Following mumsnet survey-"modern parents have no stamina" but did 1960s parents have a much easier less hands-on time?

[Evenhope]

Comment posted in Telegraph about the results of mumsnet survey
"When I was young there were no washing machines, tumbler driers, dish washers, refrigerators, freezers, central heating or convenience foods. Very few could afford motor cars or holidays. Our mothers just got on and looked after the house, cooked the food, hand washed the clothes and brought us up. I can?t remember my mother moaning about how hard she worked. The modern parents have no stamina.
Posted by WHG on November 18, 2007 10:44 AM"

How many of us born in the 1960s and 1970s actually feel our mothers had an easier job? They weren't expected to be involved in our school life (we were allocated a place- no choice); they didn't ferry us around everywhere and we played out on our own.

Ah. Behind every good women is....another (older) good woman eh??

But Belgo, WOHM mothers often say they feel pressurised to downsize their careers. That they are made to feel guilty for still wanting a career.

I suppose there is no objective way of saying whether our mothers had it easier than us. Which mother and which us? I know that my life is much easier than my mother's was. But it's entirely possible that I'm not statistically usual.

When you think of the anxiety you see on MN.

Breast vs bottle
baby led weaning vs spooning
Home school vs stste school
State school vs private
seelective schools vs non selective
Scouts vs woodcraft folk
Organic food vs that strange inorganic stuff
baby wearing vs quinny zapps
Continuum parenting vs non

the list is endless, or seems to be. My mother just got on with it

I know but how typical is MN? And mostly it's not anxiety, there's no debate. It's fiercely held opinions on both sides - ie people getting on with it their own way.

that's interesting NKF.

I just never realised that my life now would be so similar to that of my mother's thrity years ago.

But I do think my dh has a very different life to my father. My father would leave the house at 8.30am every day and be home before 6pm. There was no computer, not even a phone at home, so when my dad was at home, he could relax.

My husband however works many hours a day, comes home late, gets out his laptop, does more work, and is accessible 24 hours a day 7 days a week on his work mobile, the same as much of the working population nowadays.

My father never changed nappies. I expect my dh to!

yes, possibly. But one assumes that they went through a period of weighing up the options, and the less confident will alays be second guessing themselves (me included on occasion)

Ie will little Swanhilda be a sucess if I don't take her to Tumbletots. Will little Eric fail to become a brain surgeon because I gave him ordinary milk instead of ultra filtered organic single cow milk, or whatever. Will my son become a mad axe murderer because I shouted at him,. there seems to be real anxiety sometimes

I don't believe anyone really thinks like that. Or even close to that. Swanhilda great name though.

I think that larger numbers of parents will blame themselves if their child 'fails to fulfil their potential' now than did when I was a child.

We just seemed to be left to get on with it. Pass or fail it was up to us. Wheras now you have Kumon maths, parents tutoring or paying tutors for 11+ exams, extra classes in this, that and the other. My mother would have known what 'level' I was at if her life (or mine) depended on it. No-ones parents would have.

sorry, that should be my mother wouldn't have know the level I was at

Possibly. Or more parents knowing how to play the system which isn't necessarily bad knowledge to have.

You might be right, but with that comes the anxiety of choice. 'is this the Right school', 'is this the right tutor', 'is my child G and T' and so on and so on.

I'm not saying those things are wrong but they do seem to make people axious.

My mother, in comparison, lived in blissful ignorance.

My mother did too but I'd always pick information over ignorance however blissful.

Oh, I think that I would too, but it is a double edged sword.

I agree MB, my mum had a feeling I was clever and that was that. Infact I was clever at some things but was having quite a hard time at school and skived a lot and she was clueless.

My dd is only six and I know exactly where her strenghs and weaknesses lie, I know what NC levels she is working at, I know that she can't sit next to her best friend in class as they can't stop arguing, I know about the new reporting system the school is about to use, I know the school discipline policy, I know what changes are about to me made to the school and I could go on.