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Original poster

put my foot in it - please help me decide what to do

32 replies

opengobeforethinkingagain · 06/02/2007 20:47

Ok, my quandry is this - we were all standing around chatting at school gates and along comes a Land Rover which backs into a space randomly without any indication, almost taking out a fiesta in the process. I made a remark about the careleessnesss of this manoever (?sp) others agreed and made remarks such as 'aah well you're not going to come off worse if you're on a 4x4 ha ha', to which I said 'don't get me started on 4x4s'. I may have redeemed myself slightly by adding a little snippet about apparently Mini Coopers being environmentally worse than 4x4s or so I'd heard on some TV debate.
I then realised on the walk up the school path that the husband of one of the women present drives a f*k off huge Land Rover.
I feel awful because this person has a lot of things on her plate atm and I don't want to think I've upset her
Now, do I

  1. Mention it tomorrow and apologise for possibly offending her with my obvious disdain for 4x4s.
  2. say nothing, and hope I can redeem myself at a future date.

Pelase tell me I'm not the only one who opens their mouth before thinking - I think I get nervous and go on verbal overdrive in an attempt to make friends. Must stop, must stop.

OP posts:
Hulababy · 06/02/2007 20:48

Say nothing.

fryalot · 06/02/2007 20:49

Don't have any worthy advice; just wanted to say something in sympathy with you.

MrsBadger · 06/02/2007 20:50

say nothing

it's her DH who drives it, not her - doubt she'll hold it against you

ThisTime · 06/02/2007 20:50

I would have to say something as it would be on my mind until I could think of something to redeem myself.

southeastastra · 06/02/2007 20:52

stick to your principles and go on about how bad they are everytime you see her

malaleche · 06/02/2007 20:53

i would mention it - say something like 'hope you werent offended by what i said yesterday about 4x4s - id completely forgotton you have one! and then laugh.
Hopefully she'll see the funny side, or maybe she didnt even feel you were refering to her in the first place...
good luck

Hallgerda · 06/02/2007 20:55

Several years ago I made a rather tactless remark about Daily Telegraph readers to some friends in a train. The friends noticed that the person sitting opposite us was reading the Daily Telegraph - I hadn't spotted that .

So, no, you're not alone.

In your situation I wouldn't apologise as a) you're entitled to your opinion and b) just because someone's married to a 4x4 driver that doesn't mean she approves of the things.

WWWCampbellBlack · 06/02/2007 20:57

Say nothing, it'll make a bigger deal of it than it is. Honestly. You're entitled to your opinion anyway. And they are evil

Original poster
opengobeforethinkingagain · 06/02/2007 20:59

I did worry that by syaing something I'm making into something bigger than it is. But I know that I'm fretting so much about it now, can I sit on it and not mention anything?
I've thought of a third option....metnion to one of her friends that I'd put my foot in it and feel shitty about it knowing it would get back to her????

OP posts:
southeastastra · 06/02/2007 21:02

seriously don't worry, maybe she has a horse so is justified in having one

paulaplumpbottom · 06/02/2007 21:10

I would mention that in hindsight it wasn't the right thing to say. Say you are embarrased. I bet she thinks its funny.

Original poster
opengobeforethinkingagain · 06/02/2007 21:26

sorry - forgot to say to squonk. I think my first ever MN post was on a thread v similar to the one you started and I didn't explain myself properly and was pounced upon for the wrong reasons. [empathy emotion]

OP posts:
Original poster
opengobeforethinkingagain · 06/02/2007 21:29

5:3 in favour of saying nothing at the moment. Thank you ...any more??

OP posts:
Califrau · 06/02/2007 21:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Marina · 06/02/2007 21:34

Say nothing

pointydog · 06/02/2007 21:39

Say nothing.

You're right .

She either won't mind or she will. Saying something won't make any difference.

themildmanneredjanitor · 06/02/2007 21:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sheraz · 06/02/2007 21:42

SAy nothing would she really be botheres that you don't like her car? Wouldn't bother me.

Original poster
opengobeforethinkingagain · 06/02/2007 21:49

Late run of votes there - thank you!!
I think the decision has been made. Now I just have to keep my mouth shut and try to redeem myself...but probably not try so hard to be liked by going on verbal overdrive I think! I never did the mother and toddler group thing when working p-t and this whole school gates club really unnerves me.

OP posts:
Bekks · 06/02/2007 21:50

Say nothing, it's not really news that people don't like 4x4s, she's probably used to it. You can't really take back what you said, so it just has the potential to get worse. It'll be forgotten in a couple of days.

Sheraz · 06/02/2007 21:50

Know what you mean sometimes utter garbage comes out of my mouth just to keep a conversation going!

time4me · 06/02/2007 21:55

say nowt

GhostOfMumsnet · 06/02/2007 21:58

I'm concerned about the Mini Cooper comment. Is that true???????? I love my cooper.

I don't think your comment was too bad and I wouldn't worry.

Bucketsofdynomite · 06/02/2007 22:25

Say nothing, it'll only embarrass her more although TBH I'm sure it's not the first time she's heard things like that.

liquidclocks · 06/02/2007 22:29

say nothing - just because she's having a rough time doesn't get her off driving a 4x4!