Am I Dirty?

[DirtyGirl]

Not as exciting as the title suggests, I'm afraid, but wanted to get your advice/ views on this...
I like to think I keep my family reasonably clean and healthy, but think I am realistic, and am not a 'laundry fanatic' - particularly since dh & I both work full time and we have a toddler and a baby.
Anyway, had a 'debate' with dh the other day, when I asked him whether he really needed to put his shirts into the laundry after just wearing for one day.
I should point out that we're talking about the thick, checked,Timberland-type heavy cotton sort, which he always wears open-necked with a white T shirt underneath (his company has a casual dress policy)
Well basically his response made me feel as if I was being accused of being a slovenly bitch who didn't wash....
My other general principles include:

• only wash tops/shirts/jumpers (when worn over T-shirts etc) after 2-3 wears, or if visibly dirty/ smell of food/smoke etc
• kids PJs/babygros (bedtime) get worn for 3-4 nights(unless accidents occur)
• kids trousers worn twice (unless visibily dirty, or wet etc)
• kids jumpers/tops - changed daily (always dirty/messy)
• all underwear/ socks changed daily

Is this unreasonable? Am I dirty?
(Have changed my name in case the verdict is a resounding YES, in which case I can safely skulk away in shame..)
P.S. Seemed an appropriate thread, given Persil's sponsorship of Mumsnet?

baths: most nights, but depends on visible signs of dirt/paint on dd and how dry her skin is - she occasionally has eczema. with regards to washing clothes, it has to be only when you can see the muck unless it's underwear

OK, how often do you change sheets on your own bed? And how often would they be changed if it was up to your husband?

bath every night? how would that work?

actually as we have no central heating and the bathroom is too cold I've been avoiding baths for dd (good rub down with a flannel instead). But I was quite mortified to realise that what with one thing and another, she had managed to go 2 weeks without a bath until last night. Is that a record?

Dirtygirl - sounds just like our household. dh wears his shirts 2 days running with T-shirt on underneath. If your body is clean then your clothes won't get dirty. I always use a lot less powder than it says on the packet too.

Lucy123 - just noticed your post. We are in the same boat - don't have central heating. I sometimes bath baby in front of the stove - very old fashioned! We do have a shower for ds and the heater is put on just before to heat the room a little. Flannels and little pots of water are used a lot though. Don't have a bath - I go to my parents occasionally. I am sure we all worry too much - we all bath/shower more than we used to and people certainly never died of a bit of dirt!

Thank goodness for Mumsnet ! I too was feeling like a dirty mare as my cleaner recently asked me if I ever changed my bedlinen !! Hmmmm - well yes, but only if it's been on a fortnight or smells !!! Life's too short !

Likewise towels - I try to remember to change them every week - but that's often a fortnightly event too !

I have a dear friend who has just spent an absolute fortune on new linen and towels because her fastidious mother will not use the same towel twice and insists on clean bed linen every night !! The same woman is on prozac though !

I do bath dd every day unless she is too tired for a bath - as occassionally happens ! She has totally clean day clothes every day, but PJs last 3 nights unless a spillage occurs !

Dh and I have clean undies and tops every day (except for bra - I only have 3 as well !!) but do wear the same trousers (not as each other !) for as long as respectable !

Isn't it awful how other people make us feel dirty ! My parents are still on a weekly bath cycle and think we are wasteful for showering every day ! When I was a teenager I wasn't allowed to shower every day nor was I allowed a clean shirt and pants every day ! Too much washing !!!

I am horrified at myself - I've just read the entire thread, and found it fascinating. What is my life coming to?!

DirtyGirl

If only all the washing in my house got that done so often.

You do it more than often enough by my standards.

scatterbrain - you made me laugh.

we used to take in foreign students and one time a lad presented his towel on the first morning for washing. It was all I could do not to laugh in his face (I put it on the radiator and then back in his room - he got the message)

Eulalia you poor thing. Our situation is not that bad since we live in Spain (cold at night but never below freezing). Must get a plastic bath.

DirtyGirl, you are doing enough washing without having to wash his shirts after one wearing. But I am slightly envious, my dh's shirts are usually disgusting by the time they find their way to the basket and he only showers about once a week. I wish he were a little cleaner ...
Have to confess that I wore the same pair of jeans every day for at least a week recently as couldn't find time to do ironing.

Scatterbrain - every two weeks! I'm lucky if I get round to it every 2 months (I remember when I was asked to go back to the next parentcraft class in our area after I'd had dd and I described how I leaked a lot of milk, and some blood, and they said what hard work it must be changing the bedding all the time. I coughed. I should mention I have changed it since as dd is now 14 months! ).

We would NEVER change the bedding if it was down to dh as putting the duvet in the duvet cover is his absoluted most hated task of all. I still make him help, though.

what a great thread....my washing piles always seem to take over my bedroom and im going by the same standards as the rest ,although my dp's shirts are washed after one wearing but hes a despatch manager and lugs boxes all day so they do get grubby.dds clothes get washed when they are marked but if not she gets 2 wears out of them.pjs i change every other night as are her vests.the only thing thats changed on a daily basis other than aforementioned shirts is underwear.although bras last a good few days.
as we have no central heating in the winter we only bath dd once a week unless shes really dirty as for me i couldnt live without my nightly soak,dp every other night at least.
sadly towels are neglected in my house their washed every two -three weeks and bed linen about the same unless there really dirty.

if my dp starts complaining about having no clean clothes then i tell him to do his own -that usually shuts him up!

Cor, you don't seem to have many bras you lot: I reckon I have about 20, and about 30 pairs of knickers so if the washing doesn't get done for 2 weeks I've still got clean pants. Jeans and skirts I'd wear until they looked and/or smelled dirty, tops I wear several times. Sheets stay on for weeks, towels til they smell and pyjamas about a week. Or two. Fascinating stuff

As with the rest of the girls my habits are almost exactly the same as yours Dirtygirl - and dh's almost exactly like your dh's - luckily he is obssessed with washing and does it all himself and even resents me for 'helping' him sometimes as I don't boil wash enough things for him!
We have reached a reasonably amical agreement about everything of mine going on minimum wash/woolens cycle that way I don't have to worry about what might happen to it at 60o!
Apparently even as a student he wore a pair of jeans once and then washed them - I have stopped pointing out that they are still CLEAN and we've agreed to differ !!!

well, www, I've got a totally different picture of you now, not only glamourous but loaded (well maybe not any more after buying all that underwear).

I'm not going to say how often our bed linen gets changed, as I would be drummed out of this site in shame! I rarely buy any item of clothing that needs ironing, and ds does his own (only because he likes his sleeves ironed just so, and I give them tramlines!)

Ds's tops get two wears if no food has attached itself, and wears trousers for a few days. Dh wears t-shirts at least twice, but never smells. He is the only man I know who never sweats. I think that I sweat more than him! I have loads of bras and knickers, but they have not matched since before ds (I can't wear the matching ones since my boobs headed south ). No grey ones, as they are usually black. I NEVER wear white, as I am a clumsy pup.

Having just completed 6 loads of washing in the past 24 hours, which amounts to our clothes-use in the past week, I guess everything must go in the wash after just a single wear. But Dirtygirl, this sounds reasonable to me too. I've been trying to persuade dh to wear his work shirts for 2days as he's an anaesthetist and only wears his in the car, to and from work, and the occasional ward round, as he changes into theatre greens/blues.
I'm just thankful that someone else does the ironing.

Oh, the bed linen and towel discussion makes me feel so much better and sooo normal!! My mum used to find the time to change them every week when I was at home.

Oh god, I feel awful. Pyjamas get changed once a week with the bedlinen.... well okay, sometimes the bedlinen doesn't get done until the week after, but I do make an effort to remember to change the pyjamas.... honest.

You lot make me feel as if I have an obsessive compulsive disorder as I change our sheets twice a week and in the summer they are changed every other day. I just love fresh sheets! ( I do have someone to do it though) and it's really quick to iron them on a press.

I often think that we are either too clean or too dirty, as either we put everything in the basket as soon as it's taken off, or we are so dirty everything needs to be washed even though only worn once. I suppose I blame myself as I trained DD and DS to put their washing in their baskets from about 2 years old!!

DD and Ds only get their sheets done once a week as they have to do their own, unless the au pair can manage to find the way to their beds through the towels left on the floor. That's why I have a towel wash every day, left in a stinking heap on the floor, its easier to stick them in the machine and then tumble dry them, I never ever hang washing out either, if I did it would still be there a year later, well has been known to be on the line for 2 weeks once!

This is so great, thought i was the only mother on earth who didn't bathe DD every night, thus kept quiet about it. She just doesn't get dirty apart from hands/bum obviously & that gets cleaned so often she hardly needs a bath.
Washing wise, I'm the same as everyone else it seems, do what needs doing, seems sensible to me.

Bedding once a fortnight (occasionally 3 weeks), towels twice a week or they just don't come clean (obvious remedy is to to buy darker towels...), underwear for all daily, DS's pjs every other day (ish), socks daily, all DS's clothes daily, DH/my work tops daily, casual tops after 2/3 wears, jeans probably after more but an evening wear can't count the same as a full day! If it wasn't for Alibubbles I'd be feeling quite clean!! Also the thing that sold my washing machine to me was that it has a handwash cycle and I've had it over a year and not handwashed anything since.

I'm as schizophrenic as anyone. Mine & kids underwear daily. DH underwear I leave to him - hence, not very often.
I have a clean t-shirt on every day, as I can smell the underarms, but jumpers I make last 2/3/4 days. DS can go for days in outer clothes, as he is very careful, but if he's been in the garden, can go through 2 or 3 changes a day.
I bath them every other night, but sometimes longer.
pjs once or twice a week
I always forget to change bedding, so usually more than a fortnight, unless there has been a milk or wee spillage, whereupon they are changed at once. Towels once a week, if I remember.
I only have 3 comfy bras, but wash them every couple of days. I have about 43 uncomfy bra-mistakes, which never get worn.
What a thread!

Dirygirl, from where I'm standing, be grateful you have a man who's too clean rather than the opposite. Mine's a farmer and has to be dragged kicking and screaming into the bath. He'll only change his work clothes when their smell precedes him by five minutes.
We have arguments about it ALL THE TIME.
Want to swap?