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Original poster

holding back on playstation

31 replies

arizona · 11/12/2004 20:56

My 6 year old ds really wants one and I'm saying no because I want him to enjoy more traditional toys and learn to love reading. How long have others held out for? Ideally I'd never have one. I hate the way children become so obsessed with them. Am I being unrealistic?

OP posts:

hercyulelog · 11/12/2004 21:28

I would wait for a bit longer. Ds (8) han an xbox but is only allowed on it at weekends for short periods. He understands why and it's never been a problem.

einRosentsprungen · 11/12/2004 21:38

My ds1 is 7.5 and we're still holding out; he doesn't seem that bothered by it. I know he has the personality type to be completely obsessed by it to the exclusion of all else, and I also think most of the games are far too violent.

When he begs us for one (which might be tomorrow might be months or years yet), we will probably get one, but with strict limits/guidelines on usage as hercyulelog suggests.

Atm he is a very keen reader - he reads for at least an hour every day, often more, and does lots of playing, drawing, and writing.

hercyulelog · 11/12/2004 21:40

Yes, be careful. We got an x box last xmas and most games are very adult and choice for his age is limited.

TwasTheNightBeforeXmasOwl · 12/12/2004 04:06

ds has a ps2 and if i refuse to let him play on it he gets moody. i make the point that he has a bedroom full of toys and some children arent so lucky but it seems to make little difference. im getting strict with it now. if he didnt have one i think he would feel left out with all his friends but i do not let him play on it too much. if he's upset then tough. ive switched it off on him a lot of times.

wickedwinterwitch · 12/12/2004 08:06

I dislike them too and I really think very small children have a hard time coping with them. Because dp moved in with us when ds was 3 he became interested in Playstation at the age of about 4 and we used to let him play football games on it. But I really think it affected his behaviour and made him overly aggressive and obsessional. In fact I posted here about it a lot, his behaviour was terrible and I think a lot of it was down to Playstation actually, we were letting him have too much of it. In the end we came to the conclusion that we should ration it and so that's what we do and have done for the past 3 years: he has Playstation twice a week, once after school for 2 hours and once one weekend morning for 2 hours. I would really hold out as long as you can and when you do allow it I would make sure it's NOT in his room and that he doesn't have unlimited access to it. I had a friend whose son did and you never saw him, he was just obsessed and spent all his non school time in his room playing shoot 'em ups. Very inappropriate I think. I do think my ds is fine with twice a week. He knows that's the rule and is OK with it. He'll probably leave home and spend about 5 years playing it non stop

noddyholder · 12/12/2004 08:36

my ds is 10 and got one for xmas 2 years ago he absolutely loves it but only plays on it weekends and not to the exclusion of other toys/games etc It also plays dvds and cds so is quite useful

MarsselectionboxLady · 12/12/2004 08:39

DS1 is 12 in a couple of days. We have held off with the whole playstation thing. We relented a couple of years ago and let him have a gameboy. We ration that, but to be honest he would rather play football, rugby and basketball instead. He even has football, rugby and basketball games for the gameboy. Anyway, I'm off back to bed for a quick hour. In very good mood as DT2 slept through . I think it's a good idea to hang back with the games consoles IMO

hollybet · 12/12/2004 09:11

my ds's are 8 and 11 and we have both a play station and x box. If I had my time over again we would have neither, as someone else swiad they are like caged animals when they can't get on them. Neither boy has a tv in his room, we only have the one in the living room, so if anyone else wants to watch tv they can't go on them. I'm really holding out against tv in rooms as I know that they woud then spend far too much time in front of a tv.

FlashingRudolphNose · 12/12/2004 10:27

My son is 6 and is desperate for one, but like you, I'm holding out as long as possible. We've got a FIFA football game for the PC which he's allowed on for half an hour per day (and loses time on it for bad behaviour which works well for him) and I'm hoping to fob him off with ath for as long as possible...

FlashingRudolphNose · 12/12/2004 10:28

sorry, that

spacedonkey · 12/12/2004 11:54

I have shared the same concerns about games consoles for my ds (now 11), but I found that playing adventure games (like Zelda) really helped his reading. He's always liked being read to, but was very behind with his literacy skills until a couple of years ago, and the computer games made a significant difference. You do have to be careful to censor the games though, some are really unsuitable.

JanH · 12/12/2004 12:31

I would definitely not get a 6-yr-old one. We have never even had gameboys. We do have a PS2 now, and did have a PS1 but DS1 had to buy them himself when he was quite old - 11 or 12 I think, can't remember exactly. (Actually we may have contributed towards the PS2 for Christmas or birthday.)

Just checked with him, he thinks he was 11 when he bought the PS1 with accumulated birthday money, and the PS2 was in a £200 bundle; we paid £75 and he paid £125. (He is 16 now.)

Thing is they are small and neat and, rather than just switching off, easily removed and concealed somewhere when the boys get obsessive about playing. They grump for a day or so and then find something else to do. I guess it helps that there are 2 of them and they can go off and play football or something.

lilibet, re TV in rooms, they don't have to be connected to an aerial! Our old small TV (same age as DS2 in fact) is in DS1's room and has had a VCR attached but doesn't even have that now. They can use the PS2 to watch DVDs of course but that can be monitored.

einRosentsprungen · 12/12/2004 12:49

Oh Janh - you are my hero! I think I will quote you in future when the need arises - hope that's OK

I find there is a certain peer pressure at school as to "who has what", but ds1 seems content atm to keep out of it completely. As far as his mates are concerned, I think having a PS1 is worse than having nothing at all, or even having a PS2 but the wrong games!

JanH · 12/12/2004 13:04

Please do, eRs!

DS1 just read what I wrote and fell over laughing - he finds it very amusing that we really do take his PS2 away - his friends don't believe him!

serenity · 12/12/2004 23:31

OK, just to come out on the other side here.

Games consoles are not the spawn of the devil, they will not immediately turn your child into some rabid illiterate yob. We own (deep breath now) a PS1, a PS2, an XBox, a Game Cube and a PC. DS's both have Gameboys - they are 6 and 4. I can honestly say that neither of my boys are obsessed or aggressive. DS1 has a reading age of 8.5, like spacedonkey I think he's been helped by playing rpg games where he's had to read lots of dialogue.

Like most things it's down to moderation and parental control.......don't let them sit in front of it for hours, don't buy games that are too old/violent for them, make them share and play together - lots of 2 player games are cooperative rather than combatative. DH has lots of games that I think are inappropriate for the boys, so they only get played when the kids are in bed.

Incidently, we only let them play games in the living room (no TVs in the bedrooms) and if we want the games off, then they go off.

Christmassbee · 12/12/2004 23:54

Actually it's been suggested to me that if used correctly then it could help my ds. My ds (6.5) loooves anything like this. He is now allowed it for 30 mins just before teatime if he has got through the day without any serious negative behaviour. I swear it is having a positive impact on him trying to behave.

I certainly wouldn't just give him free access all the time to it, he still loves reading. lego, knex etc.. (in the right mood!!)

xmashampermunker · 13/12/2004 01:06

We have a small problem here. We already have a PC, a laptop, a PS1, PS2 and Gamecube. I'm hoping that if DS grows up seeing these things used in moderation (oops for MN addiction - must curb that!) he'll not go loopy for them when he's bigger. Am I being totally naive?! Will also hide all DH's stupid violent car chase and big scary Mr Gun games. I only have nice games for my Gamecube like SuperMonkeyBall and Pikmin (i'm really eight years old)

misdee · 13/12/2004 08:53

we have a PS2 and my girls and 4 and 2. Tbh they dont ask to play it that often and if they do they want the eye toy play game on. they like the window cleaning game. But then neither me or DH play it that often, so they dont really pay much attention to it being there.

wickedwinterwitch · 13/12/2004 09:01

Serenity, I didn't say they were the spawn of the devil, I just said I dislike them, which I am entitled to do.

LAMBda · 13/12/2004 10:06

my boys aged 5 and 3 have a PS2, gameboys and a computer. They are not obsessive with them and have a lot of other interests - ds1 will spend hours playing with his Lego for example.

BTW ds1 had a Dreamcast when he was 18 months old - I blame his father

serenity · 13/12/2004 13:46

www - I'm not trying to put words in your mouth at all, honest. The comment was not aimed at you specifically, it just bugs me that when people generally start talking about kids playing console games it all tends to be really negative.

We had an Atari 'pong' game in the 70's and we got our first home computer in 1983 when I was 12, so I've grown up playing games. My Mum used to get told it was unhealthy for me to have my nose stuck in a book so much, now I'm getting told its bad for my kids to play games, when they have their own children I'm sure it'll be something else!

PaRumPumPumScum · 13/12/2004 14:10

Arrrgh! Have bought twins game cube for xmas- was seduced by donkey congo special offer and pleading of partner plus the rather nice thought of playing the sims on it and I thought we could buy a dancemat so I could paractice my moves and be less clumsy and ashamed should I ever venture onto a dance floor again. But now see that janh and her ds1 are against and she is my parenting guru cos she's grown such good uns already and he is my role model of choice for my boys- sob sob sob sob sob sob sob sob. And loads of my other fave netters are saying it's a bad idea too... Woe is me.

spacedonkey · 13/12/2004 14:11

chill scum!

everything in moderation

noddyholder · 13/12/2004 14:12

My ds is a really sweet gentle boy who happens to love playing games on a ps2 nothing more nothing less I think he plays equally with other toys and loves playing outside too.

MarsselectionboxLady · 13/12/2004 14:16

Don't hate PS, just held off. My nephew spends his life on it, but it's my DH that worries me. He'd probably live on it, esp as I live on MN. Each to their own. What works for some doesn't always for others. I'm such a wicked mother that my kids would think that a major event had occurred if a PS arrived here. It might, love the idea of a dance mat, also DS1 now too busy with school to obsess about it.

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