Friend does something dangerous, what do I say?

[LollipopChaos]

I go out occasionally with a friend who I like very dearly. We're both nearly 50. However she has this habit which scares me a bit. She doesn't drive so I always drive. But whenever we arrive at our destination she swings passenger door of car open to get out whilst the car is still moving to park up. It means that I have to finish driving with the door wide open to park properly. This puts extra stress on me to nail parking the car in a space in one attempt.

I feel it would be telling her off to say don't do it, but I just find it dangerous, not to mention the car starts beeping like crazy as a warning that the door is open!

How can I politely advise my friend to remain calm in seat with belt on until the car has come to a complete stop and the handbrake is safely on?

Child lock. New car, new features. 🙂

"Oy, friend, pack it in. The house/park/beach/whatever isn't going anywhere."

"If you do that again you'll have to ride in the back next time".

Has she always been this impatient? Unusual at 50. I'm guessing she doesn't have kids???

I will investigate door features to check again.

Yes she has a couple of kids who are grown up now.

She is a lovely friend, very calm and patient with everything, it's just this which I find odd. I am wondering if she had a bad experience in a car years ago hence the anxiety to get out asap.

I think @AlwaysFreezing's suggestion is a good one. although I don't understand why you don't just say something to her. Non drivers know perfectly well that you don't open the door of a moving car.

Just tell her it isn't safe and it affects your insurance is anything untoward happens.

Just tell, not ask, her to stop doing this.

Why don’t you just ask her why she does it? Not in the moment, but afterwards.

I don’t think you should be putting up with it. As the driver it’s your responsibility if anything happens.

And not to be morbid but one of my neighbours was killed this way some years ago. She got half way out of the car thinking it was stopped, and her husbands foot slipped so the car lurched. She fell under the wheel. This was on their own driveway.

You don't need to drive to know that. You just need to be over the age of 8. That's why we have child locks. Just tell her.

You are the driver so I don't think you have any choice you have to say something I am guessing also though the police could pull you over for it? But regardless you need it to stop

Thank you guys, I will definitely say something for all future trips. My mouth will be open and ready as this behaviour cannot continue. She is just a lovely friend and wonderful company, but I need to be honest.

Has she got some learning difficulties? I cannot get my head around a) why she would do this and b) why you haven’t nipped it in the bud? If I was driving and my friend did this I’d have probably shouted “what the fuck are you doing?”

There's no way of locking her in. Front doors can always be opened from the inside when the ignition key is in regardless of them being 'locked'. That just stops them being opened from the outside.

Have you not got a childproof lock switch to lock her door?

I think there's anxiety with cars, hence why she doesn't drive, so maybe would explain wanting to open door to get out at earliest opportunity.

Grateful for responses as sound like this is unique and no one else has come across it. I will emphasis how dangerous it is and ask her to close the door whilst I park up last couple of feet.

Tell her she has to sit in the back because you didn’t not have child locks in the front 😂

What an odd sounding friendship - how can you feel unable to say something about this to a good friend who’s apparently so calm and lovely?

I agree.
I think the OP should tell her passenger before she gets in the car not to do this.

Talk to her the moment she gets in your car, before you even leave. Someone up thread said my suggestion was "too airstewardessy" - I agree....... but some people need that level of detailed directness (ie not just the sweary suggestions but the details plus firmness) Either she agrees to what you ask or you wont give her a lift.

Trying to jump out of a moving vehicle isn’t going to help her car anxiety

You're not a fucking labrador. Stay there till I get parked, you daft eejit.

Would you ever consider a gentle shove? She might learn her lesson...

I am kidding.

I'm wondering if she's just a bit impulsive...
When we return to the car she's always first before I have a chance to get my keys out... and she yanks the passenger door handle multiple times until it opens. Never waits for the obvious click that now yes the car door is unlocked.

In my old car she actually busted the boot lock even when I said as we approached with shopping bags that it only opens with the key (it was broken slightly)... but sadly we got there and she started pressing and forcing to open it and it totally busted.

Impulsive or not, she is putting you in a difficult position because the driver is the one responsible for passengers wearing seatbelts while the car is moving. If she's jumping out the door, I'm assuming she's had to release her seatbelt. Maybe you could just explain at the start of the journey next time? You're very kind to do all the driving. I hope you enjoy your trips. Safety first!

Thank you, she's a good passenger until the point we pull into the car parking space! I find it surprising that at her age she doesn't know better.

Just say

wtf are you doing, shut the door?

I'm wondering if she's just a bit impulsive...

Stop making excuses for her stupid behaviour. She is an adult ans should behave like one. She needs to be challenged.

This!! Who on earth does this?! Bellend.

How can you park with the door wide open? Surely you’ll hit the cars beside you