectionate support on the baby station and to leave Boehnchen occasionally the sisters. I went joggen into close convenient park, the first time for months. After I had endured two days long on the chair beside Boehnchens bed and was already completely rigid, I enjoyed it the more traben by the morning spring sun. I undertook a small walk in the afternoon, got me a Cappuccino and sat down on a bank in the park. I admit it: It was liberating to be able to deliver without being Boehnchen - on the one hand the physical load (consisting of zappelnden five Kilos) and on the other hand the responsibility for a while.
In the evening Juergen and I went eating in the proximity of the hospital beautifully - the first time without Boehnchen and completely in peace. Nearly in peace. Because a little one probably always feels guilty as a nut/mother, if one leaves its child alone... and if one pushes the Schnuller for it into the mouth, so that it is calm... and if one wishes oneself the fact that it sleeps and in peace leaves one... and if the nice baby sister hangs a mobile to his bed, because "it looked the whole time so sadly to the wall"...
I felt guilty also, because Boehnchen became ill: Did I drag it too much by the area? Too few paid attention to it? Did I attract it too thinly? Even if me in the hospital it were protested that it had not been my error - the verdict "Rabenmutter" sounds in my back of the head with everything also, which I do for me and not for him.
Despite illness Boehnchen continued to develop very. In the hospital it did not only pour its first tears, it has to smile also learned. If one bends oneself over it, or if he regards his mobile, one can now see that he is pleased. That does well! Its view fixes faces and articles, it keeps eye contact and reacts. Like that now a kind of communication with it is possible. At all Boehnchen me does not come absurd-proves any more before like a baby. So energetically, how he requires for his milk, so strongly, how he tries with his laugh ups to hold the bottle then it rabiat, how he pedal and point in such a way, how it can look - that is nevertheless no more baby! And a Boehnchen already not at all. Immediately it is called Frederik or Fred or Freddy, Erik, Richy or Rick... its name gives fortunately some.