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Original poster

My friend doesn't like her child's name - any advice?

50 replies

IrisMurdoch · 31/08/2007 15:44

This sounds a bit silly but my friend has been depressed for ages because she no longer likes the name she gave her daughter.

She thought the name was less common than it actually is and she says it gets her down EVERY DAY. She's even not looking forward to putting her daughter into nursery in case there are two other little girls with the same name in the class...

I've told her she needs to get over this and enjoy her daughter but she says she can't help it and she wishes she could turn the clock back...

Does anyone have any advice? Thank you!

OP posts:
frazzledbutcalm · 31/08/2007 15:46

Think its not really the name thats the issue. dd has 4 girls in her class called chloe and she thinks its great that so many girls share one name! Could it be she's worried about dd going to nursery and doesn't know how to cope with it?

Dinosaur · 31/08/2007 15:47

Sorry, it is silly! But how about a nickname - I used to work with a guy whose real name was Bimal, but who was known to everyone as Vip, because his mother decided not to use his name and call him Vip instead!

Tigana · 31/08/2007 15:48

TBH?
Get over it...a name does not a person maketh. Her dd will still be an individual.

Sounds a little like she is being a bit too snooty about "common" names tbh.

Out of proportion reaction.

Nothing else bothering her that she is ignoring an dfocussing on this instead?

hanaflower · 31/08/2007 15:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JeremyVile · 31/08/2007 15:50

I am not too keen on DSs name as I was pushed into it by ILs but he's 18mths now and iif I could turn back time I would not have it but its him now and it no longer bothers me (much ).

How old is your friends DD?

I think she probably just has to get over it and I'm sure she'll get used to it in time.

Original poster
IrisMurdoch · 31/08/2007 15:50

I don't think so FbC but that's an interesting theory...she's quite relieved that dd is going to nursery I think!!

OP posts:
frazzledbutcalm · 31/08/2007 15:52

Are we allowed to know the name?

aloha · 31/08/2007 15:52

well, yes it is a bit silly, obviously and I wonder if this is really teh cause of her feeling depressed or if life is getting her down - is she happy otherwise? Re the name though, why not use a nickname. My daughter's name sounds nothing like Lulu, but I often use it as a nickname, and usually use the short form of her name. I also call her poppet. I know quite a few people known by their nickname.

frazzledbutcalm · 31/08/2007 15:54

There's got to be something else going on because tbh you dont just suddenly dislike a name after 3 years

Original poster
IrisMurdoch · 31/08/2007 15:54

Her dd is 3. Think she has a grandmother's quite frumpy middle name. Should I tell her to get over it?

OP posts:
Tortington · 31/08/2007 15:55

think if i was that bothered i would research how tohave it legally changed.

can i ask what the name is?

frazzledbutcalm · 31/08/2007 15:56

Definitely tell her to get over it, but in a nice way. Maybe also talk about things in general to find out and help of what's really bothering her.

JeremyVile · 31/08/2007 15:56

It would be tricky getting a 3yo used to the fact that her name was no longer her name though.

frazzledbutcalm · 31/08/2007 15:56

It's easy to change a name, you just go to solicitor and get it changed by deed poll. Nothing to it! BUT i dont think thats really the problem

nailpolish · 31/08/2007 15:57

some people like to think they ahve chosen an exclusive name, and feel quite smug about it
my SIL was like this until she put announcement in the paper and there were 2 other birth announcements of the same name
oh how i chuckled

Original poster
IrisMurdoch · 31/08/2007 15:57

She has found motherhood a little overwhelming, I guess. But I think she felt hurried into naming dd after the birth and gave in to a bit of pressure from dp to stop calling her 'the baby'.

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Tigana · 31/08/2007 15:58

Sounds like she does like the name, just doesn't like the fact it is frequently occurring in general poluation, when she thought it would be an original/unique.

For example, the name Emily, is lovely and very pretty, but also very popular.

But then the name Taaammmmiyiyiyii is unique...but crap.

If that is what is bugging her, I suspect she needs a slap in the face with a wet haddock. There are worse things in life than not having a unique name.

Original poster
IrisMurdoch · 31/08/2007 15:59

Would rather not say wot name is - cos don't want to cause offence - it is in top ten girls names tho!! I think it's a lovely name personally.

OP posts:
frazzledbutcalm · 31/08/2007 16:00

There's the real problem. it's not her dd name, its the fact really that she's a mum and maybe hasn't found it easy. If she sees others managing fine and feeling fine it will hit her hard coz she doesn't feel that way. She must've liked name 3 years ago. I can't imagine calling mine something i didn't like, even in the heat of the moment

Tigana · 31/08/2007 16:01

emily?
jessica?
chloe?
sophie?
elizabeth?
isabelle?
Amy?

um

frazzledbutcalm · 31/08/2007 16:02

You wouldn't cause offence, just tell us name ..... please.

Piggy · 31/08/2007 16:03

Does her daughter like the name? If so, end of story.

Original poster
IrisMurdoch · 31/08/2007 16:03

I think Tigana has hit nail on head - she likes the name a lot but didn't realise so many other people do too.

Thank you for your comments!

OP posts:
frazzledbutcalm · 31/08/2007 16:05

We're not gonna find out what it is then? Hmm, ok, i'll go make kids tea instead.

Original poster
IrisMurdoch · 31/08/2007 16:05

OK, it's Ruby. I think it's a beautiful name and it really suits her.

OP posts:
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