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Original poster

I'm about to turn 40 but look very young

114 replies

motherhood2019 · 11/03/2024 11:24

I'm about to turn 40 but I feel embarrassed to tell anyone as I look very young. I have always looked young so I'm fed up of the responses like "you don't look it", "I can't believe that" etc. They think they're being flattering but it really gets me down. I have a small face and generally petite. Any tips or advice?

OP posts:
DickEmery · 12/03/2024 01:42

a small face and generally petite. Any tips

Like Michael Keaton at the end of Beetlejuice or like Warwick Davies? Different advice applies.

Maireas · 12/03/2024 07:27

To answer your question, OP - just stop telling people your age.

betterangels · 12/03/2024 07:31

Silverumbrella · 11/03/2024 11:42

Sane happened to me. Always told I looked younger in my 20’s and 30’s then got to 45 and perimenopause hit!

Show quote history

Same. Enjoy it while it lasts, OP.

morecoffeeJD · 19/03/2024 16:22

SpringtimeAtLast · 11/03/2024 11:30

I get this. People used to tell me I had “a lovely figure” but she’s actually really underweight and struggling to gain, and I just want them to NOT comment. But they mean it very kindly and to be flattering, so you can only smile and change the subject I think.

You wouldn’t go up to someone and say, “gosh you’re only 40?! I would’ve guessed you’re 50! Incredible!” Or “you’re looking great - have you put on weight, you look so much chubbier than when I last ran into you!”

In the best possible way you have to remember people admire slim, youthful looks. Smile and nod and plan a MASSIVE celebration for your 40th!

It is as if I wrote this! I've been experiencing this my entire life and it is nothing short of impossible to explain my perspective, no one understands. Also trying to gain weight ever since I can remember. Same comments, sorry - compliments. My point is - WHY on earth would you comment on the physical appearance of someone you literally just met? If they are oh so skinny or look young? Also, I don't even know how many times I heard: You are so tall. Thank you, this is something I never noticed, and no one has ever pointed it out.

HedgehogCabinFan · 29/03/2024 16:44

SleeplessSince03 · 11/03/2024 18:39

There’s no one we all know, like celebs, that actually look more than about 5-8 years younger than they are, but so many mumsnetters say they look 20+ years younger. Yeah right. 🤔

I think most people look their age +/- a few years.

Some people are deluded or believe others when they are being kind or just making conversation when they say ‘you don’t look old enough’.

My son works part time in a supermarket, he’s crap at judging ages so when selling alcohol, he says he ends up asking most people for ID.

I think most people think they look young for their age in the same way most drivers think they are great drivers!

StasisMom · 01/04/2024 19:30

DickEmery · 12/03/2024 01:42

a small face and generally petite. Any tips

Like Michael Keaton at the end of Beetlejuice or like Warwick Davies? Different advice applies.

Grin
RickyGervaislovesdogs · 01/04/2024 19:32

Make the most of it! It doesn’t last.

minthybobs · 01/04/2024 19:40

I hear you OP and people are just jealous.

I turned 94 last week and constantly get mistaken for being 17. It’s incredibly frustrating and they argue with me when out with my grandchildren, telling them I must be their sister. It’s so embarrassing and utterly exhausting having to then tell them my skincare secrets (olive oil, a wire wool brush, and ponds cold cream btw).

My advice is ignore the haters. They’re just jealous of us!

AquaBee · 05/04/2024 13:18

My colleague gets the same. She looks around 19 and is your age. Doesn't help that she has no kids and still lives at home. I have seen her be treated like some freak like figure because of it. No advice but she could relate to all that you said.

AquaBee · 06/04/2024 15:38

Women can look more than a decade younger actually. Colleague is proof of that. It annoys me when people say it could never happen. I am not even the young looking one and I see it happen. Looking at her you would never in a million years put her at 30 let alone 40

Shetlands · 06/04/2024 15:49

Enjoy it while it lasts. It's better being given the over 60s 'Monday discount' at the garden centre without being asked your age. 😭

crystal1983 · 06/04/2024 16:13

This is me too! I turned 40 in September. But no one believes it as I look about 5 years younger

i usually make a joke of it and say yep it’s my youthful good looks!

Rainydayinlondon · 06/04/2024 16:28

kitsuneghost · 11/03/2024 15:58

Don't worry you are probably one of these people who it all hits at once
I was one of those people it hit all at once.

Sitting there at 42, looking about 30. Woke up at 43 looking about 50

Haha yes. I actually looked “pretty” at 40

At 45 looked good “for my age”
Looked ok at 50 ( could pass for 45) and now in mid fifties it’s all going awol

TinkerTiger · 06/04/2024 16:47

Ok.

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