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Original poster

Have you kept your maiden name for work?

40 replies

TheDullWitch · 09/11/2006 15:03

I have been amazed recetly by younger colleagues who change their names the moment they get married even after years spent building up their names and reputations in business. In my feminist day, you kept your name at least for work, were proud to do so. But now I think these women are just gagging for everyone to know they've bagged a husband.

OP posts:
LadyPenelope · 09/11/2006 15:09

Yep and as a result I ended up using in for 100% outside work too.

dinosaur · 09/11/2006 15:10

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justaphase · 09/11/2006 15:12

I kept mine, for work and outside work.

Ds has dh's surname which tends to confuse people.

Original poster
TheDullWitch · 09/11/2006 15:13

I just looked at my cheque book and passport and imagined having them changed to his name. It just seemed a weird idea. Though lots of women I know who have given up their own names insist their child has a double barrelled name ie Oliver Mumsname-Dadsname. Which seems like another bit of vanity.

OP posts:
pamina3 · 09/11/2006 15:13

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dinosaur · 09/11/2006 15:17

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Original poster
TheDullWitch · 09/11/2006 15:17

No one seems to use Ms any more either. I feel a right hairy legged old feminist if I have to give my title.

OP posts:
motherinferior · 09/11/2006 15:18

I am not a Maiden, I am a Laydee.

Mind you, have never managed to bag a husband.

dinosaur · 09/11/2006 15:20

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mumfor1standfinaltime · 09/11/2006 15:21

I have changed my Maiden name on everything and ds has dh's name. I have the 'old fashioned' approach to it all I guess. I like the idea of being Mrs.Dh. On our honeymoon I changed my passport before I married which was very weird!

My maiden name wasn't much to shout about either, it was unusual, always spelt wrong and annoying!

motherinferior · 09/11/2006 15:22

I like having a name which is unusual and everyone always spells wrong.

mumfor1standfinaltime · 09/11/2006 15:22

What is 'Ms'anyway, have never known . Is it meaning 'I don't want to tell you if I'm married or single?'

dinosaur · 09/11/2006 15:23

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Blandmum · 09/11/2006 15:26

I have kept my name for everything.

I am known as Mrs Bishop, in school but everywhere else I use Ms. Kids don't 'get' Ms.

motherinferior · 09/11/2006 15:26

Ms means I'm female. Rather like Mr means I'm male (I mean if I were male which I'm not). Marital status, in both cases, is irrelevant.

mumfor1standfinaltime · 09/11/2006 15:27

Ah I see, so it does mean that then! A 'grown up' Miss! lol.

Blandmum · 09/11/2006 15:28

Thank you MI, very well put. I would also say female and adult. So master=miss
Ms=Mr

mumfor1standfinaltime · 09/11/2006 15:29

Or a 'I'm not going to let on I'm married'.

Seems weird to me. Why hide the fact of being married/unmarried?

Blandmum · 09/11/2006 15:31

For me it was never that.

Men get called Mr when they become older teens, adults. It shows that they are adults.

Women only get the 'respect' of Mrs when they get married IYSWIM......adn Mrs is a respectful title......cooks etc in service were always called Mrs to show them more respect than the skullery maids etc, regarless of teir marital statur=s.

For me Ms means an adult woman

zippy34 · 09/11/2006 15:31

I started to change my name on everything and then got bored.

Result: passport, payslip, medical records in married name & bank accounts, driving license and various other bits in "maiden" name.

It hasn't seemed to make much difference tbh and noone official has bothered that I have 2 names. Eventually I suppose I'll move over to everything being in my married name. It sounds better than my original name so I'm not sorry about it - and I had no particular fantastic rep to worry about at work.

I like that we share a family name. Dh has very little contact with his family and would have been happy to take my name, or we could have chosen a neutral name to share but I was happy to just be Mrs Conventional...

foxinsocks · 09/11/2006 15:33

I do/did but largely because my nickname is based around my surname and also the form to change my work email address to my married name was about 4 pages long and had to be done in duplicate

motherinferior · 09/11/2006 15:34

I don't want my partner's name. He's a different person from me. I like the fact my daughters have a different name from both of us. They're separate people from their parents. We all seem to manage the claustrophobic business of family (shudder) life fairly well despite it all.

stleger · 09/11/2006 15:34

When I got married I kept my 'own' name, as did a few others I knew. I have noticed this name change thing too, recently, and was amazed when a colleage of my husband's, who had published on book in her 'family' name then published her next book in her 'new' name.

mumfor1standfinaltime · 09/11/2006 15:35

You can get fined for not changing your name on certain documents I always thought, for example driving licence? Have never understood how anyone can be Mrs on car insurance (for example) and then Miss on their licence - is this legal?

motherinferior · 09/11/2006 15:36

You can get fined for not changing your name to a man's name solely because you've married him?????