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Original poster

Should 10 year old with no boobs get a gra?

31 replies

mears · 17/09/2004 18:21

My DD was desperate for a bra today as 5 friends at school have one (only 2 actually need one!)
I got her 2 crop tops that had bra like straps but they weren't what she wanted. They had no clip at the back.

heart stopped there as she just came into room and would die if she knew I was asking this <

Anyway - I remember my mum wouldn't let me get a bra until I actually needed one. I was so upset that other girls had bra straps and I didn't. So off we went to Asda where she tried on a 28AA bra which is actually OK on her. Her chest is completely flat .

Should I have told her no? Am I making her older than her years by letting her wear this piece of cotton with a clasp?

Mums of girls fill me in on this aspect of motherhood.

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 17/09/2004 18:27

If it makes her happy, what's the problem? She might get bored with it after a while anyway. Thank goodness I have boys - hoepfully I won't have this problem!

fuzzywuzzy · 17/09/2004 18:32

IMHO 10 isn't very young at all, does no harm even if she doesn't actually need it. Keep in mind my dd is only a baby still, I remember I got my first when I was 11, made me feel so grown up...

Original poster
mears · 17/09/2004 18:32

A BRA even

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 17/09/2004 18:34

I think I got mine at around 13 and I hated it - I felt so self conscious about the fact that it was clear I now needed one. Maybe it actuall is better to get them before you need them anyway...

fuzzywuzzy · 17/09/2004 18:36

I think my attitude was affected by the fact I went to a girls school and most of the girls already had them.

MUMINAMILLION · 17/09/2004 18:36

Hi mears. My dd was 10 when she was given a bra from a friend. I wasnt sure what to do, but decided to let. She only wore it a couple of times until the novelty wore off. (She has just reminded me that she wore it under a tight top once and it looked like she was Dolly Parton and that was when she decided it wasnt for her!) She is 11 now and has started wearing them again.

motherinferior · 17/09/2004 18:37

I had boobs from very young so had the opposite problem. I'd think if she's just wearing a cotton one it's OK - do see what you mean though. Arrrghhh. Just keep her away from lacy jailbait stuff - plenty of time for that when she is old bat of 41 desperately gussying up the old assets

(NOT that of course breastfeeding has affected them, no, of course not, not all, Mears)

hana · 17/09/2004 19:28

still don't have boobs here (well do becasue I'm pregnant...) I started wearing a bra in grade 6 (11 or 12 years) because all my friends were.......it was so uncomfortable that I took it off at lunchtime!! Of course all the boys noticed this and never let me forget it.....!
I would let her, it's all part of feeling part of the group and the same as her friends.

suedonim · 17/09/2004 21:54

I was going to suggest crop tops but I see you've BTDT without success. I think dd1 was about 11 or 12 when she started wearing those children's bras from M&S. She had nothing to put in them, mind, and still doesn't, five years on! However, that didn't stop her from wheedling dosh out of me today for new undies from Asda's Tickled Pink range.

Dh does most of the laundry in this house and is bemused by dd1's knickers, most of which are no more than a couple of bits of black elastic and a smidgen of lace. G*d, she'd kill me if she knew what I was writing - luckily she's out tonight!

MeanBean · 17/09/2004 22:00

Not at all helpful, but I had a friend who by the age of 14 was size 34D, and her mother refused to buy her a bra bigger than a 32A because until she was 16, nothing bigger than 32A was respectable.

Aren't people weird?

I think you did the right thing. It's only another garment and as long as it's not the over-sexualised stuff, why not?

jampot · 17/09/2004 22:29

dd is 11 and has been cultivating hers for about 18 months now - we went out and bought her a bra but she refused to wear it because it made her feel uncomfortable. Anyway she is obviously getting bigger now to the stage where her boobs wobble and so I have insisted she wear some - but she's only measuring a 30A. A lot of her friends last year were wearing them even though they had nothing to put in them - one of her friends came for a sleepover and is compeltely flat but brought with her 2 spare bras "just in case"

jampot · 17/09/2004 22:30

no boobed friend also wears a thong!!! she's 12 tomorrow !!!

suedonim · 17/09/2004 23:48

She'll never be able to have children, Jampot - that's what I tell dd1.

Original poster
mears · 18/09/2004 00:25

Well she is delighted with herself and has gone to bed weraing it

She wondered how long the straps would 'dig in' her shoulders for. I said 'the rest of your life'. Maybe in a few days she'll change her mind

OP posts:
jasper · 18/09/2004 00:28

mears consider yourself lucky you have a daughter interested in feminine things.
My 3yo girl won't even wear PANTS.

MUMINAMILLION · 18/09/2004 00:37

Give it time Jasper. dd2 (who normally would go for months before having a bath/never brushes her hair/lives in jeans & trackies and plays rugby) actually wore lip gloss today! Mind you, she is now 9 so it is about time!

jasper · 18/09/2004 18:44

muminamillion you have given me hope

Lonelymum · 18/09/2004 19:00

I remember taking my sister's old bras out of her drawer and wearing them when she had left home - must have been about 13. Can't remember what happened next, but I suppose my mother took the hint and bought me some of my own.
Kids do seem to grow up younger and younger these days, but if it makes your dd happy to be wearing a bra, I don't think it is a problem. It is important for children her age (especially girls, I think) to feel they fit in with their peer group and so if 5 friends have bras, it will be quite an important issue to your dd.

fuzzywuzzy · 18/09/2004 19:02

Jampot I'm intrigued as to what sort of emergency would require the use of three bras.. am assuming sleepover only lasted one night and she left the following day????

jampot · 19/09/2004 08:47

fuzzy - yes it was only one night and she lived literally opposite. OTT IMO

lou33 · 19/09/2004 10:19

DD1 started wearing a bra a few months ago, she has only got little bumps, but you can definitely see something growing. She has a few bras, which i don't mind at all, but what did concern me was the amount of underwired and padded bras on sale for girls her age (she is 12 1/2) and size (30a). It was quite hard to get a non underwired, unpadded, plain bra. Asda in the end, and LA Redoute, but even then, most of their stock was padded etc.

Thongs? Not until she has left home, got married and had children

carla · 19/09/2004 10:47

Jasper you made me laugh. We have this ongoing debate in our house - DH insists on calling them pants and I insist on calling them knickers! You've settled the argument, but I won't let him know! Mears, I hated the whole bra thing, but if dd wants one then I think that's fine

jampot · 19/09/2004 10:50

No No No - girls wear knickers, boys wear pants

carla · 19/09/2004 10:52

Thank you Jampot!!

Original poster
mears · 19/09/2004 12:28

Sorry - knickers is a naughty word up here - definately pants

OP posts: