What surname to give a baby in a two surname household?

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When I married dh I really thought hard about name changing. Our names don't sound good double barrelled and I didn't want to just be absorbed by his family name. We thought about combining our names to make a new one and that would have worked well but he sort of backed out, saying that when we had kids maybe they could use that name (It sounded v. plausible) but now we're expecting one - and with only 3 weeks to decide! -he's not keen on that either. How have others resolved the 2 name household issue - or how have you made the decision? should I just let the child take his for the sake of easy school registers etc.?

we recently adopted our neice and people still ask me why we didn't change her name to ours after she had been orphaned. It's like rebranding her for christsake! She is proud of who she is and who her parents were which is THE most important thing. Her name is a sense of identity and it makes me really pleased when she stands up and explains our relationship to the swimming teacher or person next to us on the bus.

goosey - what do you think in cases where it is clear that the relationship with the father is not permanent, do you still advocate that the child should have the father's name?

There was talk of me changing my name to my stepfather's, but I would have none of it. I don't think you can change your name, really. I've never felt like MrsX. My dad died when I was little, and I'd never lose his name. Not least because it's probably unique, in this country.
Also, as jimjams and others have said, academic publication make it tricky to change your name. My boss did it when she married 20 years ago, but it's really problematic trying to find her earliest papers, as you have to know her maiden name. She did some seminal work, but is rarely associated with it because she changed her name. Bad move, IMO.

Miracleabie, I think that's just lovely. How old is your neice?

Tinker -I think it depends on how much the relationship with the father meant to you at the time. I mean from the child's perspective it obviously meant enough for them to have been conceived and born. And often, although the relationship may not be permanent, there may be a mutual respect for each other's roles as parents. Just because two adults cannot live together doesn't mean the father is worthless.Of course there must be exceptions - I don't advocate using the fathers name in all cases - but I do think the child's best interest should come first.

well, dd has a different surname in France and in England!!! I added dh's surname to mine when we got married, as I didn't want his name on its own as it's rather unusual (as in 'easy to make jokes about it' unusual...), but still wanted to do the 'traditional thing'. He has kept his surname but keeps thinking he'd like to change it to mine. When he registered dd's birth in the UK, he gave her my surname only, which was lovely as she won't have to put up with the silly jokes! (but FIL not please about this... s*d him!). However, when we got her registered at the french consulate, they said she cannot have my surname alone, but has to have dh's, or dh's + mine. Therefore she has different surnames on her english and french passports... Might come in handy one day
But, it's a nuisance all having different surnames as no one ever gets it right. I should have stuck to my surname only for a start.

DS's surname is DP'sname-Myname. It is a bit of a mouthful, but it seemed the only thing to do, and it really works when either of us take him for appointments etc - it's obvious what the relationship is.We made sure that we gave him a simple one-syllable first name - and no middle names!
None of the women in my family have changed their names, and my SIL's sister has given her children her name, not her dh's.

DP's family insist on leaving out my name in DS's surname, and write to me as Mrs DP - even though we are not married.