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Original poster

Cleaner talking to others about my house!

50 replies

Mella91 · 23/02/2020 16:02

Hi,

I had a cleaner previously who I wasn't happy with. My friend recommended her cleaner to me who I asked to come twice a week. She came last week and did a great job! I was over the moon as where we live I cannot find a decent one. Today when I was talking to my friend she said the cleaning lady was at hers today and she spoke about my house to her. Her words were 'x house was so dirty' 'I spent ages there' 'She is very messy'

I am so so upset by this as the cleaning lady didn't say anything to me! I am a full-time working mum to a 9month old. I try my best constantly but at this stage my priorities are spending as much time as I can with my baby and providing him with good wholesome food. Yes my house is messy (we have toys all over and lots of items we could do with throwing out) but it is NEVER dirty! I had a cleaning lady before this one who came twice a week - how 'dirty' could my house be!

I don't know how to handle this situation, I don't want to stop working with this cleaner as she did a great job in comparison to the other cleaners I have however she goes to other peoples houses who I know to and I am worried she will tell them my home situation.

I dont know how to deal with this situation

OP posts:
RandomMess · 23/02/2020 16:04

What was your friend's motivation for telling you what the cleaner supposedly said?

FairfaxAikman · 23/02/2020 16:04

This would be a deal-breaker for me, no matter how good she is. She has no right to discuss your home outside your four walls.

WinterCat · 23/02/2020 16:05

There will be other good or better cleaners and I’d use one of them.

RositaEspinosa · 23/02/2020 16:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LooseleafTea · 23/02/2020 16:07

I would just have a gentle word to ask her not to discuss it or to mention anything directly to you if a problem.

Original poster
Mella91 · 23/02/2020 16:07

I dont understand her motivation too because this was the last thing I needed to here as a new mother :( It has really put me down. We have a nanny who comes daily to our house and helps with chores. The house is hoovered at least every other day and mopped. We never have dirty dishes or laundry lying around. The most I can think is we have lots of toys around and also lots of items ie vases, decor etc.

OP posts:
Whynosnowyet · 23/02/2020 16:07

Not a good cleaner ime.
Cleaner here. At least 5 of my customers know each other. The only thing that gets passed on are funny dc anecdotes!!

Original poster
Mella91 · 23/02/2020 16:09

hear** oops

I dont think my friend would lie about something like this.

I have had 4 other cleaners who have always been quite lazy, having rests every 20 mins spending time on phone etc. She was the first to manage to finish to whole house and leave everything spotless. I could find someone else but im sure they wont be like her.

OP posts:
Hoohaahoo · 23/02/2020 16:10

Oh that’s not on. I’m a cleaner and I might moan to my cleaner colleagues about a house but I would never say anything to anyone else. It’s not professional.

Try and find another cleaner.

bottlenose301 · 23/02/2020 16:14

Tricky one if shes great but I'm sure you could find another great cleaner. Maybe your friend exaggerated what was said but doesn't sound good.

You could ask her directly about it or just let her go.

Roselilly36 · 23/02/2020 16:14

My cleaner is like this too, tells me a lot about other customers, dread to think what she says about me!

Guardsman18 · 23/02/2020 16:14

I wouldn't like that either. To me it's like an unspoken rule.

If you are the type of person who can mention it to her, then do tell her.

Me and a friend had the same lady clean for us. My friend had six dc's, a 9 bedroom house, 3 bathrooms and she had the audacity to tell a mutual friend that her house was messy! Yes ... that's where you come in love.

I never felt the same about her again and wondered what she was saying about me!

Branleuse · 23/02/2020 16:18

Get rid. The last thing you need is a judgemental gossipy cleaner. Its very intimate letting someone into your home. I would be extremely upset about this

Itwasntme1 · 23/02/2020 16:50

Surely the whole point of having a cleaner is to clean the house😊. If it was spotless the cleaner would have nothing to do.

I would say to the cleaner you understand she has been complaining about your house, and ask if there are any areas which need to be cleared before she arrives. Then say you be grateful of she came to you with any issues, rather than discussed your house with others.

ballsdeep · 23/02/2020 16:56

I wouldn't be happy at all. Both myself and my friend had the same cleaner and she told my friend that she saw my ovulation kits and pregnancy tests and that I was trying for a baby 😠😠😠😠 I hadn't told anyone we were trying at the time. The same cleaner also told someone else that I needed to throw toys outlet as my house was cluttered . It's really not but we do have three children!! I was so cross

Itwasntme1 · 23/02/2020 17:21

Being a cleaner must be an interesting job in that you get to see the most intimate side of people.

You can learn aLot about someone, what their habits are, how much they are drinking, how much sex they are having, what their finances are like, all their dirty little habits.

While I can understand the temptation to gossip, surely too much gossip results in you getting fired though?

I have a new cleaner starting tomorrow and have spent all day clearing out the house. I don’t care if this lady thinks I am messy or dirty, if I was a clean freak I would have no need for her😊. I am paying extra for a deep clean to start - so am acknowledging the house needs some extra attention.

Bit having read some things on mumsnet of the last few days I am getting nervous.

Lweji · 23/02/2020 17:26

Maybe your friend was trying to see if she had said something to you?
It's odd. If she talked about yours to your friend, she must realise she'll talk about her to others too.

Maybe she asked. Hmm

Not sure either. If you're really happy with the cleaning, maybe the odd comment about the state of your house is bearable.

Sunflower20 · 23/02/2020 17:26

Very unprofessional, I'd fire her straight away and tell her why.

Hoohaahoo · 23/02/2020 17:29

I don’t know how much sex my clients are having or what their finances are like. What do you think cleaners do?!

Whynosnowyet · 23/02/2020 17:32

Found some Viagra once..
And a lube collection - different customer, a day he knew I was coming -
And the aftermath pants...
Envy
Not envy.

Kalifa · 23/02/2020 17:32

I wouldn’t give a shit. As long as she cleans the house she can go and say what she wants.
Domestic staff all gossip among themselves about their employers.

Itwasntme1 · 23/02/2020 17:47

@Hoohaahoo I meant if you are changing sheets, bins etc. Also noticing purchases and final demands.

I read it all in a blog when I was hiring a cleaner. Maybe I am too naive and believed it😊

CornishPorsche · 23/02/2020 17:48

DH's friend's wife is a cleaner. She did a deep clean of our house for us when we went in holiday. I then heard from 3 unconnected people that she'd slagged us off and that the house was horrific. It certainly was not, and she's never been invited to step foot here again whether as a cleaner or a friend.

Rebellenny · 23/02/2020 17:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

katy1213 · 23/02/2020 17:54

If she's a gossip, I doubt you'll cure by pulling her up on it. I'd be cross - but it's not easy to find a good cleaner! Maybe you could say that you didn't appreciate being discussed with her other client and that you find it unprofessional; and that if other people's houses weren't messy, she'd be out of a job. Then be sure to hide anything private before she comes round.