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Original poster

Mumsnet Wedding Planners required please

43 replies

lilibet · 27/05/2004 18:45

ok, I know you all love talking about your weddings and coming up with ideas for other peoples, so I need a few suggestions about mine. Nothing sorted at all yet, not got a big budget, and it's my second time. We are hoping for sometime early next year, maybe spring? I did the big traditional thing first time and now we would both like something different to that. I'm a christian but our vicar doesn't marry divorcees, so sunk there, but as my Dad died a few years back don't fancy the walk down the aise anyway ( I have no male relations). Not bothered about having a civil ceremony, God will be there with us anyway.
We found a lovely hotel in Buxton which is a special place for us and about 50 miles from where we live, but that would mean that everyone who we invited would have to fork out around £130 per couple just to attend and I know that an awful lot of our frinds/family couldn't afford that.
the other thing is who to invite, dp's family is quite large and very close, if we invitd just the 'core' you are talking in the 30/40 region, I however have a mum and three children (only child of only children!)so it would seem strange and one sided inviting just relations, but to invite my freinds and not his to even things up isn't really a nice thing to do.

All these thoughts and we are only breaking it to the children/ parents this weekend!!

OP posts:
Original poster
lilibet · 28/05/2004 16:16

Oh Northerner, what a wonderful job!! I could choose loads of readings, but have always wondeered why its not allowed any religious bits?

What are the vows yousay - don't expect you to remember word for word, but how much do they differ from church ones?

OP posts:
Northerner · 28/05/2004 16:23

Lillibet there are a number of different vows you can choose - your registrar will advise you on these. They range from very basic to quite slushy. Dh and I promised to love, honour, cherish and respect.

Original poster
lilibet · 28/05/2004 16:29

Don't suppose there's anything in there about promising always being the one to lock up at night?

OP posts:
Northerner · 28/05/2004 16:31

You can write your own so you could put that in!

Northerner · 28/05/2004 16:35

You can still walk down the aisle aswell.

Have you booked the venue yet? If you are on a tight budget have you thought about a non peak day? Saturdays are prime wedding days so v expensive. Some venues offer reductions on Friday and Sunday weddings. They'll try to sting you on room hire for the ceremony, definatley haggle here and they will reduce. Tell a little lie - say XXXXX hotel up the road (name a local competitor) is quoting XXX can you match it?

Any more questions just ask!

Original poster
lilibet · 28/05/2004 16:49

Not sure about the walking down the aisle thing - don't have a Dad alive and am not one for grand entrances, would like us to go in together

It woudl probably be a Friday or a Sunday but we cant fix a date till we have sold dps house and then have some idea of budget. I do like to plan ahead! There is a link to the hotel we fancy further down.

Only telling the parents on Sunday!!!!!!!!

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Northerner · 28/05/2004 16:52

Just looked at it - it looks lovely. Perfect for a wedding.

collision · 28/05/2004 17:13

Am organising a wedding next week for some people I know through friends. It is in Tuscany at the local Reg Office which is a castle on a hill and has fab views. Then they are having champagne and canapes at the park and then to our restaurant for lunch.....4 courses and wine. There are only 10 of them and so they have been able to bring the price down! Ryanair do cheap flights to Pisa.

Come to me and I will do the whole thing!!!!

Tinker · 28/05/2004 17:22

collision - that sounds fantastic. I'd consider marriage if it was like that!

lilibet - it's not the same hotel then. Drat, was hoping to be useful.

Tinker · 28/05/2004 17:24

Agree about civil cermonies being just as emotional - went to one at Brighton Registry Office and everyone was crying.

Original poster
lilibet · 28/05/2004 17:24

Which is it Tinker, didn't know there was another one in Buxton that does weddings?

Tuscany sighhhhhhhhhh

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WideWebWitch · 29/05/2004 09:16

Ah, lilibet, how exciting! This all sounds lovely! We're going to get married too at some point and will be going for registry office and cheap ish too. Ikwym about the who to invite dilemma, it's a hard one isn't it? Agree with eddm though, invite the people you two want to invite. Our local youth hostel reckoned about 1,500GBP to hire the whole place for a night - so that includes accommodation for about 30 people, so I agree, might be worth contacting your local one. Some of them are lovely buildings. Or could you have a posh picnic? I've been contacting local big estates/parks and so far they seem to be ok with the idea. I know it depends on the weather on the day though. Readings - you need to check these are ok with the registrar first, I think - I had a poem turned down the first time I got married (cheeky bastards imo, who are they to make subjective judgements about what poetry is and isn't appropriate? It wasn't for religious reasons either) so just bear that in mind. Just googled trying to find the exact wording for a civil ceremony and didn't get anything, how annoying. Enid had lots of ideas on her thread too, I'll see if I can find it.

WideWebWitch · 29/05/2004 09:18

Haven't read it again so it might not be helpful but enid's thread is here

littlerach · 29/05/2004 10:10

We walked down the aisle together at our wedding, a civil ceremony in a hotel.
Our guests travelled about 100 miles, and most were happy to stay there, quite pricey, many made it into a weekend away. The rest found B&B's in the area.
Make sure you do what you want to do!!!

Original poster
lilibet · 29/05/2004 10:46

What poem was it that you couldn't have www? I'm going to ask a very arty friend to do my invites and have on the front of them the first line of a poem in gold writing and a small red rose, then the second line will be on the front bit of the insert (does that make sense?) and then would like the whole poem read out at the service, but now you have got me worried

Mine is:-

The life that I have is all that I have
and the life that I have is yours
The love that I have of the life that I have
is yours and yours and yours
A sleep I shall have, a rest I shall have
and death will be but a pause
for the peace of my years in the long green grass
will be yours and yours and yours

only problem is it wasn't written as a love poem but as a code for spies in the second world war!!!!!!!!!!

OP posts:
Tinker · 29/05/2004 11:02

It's this one lilibet

Original poster
lilibet · 29/05/2004 11:18

Oh, that looks lovely too, tell me all about it next week Tinker. Where in Buxton is it?

OP posts:
Tinker · 29/05/2004 11:22

Just by to the station, up on a bit of a hill.

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