Bereavement

[Tiredoftoday13]

My Dad died over 6 years ago and to say I'm not coping is an understatement. There's been various issues/family concerns/sickness going on, so always another reason not to deal with it. However, now I'm thinking I need to deal/accept it as it's not only causing me pain but also difficulties in daily life. I know it's not going to be easy but has anyone got any suggestions of websites/books etc to help with this

No resources to offer as my dad died 30 years ago when I was a child and we were left to get on with it but I wanted to share that there's a bereavement board so you might get some good suggestions if you post there. There's a parental bereavement thread there too. I'll find the link.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/bereavement/4493231-For-Anyone-Needing-Support-After-Losing-a-Parent-Very-Supportive-Thread-March-2022?page=24

@BeBraveAndBeKind thank you for that as I couldn't find it myself

Hi OP,
So sorry you're dealing with this.
When my dad died (6 month terminal illness) I was in my very early 30's and was his primary carer. After his death I was pragmatic about it as I knew (given his illness) it was better for him to be dead than struggle on in pain. I then got
married and had my first child. There's 30 months between first and second child. When DD1 was almost 2 I had to go to counselling to address the trauma. My final session I told my counsellor I was expecting our second. So again, almost 5 years after he had died. There's no right and wrong with bereavement but the positive impact I got from talking to a professional was huge. Good luck and some for you.

Sorry for your loss

my my died three months ago and I’m trying to work through it efficiently

so this is what’s helped:

sleep and decent food

talking about her death. My husband and sister were there throughout the whole time she was sick. We have talked about everything.

i write a grief journal every day sometimes several times a day

l listen to The Grief Cast - podcast where people talk about their losses but it’s as light hearted as it can be and isn’t upsetting, just thought provoking

I’ve written extensively about my mum’s death: it was six months of illness and a lot happened. It’s straightened it out for me.

being outside

not drinking too much

in the next couple of weeks I am hoping to visit the hospital where it all happened : officially to say thanks but really for closure.

the mumsnet bereavement forum is fantastic

it’s a really hard journey and I feel for you. I hope theee suggestion are useful. ❤️

Ps I’ve also watched documentaries on the bits I can handle like ICU and funeral directors on Netflix.

@FergussSingsTheBlues thank you and yes the suggestions have helped. I think unfortunately or fortunately not quite sure really its in my head and my stubbornness to accept hes gone. It's quite bizarre really cause as an adult and logically I know he's gone but emotionally I keep thinking if I'm better at something he'll come back.