Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Other subjects
Original poster

Should I move and give us all a fresh start ?

80 replies

nutcracker · 20/01/2008 22:11

I registered on a HA exchange site and someone is very very interested in swaping homes with me.

Basically i'd be swapping from a 4 bed to a 12mth old 3 bed about 20/30 min away by car. It is in a place that I know (roughly) and have always wanted to live. Trouble is, I don't drive so it actually makes it more like an hour away on public transport. That doesn't bother me, but I know it would upset my mum and annoy xp, who has literally just moved 2 min away from us.

As I said, I would be moving away from my mum who is currently my only family support, and also xp who I have nothing nice to say about at the moment, but he is the kids dad obviously.

I feel really really selfish for even considering it but at the same time I feel like I need to do it, I need a fresh start and 2 get some independance. Plus the house needs nothing at all doing to it, whereas mine needs lots doing, which I just cannot afford to do.

If I only had to consider myself then i'd not think twice but obviously I have the kids to think about.

I need to decide wether to take this any further and view the house ( have seen pics), and let the other person view mine. I don't want to mess anyone around.

OP posts:
ScoobyDoo · 21/01/2008 17:07

Nutty i think you should go for it, follow your heart....

Original poster
nutcracker · 21/01/2008 17:27

Fingers crossed the HA are on my side with this.

OP posts:
Original poster
nutcracker · 21/01/2008 18:47

Just had an offer from Devon

Now I think that is a bit too far LOL.

I did say i'd consider a 3 way though LOL.

OP posts:
tiredemma · 21/01/2008 18:54

nutty- go to thread on 'going back to work'

Original poster
nutcracker · 21/01/2008 19:00

Which one, mine ??

OP posts:
Original poster
nutcracker · 22/01/2008 11:52

OMG, have just rung the HA and asked wether the lady in Lichfield would be ok to swap to a 4 bed, and the first person I spoke to said they didn't think so, but then they put me through to someone else and they said yes, they didn't think it would be a problem

So now I need to arrange viewings.

Now, do I tell my mum i'm thinking of moving now, or after I have viewed ??

OP posts:
Original poster
nutcracker · 22/01/2008 12:09

Can anyone think of anything else important that I need to check services of ??

So far I have compared the distances of School, Shops, Park, Doctors and Hospital with where I am now and if we lived there, and so far everything would be closer if we lived there.

OP posts:
Original poster
nutcracker · 22/01/2008 12:13

Train stations

OP posts:
Original poster
nutcracker · 22/01/2008 12:13

Should I ring the possible school i'd want them to go to now, or after I have viwed the house ??

OP posts:
ScoobyDoo · 22/01/2008 12:19

Wow thats good news, i always say is something is ment to be then it will happen.

I would phone schools when you have viewed, you could call them to see if they have spaces, i did this with ds's school, then filled in forms, then phoned to let them know it was going through & we were moving, off to view on thursday.

Have you booked a day to view yet?

Original poster
nutcracker · 22/01/2008 12:20

Not boked a day to view yet no, have sent the lady a message so as soon as she gets back we can sort it out.

Just worried that I might have a problem getting all 3 kids into the same school.

Still not sure wether to tell my mum yet either.

OP posts:
magnolia74 · 22/01/2008 12:48

We have looked at 2 houses so far and both not suitbale so I wouldn't sort the schools out yet or tell your mum to be honest. Tempting fate maybe Go have a look first and then decide.

Godd luck xx

lazarou · 22/01/2008 13:25

Nutcracker, don't do anything until you have viewed the place.

hippipotami · 22/01/2008 13:36

The only thing I would do, is ring the school near you want them to go to and se eif they have space. Because if they cannot accomodate all 3 children then you have to see if it is feasible doing school-runs to two or more different schools. If not, then there may be no point in even viewing the house.

hippipotami · 22/01/2008 13:36

school which you want them to go to, not near

Original poster
nutcracker · 22/01/2008 13:51

Right, I have told my mum, it was playing on my mind and I felt like I was going behind her back.

Anyway she was absolutly fine with it and said that if it was what I wanted then go for it, and she'd still come and babysit etc and just stay over and go home next day

OP posts:
lazarou · 22/01/2008 13:52

Your mum sounds lovely Nutcracker

lazarou · 22/01/2008 13:53

Why don't you ask her to move in with you? Or is that a crazy idea?

Original poster
nutcracker · 22/01/2008 14:02

Not enough room

Rang local school and there is a prob. They have space for both dd's in yr 3 and 5 but are full in reception, although she did stress that the situation could change.

OP posts:
tiredemma · 22/01/2008 14:08

what can you do now then? are you going to go and view? Will the school put ds on a list?

Original poster
nutcracker · 22/01/2008 14:12

Didn't ask about list, but I suppose they wouldn't do that until we were actually in the area.

Next thing is, i need her to send me the measurements of the bedrooms. She said they are good sizes but I want to check that. Then if they are ok we view each others and then if agreed we apply to exchange. The HA check our rent accounts to make sure we are not in arearrs and then if everything checks out ok, they agree to the swap, and then we pick a dtae and thats it.

OP posts:
Original poster
nutcracker · 23/01/2008 09:22

Argh the lady now seems to be ignoring my messages and from the site i use it looks like she has expressed interest in someone elses house

OP posts:
lazarou · 23/01/2008 10:29

Don't get down about it, it's only a house, there will be others.

magnolia74 · 23/01/2008 10:54

I know the feeling
The first house we saw, I got so over excited. Looked at schools and everything. It wasn't to be and I was so dissapointed, the 2nd house was fantastic but an awful area so it was us that said no but we did speak to them about it.
Some people are just rude and don't reply or make contact if they decide they don't want your house but there will be other houses

lazarou · 23/01/2008 11:01

We were planning to buy a house once, but our buyers messed us around and we had to pull out. I'm so glad we didn't buy it because there was an article in the paper a week later about that area being a hot spot for prostitutes and drug dealers. Plus we would have lost money on the house and there was no parking.

Swipe left for the next trending thread