Please can I have your top tips for not taking life too seriously? What do you do that stops you getting serious and helps with happiness?

[WideWebWitch]

I am aware that one of my faults is that I can take life a bit too seriously. I do have a sense of humour, definitely, and I can say "fk it" and have blow outs involving skiiving off work/staying up late and stuff like that but I am aware that sometimes I need to lighten up and remind myself that life is supposed to be fun too.

What do you do to have fun and if you are similar, how do you stop yourself taking it all too seriously?

(I have mega stressful commute atm, which isn't helping, but even without that I know I sometimes can feel humourless.)

Any and all suggestions welcomed, thanks.

Yes - I can understand that you like to have something else lined up - but that could be done reasonably quickly?

Have you sent your request to HR as well as your line manager - as there is a statutory time limit that they have to stick to, in responding to you. I find that HR people are aware of this but line people not so much.

A day working from home would break the back of things for you - so I really, really hope you get sorted out soon!

I had a look at the 'being good' thread because it is nagging at me to join you all I noticed you go through Euston on your commute. I work right next to the station - so if you ever fancy a coffee/wine then just let me know

Soapbox, I'm a contractor so no HR or anything. I think I know where you work, I look longingly at the building sometimes when I get a cab and wish I didn't have to go any further! I may well take you up on that

Thanks everyone for lovely suggestions.

And boss Really doesn't want me to go, she's said so so she does need to come up with the goods, frankly!

LOL didn't realise you were on the tube, you really would amuse your fellow commuters.

Contractors have HR needs too WWW!

I'm no expert but I thought that contractors had pretty much similar rights to employees these days. Our HR dept. certainly are very involved with contractors.

Finds likeminds wherever you go. Especially at work when so many people do take their jobs seriously . You need to constantly have a "take the piss" head on (in your head, not out loud!) at the utter nonsense that goes on in workplaces. Step back; it's all just a game and you're acting at work, it's not you. Well, that's how I cope when madness descends (as is now happening in my workplace)

no matter what life chucks at you there is always something to smile about, sometimes you can't see the rainbow cos you are so focused on the clouds, or is that just me there are always people in a worse situation then ourselves thou sometimes it is hard to see that. i hope you get something resolved for the work situation.

The best bits of advice I've found have helped me become more relaxed and less serious over the years are:

Don't sweat the small stuff. I work long hours and have had to adopt this attitude to survive.

When you find yourself worrying or getting stressed about something, ask yourself if worrying/stressing will actually help the situation or make it better. If the answer is 'no', then stop worrying. I spend a lot of time in my car, and have come to realise that getting stressed about being stuck in a jam only makes the situation worse if that makes sense.

Focus on the immediate present more, rather than thinking about things that have already happened or that may happen in the future. I realised this when I found myself dwelling and carrying over stress from things that had happened earlier, like being annoyed all day because of something that happened in the morning.

I don't know if these things will help www, but they helped me and have slowly become more automatic for me to do too.

Thank you everyone, some fantastic suggestions here.

Onlyjoking I am humbled that you've posted and very grateful, thank you. I hope you're doing everything you can to look after yourself as well as Steve.

the best bit of advice not that i have been able to follow it is that that a lot of the things that we stress about never happen thou it doesn't stop me stressing.
you are very kind WWW

If you commute, it's always fun to be 'the person who talks to strangers'. Flirt with them, it's funny. They try really hard to crawl into their clothes to hide!

Seriously, doing something very silly is good. I'm the person in Sainsburys riding the trolley while yelling 'weeeeeaaaah' while five months pregnant and with a toddler in toe (she's mortified, she never gets to have a tantrum because she doesn't want to draw any more attention to us!)

I just downloaded "word up" onto my Ipod for this very reason. Ditto the music suggestion and go groovy.

Loud music, mad dancing. My kitchen overlooks a law firm and I lOVE bopping round the kitchen with the three year old while the lawyers are stuck in front of their screens till all hours .
Very tempted to hang a banner out of the window saying 'GO HOME'.

four HOURS commuting

wow.

hate to suggest it but how much of your journey is tube time? could you possibly replace it or some of it with bike time? although cycling can feel hard in prospect, I have always found that even when clinically depressed, I am OK and even happy when actually moving on a bike. check out these electric babies

Life is short, It's not worth getting stressed what's the worst that could happen? I don't work atm but was stressed the other day and put on some good music I liked at full blast and danced with my children whilst my 9 week old looked laughing it was truly lovely and I thought this is one of these moments my older children will remember and so will I. If you fuck up in work so what? If the commute is a PITA so what? I always think about how I will be remembered when I die and you know what work doesn't feature at all!

I remember when my mum was on her deathbed and she worried about what she'd achieved (she was a PA qite stressed for years) then she looked at me and I smiled and she said 'of course you are what I have achieved.' Puts things into perspective somewhat.

Don't worry too much about not being able to have fun. Your life atm is fairly crap and doesn't leave a lot of time for fun, but thta doesn't mean that you would be ncapable of having it if you were given the time and space. So don't go down that spiral of thinking that there's something wrong with you because you can't enjoy yourself (she says with bitter experience)

Have you tried the mortgage pig idea - it's on motley fool I think, and you have a big pig in the kitchen into which you out all the money you are saving/earning by doing this horrid commute (obv. you'd have to put IOU's or bank statements rather than the cash) then you can actually focus on the fun thing that you are going to get eventually

Things that work for me:
Body brushing every morning. Yes I know it's just one more thing to add into your hectic schedule, but it really does wake me up, and allows me 2 minutes of peaceful routine calming action before I have to face the day.
A long lie in on Saturday. Dh brings me poached eggs on toast, I watch some TV and at about 10 the kids come up and I actuially want to play with them.
I am also trying (though often forget) to think of 3 good things about each day when I'm in bed at the end of it. So at least I go to sleep reflecting well rather than badly. I started writing them down but that fizzled out very quickly and then the blank pages were looking at me accusingly, but maybe you could work that into your homeward train journey. MAybe even add the things that have made your day crap - at leats if you write them down you'll realise that you have real reasons to be knackered and humourless.

I sit down and listen to a couple of Radiohead albums all the way through.

After that just about anything is cheery by comparison...

i download some clips of Gordon Brown moving his lips from YouTube.

always makes me laugh.

or of Britney Spears, trying to sing.

WWW - my commute is not quite as bad as yours (although we travel the same route!) but I agree, it does seem grim and unbearable some days. The journey home seems to take forever. One thing I have found which helps is to read on the train, but absolutely nothing "heavy" (Gunter Grass makes the journey even longer!) - something you can get into quickly and preferably something funny. It makes the commute less of a drag.

I also take the bus rather than the tube in the mornings as it's more pleasant. The route I take takes me past where my great grandmother used to live (Holborn) which also provokes happy memories from early childhood.

Happy to join you for a drink at Euston or in MK.

We have taken to doing a very silly thing recently, as a reaction to mucho stress.
When DH is due home, the kids line up the Tra La La song on YouTube (you know it, it's the Banana Splits theme, one banana two banana three banana four), and when he comes through the door, they hit play.
It's such a soppy song that it can't help make you smile, we all jig about a bit and sing it loudly, then we sit down to eat.
I know YouTube is guilty of many a misdemeanor and I personally believe every item should be monitored before it's allowed on, but it does have it's good points.
It has become a sort-of safety valve for our family - OK everyone, we're all home safely, the front door is closed, leave the day behind.

Oh, yes - dancing always brilliant for stress relief and overall happiness.