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Original poster

Taking other peoples children to the toilet

37 replies

PopeyesPiece · 20/04/2004 14:33

I went to a party for my friends daughter and the ages group seemed to be mostly around 5ish. Mums had dropped off their children to collect later. While the entertainer was on, several children came to me asking to take them to the loo, which I did, didn't have to wipe any bottoms etc but had to wait for them to finish.

I wasn't at all concerned about this but another mum said that she would be as you never know these days what you can be accused of. I hadn't even considered this but I have been thinking since that she may have a point.

What does anyone else think?

I only know 2 children at the party so the ones I took were 'strangers'

OP posts:
Bron · 20/04/2004 14:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

motherinferior · 20/04/2004 14:40

Erk, Bron, my dd1 did this when taken the other day, ahem, came back saying loudly and proudly I Did A Poo...

marialuisa · 20/04/2004 14:46

This may sound paranoid but when this happens i always make a point of telling the parent. E.g. " X had a problem with the zip on his trousers so I undid it for him and then he asked me to wipe his bum". Had some odd looks, but....

Codswallop · 20/04/2004 14:47

I never think twice
Honselty this paranoia about inteference has gone mad!

twiglett · 20/04/2004 21:13

message withdrawn

emmatmg · 20/04/2004 21:14

Ditto coddy and twiglett.

Lisa78 · 20/04/2004 21:15

with coddy and twiglett

Lisa78 · 20/04/2004 21:15

coddy and twiglett for MP

dinosaur · 20/04/2004 21:17

I wouldn't be concerned about doing it, but I would probably mention that I had done so to the other mum(s).

monkeygirl · 20/04/2004 21:18

Surely the alternative would be worse (ie letting them pee or poo in their pants or on your carpet!!)?

collision · 20/04/2004 21:18

With Coddy.....wouldnt think twice!

My sis did work exp at a school of nursery children and one 4 yr old had pooed in her pants. NO-ONE did anything to help her or sort her out and the child had to sit in poo all afternoon. My sis was really sad about it but wasnt allowed to help her.

IMO the child would have been embarrassed and traumatised by the whole thing. The world has gone mad when you cant help children to the loo and i feel very angry just thinking about it.

Browbeaten · 20/04/2004 21:24

Reading this threat reminds me of when my mum came on a school trip with me when I was an Junior school - probably 8 yo. We went to a forest and one of the boys in my group fell in a muddy bog and was completely covered from the waist down. My mum as group leader took him into the toilets and stripped him down to nothing and proceeded to wash him everywhere. He couldn't have managed on his own. I still see this guy around town and we are in our 30's and he still reminds of the incident, gratefully. Times have changed.

eddm · 20/04/2004 21:25

Oh she's making a fuss about nothing IMO what were you supposed to do, tell them to hang on until after the party?!
I took a friend's 3 yr old to the loo, which was an experience for me as my ds only 9 months. She kept telling me 'my poo's not coming'! Not true, there was LOTS of it and unfortunately I had to handle the flush. One of those things that means you are a mummy

tamum · 20/04/2004 21:26

Blimey, I can honestly say it's never crossed my mind to worry about it or to mention it to other parents.

sargentmajorBeetroot · 20/04/2004 21:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
PopeyesPiece · 21/04/2004 10:08

Oh good, glad it's not only me then. If dd went to a party and wanted the loo I would want her taken and not left with wet pants until I came to collect her.

Paranoia gone mad sometimes isn't it?

Collison - why wasn't your sister allowed to help, was it because she was work experience or is it a rule not to change children at nurseries?

OP posts:
tiredemma · 21/04/2004 10:28

god collision! if either of my boys were at that nursery id be seriously pissed off if they left one of them to sit in his own poo all afternoon.
the nursery that my two go to will give them a clean change of pants, i dont agree with just leaving them!

i agree with coddy and twiglett etc, i can understand some people may be wary in case of being accused of interfering, but its a bit of a paranoid way to live.

starry · 21/04/2004 20:58

God...I hadn't given it a thought till now !

I keep getting a bit annoyed with DS1's nursery. He is almost 4 and has come home with pooey pants on occasion. When I told him to ask one of the assistants to help him wipe his bum he says he does but x or so and so said he has to do it himself Am I expecting too much? It's fine that he tries to wipe himself but they could just cjeck to make sure he's done it properly couldn't they. He got quite upset the other day and said to me in frustration 'I always ask them for hepl but so and so said I have to do it myself'

collision · 21/04/2004 21:02

I think there are new laws about these things and no one was allowed to help her. How horrible for her. My sister was also told not to hug or touch any of the children as that is no longer allowed for any teacher either. Amy said it was really hard as the children who were just 4 were so sweet and wanted to hold her hand at playtime but she wasnt allowed. So sad.

Codswallop · 21/04/2004 21:04

no my ds2 is always smelling of the nurses perfume

I love it

Codswallop · 21/04/2004 21:04

( that they find him so cuddle able)

pollyanna · 21/04/2004 21:06

I don't give it a second thought either, but my dh was with someone elses little girl and he had to take her to the loo (there wasn't really any alternative)and her mother wasn't too pleased.

Ronniebaby · 21/04/2004 21:53

I'm with all the others I wouldnt even think about it I'd just do it.

Altho at a wedding on saturday, my Ds went into the ladies with out me but couldnt undo his belt, so he asked a women in there who helped, when I walked in she did look embarrassed and explained what she'd done, I just shrugged and said, great, thanks a lot.

Then he was playing with one fo the ushers who he didnt know and followed him into the loo, he asked Steve to undo his belt and Steve got all embarrassed, but did it, he then came straight out , and explained it to me, saying he felt uncomfortable, but didnt want my DS to wet himself, plus Steve was just about to pee himself.

Kids dont really care who helps them as long as the dont pee themselves

Society has made being a parent or just living really crazy.

Also I would leave my DS at a party on his own and collect him later and he is nearly 4, he'd never let me and I wouldnt do it either, who was keeping an eye on those kids???

bunny2 · 21/04/2004 21:56

Perhaps it's just me, I cant stand being anywhere near poo, excpet ds' of course. I could never wipe another childs bum, I think I would be throw up.

marialuisa · 22/04/2004 09:18

It's interesting to see how differently nurseries/schools interpret the new legislation. My DD's school is a very "huggy" place, DD has been known to cuddle the rather gruff HM and certainly no probs with helping kids after accidents. my sister's nursery (attached to state primary) would not even pull down her tights to clean up a cut knee and sis was too upset to do it herself. When mum collected her the blood/tight gunge was terrible and she had to cut most of the tights off before trying to deal with the bits that were stuck in the cut. Nobody had cuddled her/sat her on their knee either

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