Is "Nurturing" a US word ?

[pupuce]

Hello everyone,

I am testing something on my British friends..... is the word nurturing a US (mainly) word or would you use it ? and do you understand it ?
I am thinking of calling my UK doula "business" : Nurturing families because it's really about that... but maybe people won't understand it....
Thank you for your opinions

I like "Mamma Nurture" too. And I think it's great that you're willing to try and include all people from all sorts of different backgrounds, Pupuce.

While I think that SofiaAmes is right to point out that £250 would be too expensive for someone on benefits, I don't agree at all that lower income families wouldn't want the services of a doula. I think there might be an education issue (ie some people might not have heard of a doula or not be clear on what they do) but I'm hopeful that your health visitor will be able to find you some people who're interested in accessing your "4 free births" service. "Benefit Mums", as Sofia put it, are not a lumpen indistinguishable mass after all; some people will be interested and thrilled by the idea of a doula and some won't.

This is so exciting, Pupuce! I'm dead impressed with you getting this business off the ground. Well done indeed, that woman.

Thank you Scummymummy...

I don't expect benefits mum to be interested in general either but maybe single mums or teenagers on low incomes??
Let me be cheeky and probably be a bit ;-) controversial here... is 250 GBP too much for a benefit mum ? How much does it cost to bottle feed from birth to 1 ??? She could save taht money by bf and get a doula ... hihihi !
As I was typing this I went to do a bit of calculation actually....just for the fun of it (i had to go online to find prices so this may not be as cheap as some stores):
4 bottles (can't imagine most benefit mums have less) : 12 GBP
16 teets : 15 GBP
1 can of SMA (400g) 4 GBP x 52 weeks (I fon't know how many cans a week are used I am presuming 1 !)= 208
And maybe a sterilser at 25 GBP

Total : So we are above 250 GBP aren't we ????

Oh why did I bother doing all the maths.... it's on Fact of the day on the home page... BF saves you 450 GBP a year!!!

I might be showing my ignorance but I don't really know much about doulas. I think I read in a baby magazine a long time ago that they are a sort of birthing partner, but I don't know what other help they provide. It was never discussed as an option during my pregnancies and I don't know if they are available in the North, or if it is more of a London thing. Please enlighten me.

Good calculations, Pupuce, but just as a point of interest I think you'll find that many Mums on benefits would use milk tokens to get the actual milk... See here if you want to know more.

Scummy - I know - I was just being cheeky !

PamT- Can I suggest that you look at www.doula.org.uk to see more info on doulas. There are 2 sorts though :
Birth : who meet the mum and partner before the birth and have 2 or more long discussions + phone exchanges/e-mails, then the doula comes for the whole birth (how ever long ! no shift change and she doesn't leave the mum unless asked to), then the doula comes (usually) twice after the baby is born to see how things are BF wise, and other matters.

Post natal doula is booked and paid by the hour (if you go via an agency the booking is far more rigid + you pay a fee to the agency), she does all sorts of work for mum, baby and other sibblings...

There are doulas as far as Scotland ! Again that website has a "find a doula" page...

Doulas are only now starting to get more publicity but there have been doulas in other countries- they may be called other things. They are NOT medical. There have also been studies of the effect of doulas on labours (in the US and Ireland among other countries)... basically it's 50% less chance of having a c-section, less managed labours and less pain relief, greater success at BF and dad (who are often reluctant at first) find them excellent because in a way it takes some of the pressure off them and allows them to enjoy the birth. Basically the fact that a doula is constently at your side (she may say nothing but she has a loving and watchful eye over the proceedings) is very re-assuring for parents - especially when the medical staff keeps coming in and out and leaving parents on their own for long periods of time. Doulas have (usually) been to several (many) births.

What I have given you are averages of course !

Batters and all- before you start to think that all doulas charge 250... they don't !
You can get a doula for that price... the average from what I see is 400 - which in terms of hourly rate is still ridiculously cheap... here are my maths again !
2 ante natal visit at your home (+/- 6 hours)
1st labour : on a good day 15 hours (there are loads of doulas who have been at 48 hours labour and 20 is quite common as doulas usually come before MW do pr before a mumg oes to hospital!)
2 post natal visists : +/- 4 hours
All the calls and e-mails you want : let's be conservative and say 5 hours !

So we got 30 hours as a minimum and as I have said most cases are far more (doulble) than that... this includes costs (car, childcare, etc)

You could be Mamma Nurture - because Everyone Matters, Pupuce.
Particularly in the light of the rather nice snippet you provided saying that the women inmates at Holloway have access to doula services. Shame these doulas don't also have lock-picking training - the idea of a woman handcuffed for any part of her birth experience is v. distressing.
I hope they don't let you near the publicity material or website in your new post ScummyMummy . When do you start?

A lot of the low-income families that I know wouldn't need a doula as there seems to be much more instance of close family members being supportive and attending the birth. Mums, grannies etc all seem to play a much closer role in the family unit than they do with 'middle class' mums, who often find themselves isolated.

Pupuce

Have followed the discussion with interest, particularly with regard to identifying potential clients.

Have you thought of contacting your local Business Link or Enterprise branch (library or council will be able to put you in touch).

I come from a pr and marketing background and it sounds like you could use a bit of help in this area - the organisations mentioned run free or v.cheap courses (usually 1 day) for business start-up issues, and have access to all sorts of information that would be useful.

Perhaps it would be best to contact other doulas and/or their training organisations to build up a profile of the 'typical' client and how best to reach them in terms of advertising and publicity.

I think it's important to remember that 'benefit mums' (have been one myself on and off for 10 years) do only receive enough money to live off, nothing more. A parent with two children currently receives £108/week - that's food, bills, clothing, everything. Of course maybe the baby's father could/would pay if she asked, or her parents, so don't ignore this group entirely.

I would also recommend that you read Lynne Franks' 'The Seed Handbook', an ethical, values-led and feminine business start-up guide.

Can't help with the name I'm afraid...my hot favourite so far is Scummy's 'Go Doulally' - that would be really memorable and would get you lots of publicity!

hth, love Mopsy x

Thanks Mopsy...I appreciate you taking the time to write all of this.

I also have a PR background but I haven't impressed you obvioulsy ... I did do a 3 day start up course and that was very helpful. I am in contact with Business Link. And I have set up a group for local doulas... so I know the local ones and we meet every 2 months (when we share experiences) . I have also met the head of midwifery and several midwives (to tell them we were there and what we did and how we trained) and as of Sunday I start shadowing a midwife and will get to see births !

I am not expecting to have low-income families interested in my services anyway but I wish money was not an issue. I have always planned to take an X amount of clients pro-bono as I want to do this out of love for doulaying not to become the next Gina Ford!!!!

Out of interest pupuce. Would you not prefer to train as a midwife and then offer these services as an independent midwife?

I think I would be frustrated as a doula not being able to actually perform the delivery as well. Interesting subject.

Pupuce - really admire you getting this off the ground. However, when comparing cost of BF with bottle feeding you need to add in the cost of all the bloody washing of sheets and towels etc from all that leaking and all the damn breast pads! I don't think there was that much difference in price in the end.

Tinker, don't forget nipple cream, cabbage, nursing bra, second nursing bra when first turns out to be spectacularly uncomfortable, ridulously overpriced nursing pillow, whole new set of clothes because nothing you own opens in front, second whole new set of clothes because you've lost a stone... third new set of clothes because you're feeling traumatised about giving up b/f...

Personally, I think nurturing's a lovely word, although Go Doulally did make me spit my tea out with hysterics...

Reusable breast pads don't cost that much. And the sheets generally get covered in sick so need washing anyway IME. Don't get me wrong - I'm all for encouraging/supporting breast feeding. And I too am really impressed with what you are trying to achieve Pupuce.

You guys really make me laugh.... thank you !

Mears - I did contemplate the idea see this thread which I started. But to cut a long story short... I don't want to deliver... (I think!) Also I can't take 3 years to sudy and earn no income - I have a SAHD!

Marina-you were wondering about Holloway mums... well a doula colleague who works at Holloway wrote this to me :

The women go in to the Whittington Hospital to give birth and are no longer handcuffed for the actual birth, but they are for transfer to and from and they have two guards with them throughout there time in the Hospital, including during the birth.

Hi pupuce

Sounds like you're doing really well. How exciting that you're about to start seeing births, I would love to but think I would be a hopeless and soppy emotional mess - can't wait to hear all about it.

I wondered if instead of having a 'business name', you could simply use your name and add a strapline describing what you do, eg:

Xxxx Xxxxxxxx (name), Doula
'Independent natal support for mother & family'

or something like that. Mx

I was thinking that maybe "Pupuce" would be a good name, but just looked it up and see you said it was an endearment used for a wife or daughter. But maybe something like that?

Hope it all goes well. Judging from the advice doled out here, you seem to have the knack and good sense for it.

pupuce, good luck - just read this thread. Before you settle on a name for your business, I'd find out what other local doulas are calling themselves. It could be that the word 'nurturing' crops up lots.
(Bet no one else had coined the phrase 'go doulally' though!)

If you find out, can you list them here?

What?! Not let me near the publicity material, Marina? What can you mean? I am greviously offended!! (Or am I? )
I start in early September.

Mopsy... my last name is foreign and too difficult to pronounce and spell so.... not a great idea

Tigermoth... here are some other names and BELIEVE IT OR NOT... there is alrweady doulally taken (and registered as .com!)

In the UK these are the ones I am familiar with :
Safehands doula (in TW like me)
Fairy godmother
Hefferlumps
Brighton Birth Doulas
Mother Care
Millenia doulas
Positive birth

In the US - this is only a sample (I found over 600 doulas!) :
Birthease
Heart to heart
Tender Doula care
Birth Rite Doula support
DOula Birth Partners of Los Angeles
Mother Nurture
Labor of Love
Mothering the Mother
A Mothering touch
Gyntle Touch Birth
Birth Partners
Birth blessings
Gentle beginnings
Bringing bliss

and I could go on....

THANK YOU ALL FOR THE VERY KIND WORDS, CONTINUED SUPPORT AND CREATIVE IDEAS !!!!

goodness pupuce, you know your stuff ! will look at your list over the weekend and mull over any more suggestions I can add.

Well, call me over-sensitive, but I doubt I would employ a doula service called Hefferlumps, when at the barrage-balloon stage of pregnancy!