Let me explain the PFB (Precious First Born) thing...

[SoupDragon]

First of all, you simply won't get it if you only have a firstborn
Second, it's not about the child actually being more precious than any subsequent children. I love all 3 of mine equally but I can not deny that DS1 was treated far more preciously than DS2 or DD.

Some examples:

DS1: I would have passionately fought off any child or whatever age who came anywhere near him as a baby.
DS2: I smiled indulgently as DS1 and friends investigated/played with him
DD: I let her get poked and prodded by an entire class of 30 reception age children without batting an eyelid.

DS1: Always clean, nappy-changed and properly dressed and fed before going anywhere
DS2: Sometimes changed/fed/dressed when we arrived somewhere rather than before we left to go there
DD: Don't always rememeber to check what state she's in before going awywhere.

It's about little things that you look back on and laugh at yourself when/if you have a subsequent child. When I only had DS1 I would have sworn I was laid back and calm about stuff (and I was compared to friends etc). Then I had DS2. Then I had DD and realised just how neglectful you can be and they'll still survive

It's also something you must never, ever point out to a parent of a PFB if you spot typical behaviour. You just have to smile to yourself and remember how it used to be... Sometimes I hanker after the simplicity of my PFB days. Sigh.

And Neglected Subsequent Children (NSC)...

DD is my third - the Midwife called me a "casual" mother... I am sure she meant to say confident

[recognises self]

and by your birth it's a bit oh yes you need feeding/changing/dressing at some point too don't you..........when you've suddenly remembered that you've actually got a 4th......

You would never wipe a pfb's face with a kitchn cloth for instance

all that PFB no sugary biscuits I have some rice cakes, no squash or juice he only drinks water. Second born anything goes!

THE BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN

Your Clothes:
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your doctor confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

Preparing for the Birth:
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month

The Layette:
1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

Worries:
1st baby: At the first sign of distress-a whimper, a frown-you pick up the baby.
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Pacifier:
1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Diapering:
1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

Activities:
1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out:
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home:
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!!

that is brilliant

I was thinking of the phrase today when I saw a couple with a tiny baby at the pool--

the baby was in an inflatable seat with arm bands on and given a teddy float--

just in case the daddy should let go, I suppose.

I took ds1 to the doctor once, because his feet had gone a funny colour.

he said "he's probably a little bit cold. Put an extra blanket on him"

i demanded top know how thick, cotton, cellular, what?

the Doctor said, "Oh, er, a fleece or something?"

"I DO NOT USE FLEECES, THEY ARE DANGEROUS!"

Not only dangerous, but as I discovered with number two, very tumble drier friendly too.

izzybiz - the coil swallowing is brilliant - PMSL

Coin - not coil - coin

When dd1 went to nursery, she took with her a home made personalised drawstring bag with gingham patches etc. All the nursery nurses oohed and aahed over it.

When dd2 went to nursery, her spare clothes were stuffed that morning into a LIDL carrier bag with her name scrawled on in permanent marker.

It definitely crystallised the PFB syndrome for me[grin.

I don't get the pfb syndrome at all. I was so ignorant with ds1, and he was such an obliging soul, that I gaily sailed through with him, no sweat.

By the time I had ds2, 4yrs later, I had been 'educated' about all the pitfalls and disasters awaiting us. That, combined with his very different personality meant I worried myself nearly to death over him. Then the next baby was that alien species, a girl, so that was more stuff to fret over and the fourth one I worried about because I had her in my dotage. I think I'm just one of life's worriers.

Being a second child I dont like this PFB shite

I am a 3rd born - my mum struggles to remember anything about my baby years!

Soupy an excellent thread

With my first I took photos every five minutes
I only have about six photos of my second

With my first I could tell you every word she knew
My second says things like "HEAVY MUMMY!" when I pass her a carrier bag of tins to carry home (she is 1)

this is brilliant !!

DS had co-ordinated outfits, matching socks and hats......his flannel for bath time matched his bath towel , which matched his blankets, curtains, frieze, lampshade, nappy holder etc

everything was perfect, neat , and ordered! every meal in a high chair, with bowls ,spoons,beakers all matching, all crumbs whisked away, outfit changed if he got a splash of food on it...highchair swabbed down after ...

DD well, dressed, yes, no outfits, and we are down to about 4 pairs of socks that are an indeterminate shade of mucky pink, i run a j-cloth over her once in a while and hurl food in her general direction...! BLW , doncha know

LOL

I am second (and last) born.

My mum can tell you the time, day, weather and news of the day my brother was born.

My mum can tell you what my brother's first words were, what he wore on his first day at nursery, what his first best friends were called, how old he was when he first sat up/crawled/walked...

When I ask about my birth or milestones, mum says...." oh well, you know, you forget...."

Not that I'm bitter or anything.

I shudder to think just how inferior I'd have been with a third or - OMG - fourth Inferiorette.

i am first born, but of a set of twins, so it is different, younger brother gets the 'golden child treatment' from the grannies !

lots of pics of all 3 of us and mum seems to remember all the relevant stuff!

did make sure my sister always remembered i am 10 minutes older than her ! it matters you know !!

I was a 4th born girl.. my eldest sister swears she raised me..

I cant wait for baby no 2 so I can try out this relaxed lark!

I've always called it Firstbabyitis.
It's worse for subsequent babies when they are very close in age. A 4yr+ gap and the older one/s at school allows for a reprise in the form of Last Ever Baby syndrome.

bucket.. thats buggered me then as ds is already 7 so will deff have lastbabyitits as well as first mbaby syndrome and dp will have first baby syndrome and last baby itis all at the same time..

poor kid!! lol

I'm the youngest of six and I'm not sure my Mum can even remember which I am sometimes - it usually takes my Dad a few attempts to get it right - do I look like a Barry? Well? Do I????.

The fondest memories my sisters have of me as a baby is prodding me through the cot bars so that I'd wake and cry and they'd then drag me out (they were seven, six and six at the time) over the top. One of the six year olds insisted on getting up to give me my 6am feed every morning, something I thought cute until I had my own and realised that at 6am you want to do a feed as quickly as possible!