Mornington Crescent....

[BratFarrarsPony]

Well as I won the last game fairly and squarely despite not being as quick as the old lags....I will start another game.

Gants Hill

Whence we shall hotfoot it to

Milton North

Now the election is over.

We return to the real world. From Milton North to Milton Keynes Central

Well, where else can it be now but

Kensington High Street

I think we can make a short move to Notting Hill Gate

Moves that short leave the Jubilee Line in thiddings and are best avoided.

As an antidote to which: Hainault

So, if we're playing Francophone moves

Paris Gare du Nord

Obviously then Bruxelles - Gare du Midi

Well, my diary has unexpectedly opened up, so instead of guiding the country towards a bright future I have nothing better to do than dally on this sadly amateur thread.

In tribute to M Macron: Paris Louvre

Oh dear, Irene. Your sorrows come not as single spies, do they? Losing your place in the cabinet must have been bad enough, but to lose your seat and also your deposit must have been galling. Still, I think I know how to cheer you up:

Rotterdam Centraal

Monsieur Macron would be horrified at the failure to acknowledge that there are two stations near the Musee de Louvre. So we have to go back to the Belgian capital, and I therefore move to Gent St Pieters, to use the Flemish pronunciation.

IrenetheQuaint should have taken up the offer of the post in the Foreign Office.

Irene When they find you another seat, this time do not issue a manifesto promising the voters that if they elect you the taps will run with Moet Chandon and their babies' nappies will smell of Chanel No. 9 - or vice versa.

The Lieutenant-Colonel says she's sorry she missed the party and the Party but of course we all know why.

Den Haag for yet more |Dutch courage.

Thanks for the support, everyone. I can't believe how ungrateful my constituents are. I was sure that my recent appearance on the front of the local rag cutting the ribbon of the new Substance Abuse Centre while offering champagne cocktails and spliffs all round would have cemented my generous majority :(

Meh. 's-Hertogenbosch

They can be so ungrateful, can't they? Perhaps, as dear Bertolt intimated, we should dissolve the electorate and elect another.

Antwerpen-Centraal

Antwerpen Centraal is a very beautiful station and there is a lovely Argentinian steak restaurant nearby. As i do not quaff champagne I cannot comment on whether or not it is available, and in any case have abjured the grape since the incident of 2004 whilst on a hiatus from playing MC. In any case a city that wore poppies in October 2014 to commemorate Flanders Fields and the deaths in what they called the Grote Oorlog deserves our respect.

So I shall remain in this city a while longer by travelling to Antwerpen Berchem

Dear Bertolt indeed. Not a bad amateur Crescenter either: he one came fourth in the heats for the Schleswig-Holstein Under-7 Championship.

Breda I do declare - as Charles II said.

You know, I have a feeling I may have quoted that line by Brecht in my concession speech. Unfortunately not everyone will have heard it as my oration was rather rudely interrupted by two well-built men who were determined to help me find the way out.

I'm feeling Imperial: Aachen (or should I say Aix-la-Chapelle? I can't locate my 1922 rulebook, which I know covers the issue).

You're very fortunate to have that 1922 rule book, Irene. Most copies were confiscated and burned after that appalling incident in Epping Forest in '49 which left the members of the MC Council in therapy, traction or both.

Bruxelles Gare du Midi

Maud into pip you go. I took us there within the last 72 hours.

And it wasn't Epping Forest, that was where the rozzers were tipped off to go so that they wouldn't interrupt the fun. It was Hornchurch

I think that we are now able to move towards zone 1, so it is to Stepney Green

Oh drat.

I have been somewhat distracted recently. I just can't get Theresa off the phone. She's ringing at all hours of the day and night, sobbing hysterically and demanding I advise her what to do. As I keep telling her, the answers to all life's questions are in the codicils to the Great and Amended Consolidation of MC Rules (1961, abridged) but of course these days it's only available at that backstreet librairie-papeterie in Toulouse ("knock twice and ask for Armand") and one needs a personal recommendation.

So I'll just take the phone off the hook and bide my time in pip.

The MC Council has met on the phone and lifted the pip - we need all the talent MC can muster. But Maud do stop wasting your time with amateurs. Get onto Amazon and send TM a copy of the Ladybird book (I think it is called My first trip on the Central Line) and leave her to it, but send it Prime - she might not be there long and that chsppie with the grey beard doesn't look as if he has much grasp of the basics of MC.

In the present dire emergency I hit the Big Red Button and Cookham calls.

Cookham? Wow! We are living in interesting times. I'm playing a reverse alphabetical to

Bookham

I'm grateful for the lifting of the pip, by the way. I knew my very good friends on the MC Council - dear Wilfred especially - would see sense.

Towards London we go and it is on to Surbiton

As you say, Maud, Wilfred has been much kinder since the Wilfreda days. Remember when she kicked the shit out of two abbots and a Chief Constable for playing Northallerton in the Team Relays - was it Trieste '77?

Moor Park

Oh and some good news. Somebody has filled the chocolate machine on Platform 8 at . . . no, why should I tell you that?

Brian Cant has died. May he rest in peace. No idea if he played MC, but his final residence was in Hillingdon and so a move there seems fitting.