Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Other subjects
Original poster

WOULD LOVE TO LIVE IN A VILLAGE...SHOULD WE MOVE?

130 replies

noonar · 23/04/2007 14:45

we have 2 dds aged 2.9 and 5. dd1 is v happy at school. we have lots of friends and live in a lovely area...but, we've been here 14 yrs and fancy a change. and our house is on a v busy road and we are sick of the traffic noise.

we have lovely villages 20 mins drive away, and i would so love to be somewhere more peaceful.

how can i tell whether this is a just a pipe dream, or a really sensible idea? would we be mad to give up our friends and life in a nice community, just because we're a bit bored? and i worry about disrupting dd1's schooling. she's v happy here she is.

have considered quieter streets nearby, but they just don't excite me in the way that a more to the country does.

am also worried we'd really regret it if we moved and didnt make friends easily etc.

any advice? anyone had a similar dilemma?

TIA xx

OP posts:
fryalot · 23/04/2007 16:12

really, sounds small enough to be a village, but big enough not to have the small-minded village-ness that I was talking about before.

I want to move there myself now.

paulaplumpbottom · 23/04/2007 16:13

20 minutes isn't far go for it

Lilymaid · 23/04/2007 16:16

When your children are older you will be forever driving them into town and collecting them late at night "Mum I've missed the last bus ..."
We live in a nice village - the local green has had an ASBO on it because of the local youths congregating, the High Street was used as a race track until traffic calming measures were put in, the three schools there - infant, junior and senior have been only satisfactory at best at the times my DCs were there.
Oh, and the locals are supposed not to talk to you for the first 20 years you live there!

CantSleepWontSleep · 23/04/2007 17:42

Squonk - we're actually a mile outside the village, so our local population is 15. Do I win, do I win?

Good luck finding a property then Noonar. I think you should tell us the name of the village so we can all keep an eye out for property for you!

Glassofwine · 23/04/2007 17:48

We moved to a village a while ago from London, although we wouldn't go back we have found it hard going. However, most of the reason for this is because we miss some very good friends. If you move only 20 mins away, it's not going to be a problem. I'd go for it.

nappyaddict · 23/04/2007 17:49

you have to think about when they are older - do you want to be stuck ferrying them around because you live in the middle of nowhere?

bobsmum · 23/04/2007 17:50

Can't sleep - you've beaten us by one! We're 16 here (4 of them being our family).

The houses are on my profile

littlemissbossy · 23/04/2007 17:55

We live in a village and love it, couldn't imagine living anywhere else now TBH, although we have the best of both worlds - 10 mins drive into town and only 20 mins away from family. Noonar I would recommend spending a day/a few hours in the village/area you're thinking of moving to - go the park, go to the pub, walk around and just generally get a feel for the place if you're not sure. I actually like the fact that most people know each other - although I don't like everyone - and when you walk down the street people say hello/good morning even if they don't actually know you.
HTH

CantSleepWontSleep · 23/04/2007 17:56

Awww lovely Bobsmum. You'll be beating us by one very soon, as I think a new couple are about to move in next door (currently empty). of your waterside location.

brimfull · 23/04/2007 17:58

just remember that when your children are teenagers they will be bored to tears.
We live in a market town ,luckily d is a walk/bus away from friends and entertainment.Her friends who live in villages surrounding us all have to rely on their parents to drive them everywhere,it really curtails a teens dependence.

brimfull · 23/04/2007 17:59

curtails their INdependence

pickledpear · 23/04/2007 18:02

we live in a village after moving from surrey busy town it is so quiet but i love it. we joined the village social club and the children attend the village school and toddler groups the townis only 20 min away but we have rolling fields and downs and beach all 5 mins away too i feel we have the perfect life now we are settled with children also everyone knows each other and make new people in our village feel welcome although there are the elderly ones that are born here and never left they get irritable at some of the older teenagers that are a bit bored but on the whole it feels safe here

fennel · 23/04/2007 18:02

We moved to a village from a big city last year, we were a bit nervous about village life - all the downsides people have mentioned - but it's been great so far. People really friendly and welcoming, girls settled easily into small village school, whenever we go out we meet our new "friends" in the street, the shop, the pub etc. It doesn't seem at all insular. It seems friendlier than living in a big city, as our neighbours here really make an effort to be friendly. And people get to know each other quickly.

But our village has a lot of "incomers" and it's also only 2 miles from our local little city, so we do have the city life still within spitting distance.

bobsmum · 23/04/2007 18:11

The nearest village to us is a 15 minute drive and we've found it really welcoming. There's a fantastic community feeling running across the whole region. There's an unofficial network of about half a dozen villages so people know what's going on where and who would be a good person to chat to about X etc.

The schools are great with a family atmosphere - the dcs will be going to a primary school with 26 on the roll atm.

But we're a 45 minute drive from Glasgow so we can get the big city shopping/night out experience if we want. We're especially lucky because my parents still live in the West End of Glasgow so it's a great stopover and babysitting opportunity atm. But my parents are still in their 50s so obviously as they get older I wouldn't expect them to be our B&B in the city in the future.

All the teenagers will be in the same boat in terms of finding entertainment. There are a lot of children in our area and friendships seem to last from playgroup, so socially they won't miss out. They just won't get into Topsop quite as often as city kids - no bad thing IME.

I think parents who live here know that there is a trade off between living in a wonderfully safe, beautiful and friendly environment and driving everywhere.

TheDuchessOfNorksBride · 24/04/2007 00:43

That village sounds quite nice Bobsmum.

But I'm very happy to live at least 2 miles away from our local villages.

yaddayah · 24/04/2007 08:46

We moved to a village 4 years ago, it has a lovely primary school, 2 pubs and a postoffice/cum shop, it took us a very long year (of me going in with baby every day to the shop) to get properly accepted (shop is notourious as owner is the parish council leader and very much "league of gentlemen" .. now when i go in with the kids its all smiles .. when dh goes in on his own he still gets the "outsider" grunt/silent treatment .. with me its ..how are you ?

Nowt so strange as folk !

You have to make the effort, i help out at the school, dh now helps the village hall committee and has joined the pub darts team
That said we do love it .. when we go back to "town" its o dirty and noisy

dh still winges when he gets stuck behind a tractor/horse though

hth

GooseyLoosey · 24/04/2007 08:59

Try it - moved to our village 8 years ago and hope never to leave. We live in a larger village (pop about 1300) with a scholl, 3 pubs a cafe and 3 shops. It is a very welcoming village but I know others who have moved places that are not friendly and even after several years they remain outsiders.

If the village is as large as you say, there must be a toddler group. Could you take your LO to the toddler group and see how you like the other mothers?

SSShakeTheChi · 24/04/2007 09:00

what's a scholl?

GooseyLoosey · 24/04/2007 09:01

Sorry, its what you get when you cross a new "ergonomically designed" key board and an inability to proof read with a school!

SSShakeTheChi · 24/04/2007 09:01

oh Ok Was wondering what groovey things you village people have that we city dwellers miss out on!

elasticbandstand · 24/04/2007 09:28

special shoes, scholls arent they?

i was just going to mention, but has been done already, the ferrying of teenagers around. that was my first concern when i moved. i grew up in a village too... but we made our own amusement

i think whatever you do teenagers will struggle to be satisfied.

yaddayah · 24/04/2007 09:42

Don't underestimate the extra travelling as well.. do you/dp have to commute to work ? That extra 20 mins = 40 mins extra each day plus the extra parking costs/hassle .. we have a 30min drive to the nearest station its a killer, the only real downer, plus parking costs have doubled in the 4 years we've been here.

We have had to get a new community funded (via council tax) policewoman who patrols as dusk due to vandalism of the village hall(pesky bored teens)

The sole m and t group was run by a very bossy horsey type (complete with braying large bottomed sycophants)so i never bothered with that which was a shame )

Winge over, when we're off for a walk in the woods, its fab

fryalot · 24/04/2007 09:49

Extra travelling is a bummer. Not so much for me, but dp works in the nearest city - 35 miles away, which makes a 70 mile round trip, which is 300 odd miles a week.

Just getting to work.

He has to leave our house at 7 to get to work at a reasonable time, which means him getting up at 6.

Obviously, this doesn't bother me as long as he's quiet

Enid · 24/04/2007 10:54

our village is tiny (has a school and pub and strange post office)

it is a hotbed of miserable old folk who hate people who aren't farmers

I am not a joiner so hate all the committees and crap that goes on

it is pretty though

fryalot · 24/04/2007 11:01

Is your post office ever actually open, enid?