Taking other peoples children to the toilet

[PopeyesPiece]

I went to a party for my friends daughter and the ages group seemed to be mostly around 5ish. Mums had dropped off their children to collect later. While the entertainer was on, several children came to me asking to take them to the loo, which I did, didn't have to wipe any bottoms etc but had to wait for them to finish.

I wasn't at all concerned about this but another mum said that she would be as you never know these days what you can be accused of. I hadn't even considered this but I have been thinking since that she may have a point.

What does anyone else think?

I only know 2 children at the party so the ones I took were 'strangers'

i hadn't thought about this until now either. but surely by leaving a child the parents are indirectly giving permission, to those she's left with, to care for her. and this would include making sure she was OK in the loos.

Oh dear, thank you eddm, that's my dd1 all right

Maybe I'm naive but it had never even occured to me that it would be a problem. I would always take a child to the loo if they asked me - rather that than they have an accident. And I would hope anyone would do the same for my boys.

Dh had taken ds1 to his swimming lesson and they were running late. He'd just got ds1 ready when one of the boys out of his class aged about five came into the changing rooms. He was struggling with his wet trunks and dancing around. Dh asked him if he was okay and he said he needed a wee but couldn't undo his trunks. Dh helped the boy and then tied them back up for him before sending them both through to the lesson. He said he felt funny about it but the dad in him had to help the poor child because his own dad was to busy reading the paper to notice his son wasn't in the pool.

Also ds1's school are very good. He has a bit of problem and quite frequently soils his trousers. I have lost count of the number of times they have cleaned him up and changed his underpants and trousers. I know they aren't supposed to but I am glad that they have or else I'd never have been away from the place. I've also had phone calls when he's had accidents asking permission to deal with his injuries. I was even called and asked to bring in some cream to put on a rope burn he'd got whilst playing in the yard.

My father works at the school and he finds it so frustrating not being able help children. I think a lot of parent's feel the same.

at ds's nursery, the nursery manager ( who is a lovely young woman) actually gives each of the children a kiss, in front of thier parents before they leave.
i have never thought anything of it, its such a shame that genuine carers of children cannot show them affection nowadays, i understand the reasons why, but its sad to think that we have to be completly wary of everyone, even if they have passed thier relevant police checks and have been deemed safe to care for children.

I haven't been in this kind of situation yet but if children were left in my care then i would take that as an admission to take them to the loo if needed unless i was told otherwise.

I would always be cautious about these things though. I used to wotk with kids in care and you ALWAYS had to watch each others back for things like this, not getting yourself inot a tricky situation but sometimes it just can't be helped.

I can't imagine NOT helping a child even if i were unsure as i couldn't stand and watch a child wee itself and feel humiliated because of our grown up worries!!

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It makes me terribly sad to read this posts...consider the following:

Many children spend:
...12 hrs sleeping
... 1 hrs feeding and getting ready to go to the nursery
...7 hrs in nursery
... 1/2 hr in "nursery runs"
... 1/2 hr playing on their own while mom prepares dinner
... 1 hr having dinner
... 1/2 hr in the bath

When a child doesn't speak the only way he could know that he is loved is through cuddles and hugs, if those are not provided at the nursery, then after all the day routine there is only 1.5 hrs a day when he can receive that touch of love that will build his confidence.

Isn't that far too little??? if they are not hugged or cuddled at nursery even if they have had some accident what kind of care are some nurseries providing? is that the equivalent of having a hamster in its cage where he can play and you only need to take care of feeding him at its hours and check that he has not got stuck or swallowed a big piece of newspaper??? I don't want to offend anybody with this comparison but if children can not be touched at all how they can learn about love and being confident with just 1.5 hrs a day available for this purpose???

A legislation on this may protect some children and save us some scary headlines in the newspapers but what is the price of that? are we loosing far more as a society? are we destined to raise insecure children not able to communicate their feelings? what sort of society are we building up?

That's the question... hate to get so philosophical but there's some food for thought...

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Well... I would expect that people at nurseries have been already checked to be safe to work with children... and I would be shocked to hear one of them saying something like "Oh I'm so sorry you have fell down, I will give you a hug as soon as there's somebody else in the room.."

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