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Original poster

d/d wasn't invited to girl in class party!?!

40 replies

lovingbarney · 05/10/2006 22:27

Don't get me wrong year 1 now and fair enough if not all class is invited but it seemed like all the girls were invited but mine. perhaps just an oversite i don't know a bit wierd. so i am kind of curious as to know why should i ask or is there more important things in life to be worrying about!?!

OP posts:
SoMuchToBats · 05/10/2006 22:33

Think it depends whether your dd is friendly and plays much with the birthday girl. My ds was a bit miffed that one of his friends in his class (whom he has known since paygroup) hasn't invited him to his party. But when I said to ds "Well, do you play with X much?" he said "not really". So I guess X is more likely to invite the people he really plays with a lot.

Twohoots · 05/10/2006 22:51

Ah lovingbarney I am dreading this when DD gets older (17 mths) - you just want to cuddle them and protect them when they are left out or upset by another kid (but it obv does happen at some stage - kids can be sooo mean). It's not nice to leave just one little one out though is it! Shame on his mother - I know you can't invite all and sundry - but one out of the whole class -pah!

It's a bit difficult to ask outright - do you know the Mum well enough to? Do something mega with DD on that day if she doesn't get an invite - as you say could be an oversight!

misdee · 05/10/2006 22:54

IMO, more important things to worry about

handlemecarefully · 05/10/2006 23:01

It depends - is your dd bothered?

Twohoots · 05/10/2006 23:12

I haven't been there yet and that's maybe why I came across as a bit of a 'wuss' about it all. It does matter if DD is bothered before the event obviously. But tbh, if all the girls are talking about it in class after the event she's bound to feel a little left out

handlemecarefully · 05/10/2006 23:14

I would certainly feel a bit bruised on my dd's behalf is she didn't get a party invite...

hana · 05/10/2006 23:19

but you can't invite everyone to a party!
have just given out invites for dd's 5 - girls only and there were 6 from her class that weren't invited - it's just life......
i certainly wouldn't ask why she wasn't invited, might come across as bit weird

handlemecarefully · 05/10/2006 23:23

that's a bit different hana to being the only girl in the class excluded from the party - as per lovingbarney's case. I doubt it would be such a problem if several girls hadn't received invites

Twohoots · 05/10/2006 23:29

I agree HMC, like I said earlier to leave out just one is awful. One more isn't going to hurt surely?? I know it's the old case of "just one more" but really, poor girl I really hope it was just an oversight.

handlemecarefully · 05/10/2006 23:30

Absolutely!

cat64 · 05/10/2006 23:32

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Twohoots · 05/10/2006 23:39

Good point cat! Let's hope it IS like that

helsi · 05/10/2006 23:41

I will not be inviting all the kids in dd class as I know she will not play with all 26 so I have asked her who she wants to come and gone with that.

jasper · 06/10/2006 00:26

Def more important things to worry about

Loshad · 06/10/2006 11:22

But sometimes one more is a real problem - eg we had a climbing wall party once - max 8 children, so he had 7 pals and that was that, My Ds2 was invited to a paintball party - they had invited 4 children - he couldn't go so they asked someone else in his place. It might be swimming , need certain numbers of adults to children, might be going somewhere in a car and no more spaces. IMO you really can't get upset about not getting an invite to a party, personally i think it's our job to make sure they know it's not something to get upset over, rather than stoking those feelings iyswim.

cat64 · 06/10/2006 12:36

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Message withdrawn

Original poster
lovingbarney · 06/10/2006 12:51

oh thanks for replies. at the end of the day how do you know who was invited. think it was only just the girls it is weird. I work part-time and am always rushing at beginning of week so i never get talking to anyone until thurs/fri. This all just came about by innocently chatting. d/d has been invited to party on sunday and their two hadn't been invited to this one. Then one of them said it looked like all the girls were at that other party. I'm loosing the will to live here with this dribble. but just wanted to reply to all the posts. anyway, we didn't do the big party last year and am definately doing it this year for all the class unless ofcourse boys are a real no go area by next year!?! on with the housework.

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Original poster
lovingbarney · 06/10/2006 12:54

sod the housework i am off the have cuppa and slice of my birthday cake from yesterday that my two d/d helped to bake and then they iced it yesterday!!! what a creation!!! you should have seen the kitchen

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handlemecarefully · 07/10/2006 00:21

I'm still with lovingbarney - think it's really very shitty to invite all the girls except one irrespective of the reasons....

Original poster
lovingbarney · 07/10/2006 07:47

hmc but do i know that was the case? You know i think i am going to ask her as a by the way. Waht do you think! " Was there any reason why d/d wasn't invited to bla bla party?" apparently myd/d said that girl whose party it ws said it was sent in the post to us !! we never got it. how much of that is true they are only 5 /6. Sort of bugging me now. well if that was the case she must think us rude for not replying.

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3andnomore · 07/10/2006 07:53

a few years back my es was the only one if all his friends that weren't invited to the party of one boy...fair enough, at that time him and that boy didn't get on, but my es had his Birthday a few weeks before that other boy and had invited him, and he did come with us ( we went to see Harry potter)...so, I was a bit miffed that he wasn't invited...especially as it was a double bad, because all his friends were, so, he had no one to play with! We were all living in one estate...!
Saying that, it is just life and not worth falling out over...

notasheep · 07/10/2006 07:57

dd is going to a party today and she is the only girl invited( so how must the rest of the class feel?!)
life goes on

Blandmum · 07/10/2006 07:57

on my dds request I once left out a girl from her party. But then the girl had throttled dd and several other children in the preceeding weeks.

Now it is all calmed down , they are friends and we have had sleep overs etc. But at the time dd was plain old scared of the child, and if she didn't want her at the party, I wasn't going to make her.

Realise that this isn't the case, but leaving out 'just one child' isn't always just done oout of spite. I did it 'cos dd was hysterical at the thought of this girl attending, and since it was dds birthday I let it go,

foxtrottingtotransylvania · 07/10/2006 08:06

It is a tricky situation but i think you need to look at it from the parents point of view - almost certainly will have a limited number, the party child may have been asked who to invite or specifically said who they didn't want, there will be friends from outside school, cousins etc. I would take the view, it's their party who they invite is their business. DS1, who started reception a couple of weeks ago, is going to his first party today and, although the mum told me she'd invited about 8 from the class, i don't know who, because i haven't asked around for fear of upsetting those who havn't been invited.

misdee · 07/10/2006 08:13

i have faced up to the fact long ago that my dd2 will rarely get invites due to her over excitability and violent rages. BUT she now has a friend, so there is a chance she will get an invite at some point.

dd1 doesnt get invited to every single party, and her own party i had limited numbers. so even those who i knew she wouldnt mind being there we couldnt invite.

and again, more in life to worry about.

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