How do I handle this? Other parents screaming at me in the park

[WideWebWitch]

Earlier this week on my way home from dropping at school I saw a child alone in the park. I asked him where his parents were and he shrugged. I asked him where he went to school and he shrugged, I asked him was he ok and did he want me to find his mum and he shrugged. I talked to him a bit more and checked he was ok. A woman passed and said 'don't worry about him, he always does this, his mum knows about it, he's here most nights too.' I said 'but he should be at school' she said 'no he shouldn't they know about him' and that was that. I talked to him for a few more minutes, there was NO adult around and then he walked off. A woman then came and shouted 'come here' to him a couple of minutes later and he went off with her. I recognised her from school and I didn't do anything else about it, as I decided after some thought that it was none of my business.

This morning his step father approached me in the park and told me I'd terrified him and it was none of my business, among other things. I said I was sorry but he was alone and I was worried about him. He is 7 apparently. I said I thought he was alone and was only concerned about him. He said I was lucky it was him, not the mother as she'd 'have killed me' Lucky old me hey? Then 2 women started shouting at me too and I had 3 people screaming at me in the park, near the school. I walked off in tears and a parent I know joined me shortly afterwards, having witnessed the end of this and walked home with me. I know they're worried I'm going to (or have) called social services from what he said 'this woman said you said you were going to call welfare' (I didn't, I said surely he should be at school) and I know they screamed because they felt threatened presumably but I feel really upset by this and tearful still. This happened at just gone 9am. What should I do? Options are:

Nothing, hope it blows over. Half term next week so I won't see any of them for a bit
Write a note saying I'm sorry they thoguht I was interferring but I was only trying to help but won't in future
Tell the school just in case anything else happens?

The other parent is a father and has offered to walk to school with me this afternoon so I'm not alone and I think I'll make sure I'm not for the next few weeks. Any advice welcome, I feel really upset about this. Inordinately, but it was SO aggressive and it scared me. I feel like a wimp.

poor you www. all you did was be a concerned human being. for all you knew anything could have happened preceding him being all alone in the park- all you did was what we all should do. please try not to be upset and please don't stop being a good person

And don't feel you were interfering, you weren't - you were showing concern for a child, which is what decent people do.

You've got nothing to apologise for or feel guilty about.

Poor You WWW

I'm trying to put myself in your shoes

Firstly, if I saw a 7 year old alone in the park I would have done exactly what you did ... exactly .. I would be proud to count you as a real life friend and would hope that anyone would do exactly the same.

Secondly .. I think the parents had a fear response and then the pack mentality took over (like enid says)

As for what I would do next .. what I would actually do is tell as many of my friends as possible what happened and then probably glare daggers at the parents (or ignore them in future).. what I would hope is that one of my friends might approach them and tell them off on my behalf

Not sure I'd involve the school or anyone official (although might tell the class teacher, but not in an official capacity).. I would be worried about it escalating or contiunuing

But I would like to think I'd say hang it all its the kid that matters and tell the school ... because it is the kid that matters .. .poor thing just don't think I'd be brave enough

Do not expect an apology .. you deserve one .. but I doubt you'd get one

YOU DID THE RIGHT THING THOUGH >> DON'T LET THE IDIOTS UPSET YOU

I really admire you for doing this www. You should feel proud of yourself, not a wimp - wish more people were prepared to get involved like this. It's so depressing isn't it that someone could see this as interfering rather than being a caring and socially responsible adult!

I'd also be inclined to leave it too now, unless you get more abusive and threatening behaviour. If that happened I would report it to police and let the school know too.

You are all lovely. I have stopped crying. Dp is coming home at lunchtime to give me a hug, one of my lovely friends is coming for tea with her children and it's the weekend with half term next week so I am going to try to just forget about these horrible people. Thank you so much.

You did absolutely the right thing, as everyone else has said. Enjoy your hug, your half-term and keep focussing on the possibility that just by mentioning this to this poor child's "family", you might have done him a big favour. Good for you WWW I wish there were more like you around.

You are lovely, www, and not a wimp (a wimp would not have said anything, ie me probably), please do be proud of yourself. Hope you have a really nice weekend and halfterm.

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oh you poor love, what an awful start to the day. You were absolutely right in everything that you did.

Three cheers for the very nice man!!

Let us know how you go on at school - hope everything is ok, I'm glad you have someone to go with

WWW - how awful for you - that is what you get for showing concern. IMO you did the right thing and this should not put you off helping people in the future - this is very unusual. If the family are so threatening you would probably be better staying out of it as it may come back on you if they are contacted by the school or social services. Difficult one.

You poor thing what a horrible experience for you, no wonder you're upset. Just fwiw, any decent parent would have been utterlly grateful that you stopped and were concerned about their boy, and I agree with the others that I would expect school and ss know all about him.
So I wouldn't do anything else, but do feel proud of yourself for what you did.
Glad you're feeling a bit better now.

Dont worry too much. Its very upsetting at the time I know.They are the ones with the problem, not you. They sound like a bunch of gypos and not worth the time of day. If there are any further threats then contact the police. Wouldnt be surprised if they already know the family, bet they do. They are just cheap low down scum who are defensive and aggressive and know no other way. Ignore. But if any further incidents with threats or anything then call the police straight away. good luck.

Everyone else has said what I wanted to say but just wanted to add that I would have done exactly the same (including bursting into tears) but you were so in the right. Children go missing and are abused all the time. Some people are such tossers . Hope you feel better soon xx

Oh you poor thing. It makes me mad when the good guys (i.e. you) get treated like this. I think you acted entirely correctly, and it probably would be worth speaking to the school. A 7 year old shouldn't be out on their own like that imo. Definitely a good idea to have someone to walk to school with for the next few days.

(((hug)))) - give me a ring if you want a chat!

www - you poor thing, I would be just as upset. Nothing to add to what everyone else has said - you did the right thing and were just unfortunate that it brought you into direct contact with such dreadful people

I wouldn't do anything else - but if they come near you again (and do walk with this Dad for a while, please) you must call the Police. What horrible, horrible people.

Poor you. I think you did the right thing by speaking to the boy. From what the step-dad said, it sounds to me like they've wound themselves up because they are worried that you will phone social services, and the best form of defence is attack. If they have a genuine reason for him not being at school they wouldn't be worried and any "normal" parent would be grateful to have someone like you looking out for their child. It's awful and I would probably be reacting like you too, so have a {{{hug}}} for when your dh goes back to work.

www
Tell the school - and tell the head or deputy if you can. Schools take on a lot of pastoral responsibility for their children, and are probably trying to help this boy already. It sounds as though he needs it. You did the right thing in checking up on him - and got blamed for it. It was still the right thing to do. Horrible for you, but we are all proud of you.

WWW this is truely awful - some people just don't deserve to have children.
If i were you i would speak with the school - just make them aware of what has happened, as no doubt EWOs are already involved. Also for you sons sake - they can perhaps keep an eye out for him, incase there are any problems in school. And also, if any thing further happens, the school will be "witness" to the original problem. Try and have a good half term!

I don't want to speak to the school in case it leads to any further action on their part which will enrage these people further. I just want the parents to leave me alone. Dp just went back to work and he reckons they will leave me alone now since they've said their piece. Poor boy, living with people like this, he clearly isn't their primary concern.

Gosh poor you

They are clearly trying to intimidate you into keeping out of their business because they are in the wrong and have reacted in a guilty and very aggressive way and tried to turn the focus of attention onto you.

I should stick with the dad that has offered to walk that way with you again, but if they have another go, start mentioning the police to them and/or social services and act on it. They won't like that, but you've done nothing wrong. They on the other hand may have some explaining to do. Also, yes I would have a quiet word with the school, but ask to be kept out of it personally because they are behaving in an unstable way and you were intimidated.

I'm not surprised how much this has upset you though - I would be shaking! Some people seem to employ this tactic more and more these days (often over trivial things too, not that this was, of course) and are on such a short fuse.

I think you did the right thing by approaching the child, its the natural thing to do. If my child was out alone, I would hope someone would be kind enough to help them. (not that I would let them out alone)

If I were in your shoes, I would leave it as it is at the moment. If the parents say or do anything else to you, then I would report it to the school. If the school decide to inform SS, thats the parents tough luck. They can't bully people, they were in the wrong and they should just accept that. If they attempt to carry it on, then they will have to suffer the consequences.