Sister went nuts!

[Marei]

What would you do?
My sister and I both have disability keys, there different at the top.
Anyway I had borrowed hers when out as I had left mine at home, as I swapped handbags. Last night she appeared at my home for her key,and I gave it to her, then 5 mins later I received a text stating it wasn't her key!
Then she came into my home, asked to see my key and demanding it was her key and I had swapped it. (This sound pettie i know)
But I asurred her it was her key and produced mine from my other handbag, proving mine was in my other bag, and she went nuts demanding, shouting, with my 10 year old by my side, that that was her key and I must have "swapped it"
I was really angry by this,gave her MY key, to get her out my home, and have blocked her from contacting me. This isn't the first nasty incident shes done to me. Any thoughts??

She hasn't mentioned any volatility on her part. Blocking her was a reasonable approach to someone who acted they way they did.

Thoughts?

It’s really shitty that two sisters both have a disability that qualified them for a disability key.

It’s also weird. In my country anyone is allowed to use the disabled toilets. Many places don’t limit the disabled toilets to just disabled people.

It's better than having them filled with people injecting drugs, pissing all over the seat and floor or occupying it because they can't be arsed to walk another twenty foot to the normal toilets.

my thoughts are for your DD.

however, playing devils advocate did you take her key without her knowing? I know you need it, but this would have annoyed me slightly and may have put her in a bad mood as maybe she needed it? I think it would have been polite you returned the key to her immediately and not her collect it? Something along these lines may help prevent the fallout.

You don’t need to qualify for one.
Anyone can buy one online.
Im not suggesting the OP and her sister don’t need them, but it’s not like there’s a test.

You don't have to have a close relationship with her just because she's your sister. She likes to intimidate and bully you which is bad enough, but she did it in front of your dc. You don't want your dc growing up believing that this is the way family members treat each other.

If you had a friend who treated you in that way, you'd soon get shot of them out of your life, because nobody needs friends like that.

I'd start avoiding her as much as possible if I were you.

Pathetic

Think you both need to grow up to be honest. And buy yourself spare radar keys to stop this daft nonesence happening again

She is 40. This is what I'm thinking. Thank you for this! At last a helpful person. She had epilepsy for 10 years, and has been on many different meds over the years. Im going to look into this more. Thank you.
I will eventually speak with her and discuss this. But not at the moment. Im just really hurt the way she has treated me. Thank you x

Both of you just grow up a bit.
If she annoyed you then don't contact her for a bit and keep your distance

It is odd behaviour on her part. However you need to relax a bit about it. It doesn’t actually matter which key is whose, as they both do the same thing. You defending ‘your property’ and your dignity is equally odd, from my perspective.

Had my sis turned up angrily because I had forgotten to return her key, I’d have apologised and given her the key. When she fussed it was the wrong one, I’d have said, ‘Oh, I thought it was the other way round. Here you go.’.

No drama for your DD to witness.

She sounds confused so this may be an early symptom, rage is a symptom as well. Can you bring it up with her doctor so they are aware? If it’s dementia then it’s not her fault, but still it’s a hard situation to be in x

True but if my DS had gone off on one and started yelling at me I’d be wondering what on earth was going on.

Like a RADAR key? I have one from my IBD nurse because I have Crohn’s. I also got a smaller one from Amazon because the official RADAR ones are huuuge.

This is such a non issue. I wouldn’t care which key I used as long as it opened a door if I was in a prickle.

What strange behaviour! I couldn’t be arsed with this tbh. Just give the key back and move on? Not worth getting worked up over.

Epilepsy and epilepsy meds are associated with higher dementia risk.

I think you need a different attitude with things like this. Throwing a tantrum because of two keys that open exactly the same doors is clearly NOT RATIONAL. The rational viewpoint is "Oh, well, no harm done". Escalating the tantrum because you think your key was the other key, even though the other key doesn't look like yours is WILDLY IRRATIONAL. You'd expect this from a toddler, not an adult or even a school-age child.

Do you see, there's absolutely no point arguing with that amount of irrational? Something's wrong with her. She's reasoning like a toddler, with her emotions and no logic whatsoever. As I'm sure you know, a toddler tantrum can't be reasoned with, you'd drive yourself mad before the kid grew out of them. Even if they're absolutely furious that you cutted up their pear, you just do your best to make them feel everything's okay.

So - don't bother reasoning with unreasonable, it's a waste of effort and makes you go all blotchy. Don't bother blocking the unreasonable one, it's pointless and won't do anything to stop the tantrums. Just let her keep the darn key, you've got one anyway. If she is getting dementia, she's probably scared and confused, so that's another reason to be patient with her.

THANK YOU FOR THIS! It's really put me at ease. I can't keep putting myself out there to be walked over. I don't care what key I have,I'm just gonna step back and leave it be. There is proof the key is mine, but she is still doing intentional other things that have hurt me. So I need to move on. Thank you .