Does anyone actually enjoy the newborn stage?

[LucyJones]

It's my second time round and I thought I'd cope better second time round. But 2 weeks in and I'm hating it just as much as the first time. I can't seem to see the light at the end of the tunnel - the constant feeding, winding, sleep deprivation, trying to settle etc. I think the newborn stage is like living my worst nightmare - so people hate interviews, flying etc, this is what I hate! Sorry to whinge but does any one else feel the same? Does anyone actually enjoy this bit?

and it was the only time my house was spotless!! save asking for help til they mobile then call in all the ironing favours and babysitting so you can shop - clothes shopping with baby = fun clothes shopping with 2 year old dont even go there !!!!!!!!!

ooh no - they're lovely when they're 4 - I'm thoroughly enjoying ds1 now he's 4. The tantrums and whinging have gone and he's, well, almost human..! Stuck in terrible 2's with ds2 though. BUT AT LEAST THEY BOTH SLEEP!!!

Haven't read the thread, but my response is: "Not a lot" [hugs] to you LucyJones.

Where do you live btw??

I just like not having to carry my 3yr old everywhere. Can't wait until DS (aka the Incredible Hulk) is better at walking, he weighs more than his big sister.

I enjoyed it this time round and because I hated it so much the last time and felt guilty about that, I hired a Doula to help me after the birth...so basically I cheated. Of course I now feel guilty about the fact that DS2 seems much more content and smiley, and wish I could turn back the clock for DS1! Can't win in my head.

Even this time I made a joke to the midwife about 'just having to get through this phase of settling new baby in to the world' and she looked shocked and said 'I enjoyed every phase of my children', so that was me put back in my place.

The way I look at it now is that I'm genuinely excited to have my next little person in the world and I'm really looking forward to when he is more aware of what is going on and he's more able to interact.

I really enjoyed ds as a tiny baby. It was just lovely to be snuggled up with him and watch him all day. With no pressure to be doing anything else (I've never been houseproud, tbh, and my sisters were sooooo helpful I didn't even change a nappy until he was two weeks old).

I had good friends from my NCT ante-natal classes and Sure Start baby groups - baby massage and all that stuff - which helped because I was never lonely. I could just devote myself to this fascinating little person.

The lack of sleep was a killer but I took the advice to sleep whenever the baby did (we were often dozing* together snuggled up in my reclining chair after a feed when dh came home - I used to half wake up and realise he was stood there admiring us). I imagine it is 10 times harder with an older child to look after.

• I know sleeping on a sofa isn't advised due to cot death but I decided a reclining chair was OK because I couldn't actually move anywhere and squash him.

Mind you, breastfeeding was awful at first - got cracked nipples, mastitis, the works. Toes curled at every feed. Lucky enough to have supportive b/f counsellor/HV/dh.

DS1 was a nightmare newborn. He cried non stop, except for when he was feeding, and never slept. He woke up 6+ times a night for 9 months, and it was horrendous. By then, I was literally ready to lie down and die because I was so exhausted.

DS2 is brill (well so far anyway, we are only 4 weeks in) He sleeps like a dream, he is very settled during the day, leaving me some quality time with DS1, and, apart from a few difficulties in the first fortnight with feeding, it's been better than I ever could of imagined.

TBH, I have found DS1's whole 21 months a trial, as he has always been so strong willed, and while I was pg wioth DS2, it was dreadful. However, as demanding as it is, I definitely find him more fun now than before, even if I do want to throw myself out of the window several times a day.

I have to say, I'm not one for teeny babies, and I will be glad when DS2 is a bit older. Esecially as I know I am not going to have another, and that's it with me and newborns.

Probably

hated it hated it hated it

Sorry did I say how much I hated it

I did feel a lot better about it at around 8 weeks but at the time 8 weeks seemed like an eternity.

Haven't read the whole thread but no I really did not enjoy it. But am looking forward to going to see my friend's new born this weekend for a cuddle, complete with ear plugs to ensure I need my much needed sleep.

Hated it with DS - he was born in the middle of winter and I felt I was living an eternal night time .... I had PND and was a bit of a basket case I have to say .... he cried ALL the time, was NEVER happy ... it was grim grim grim ...

I loved it with DD though ... she never cried and acted as though she had read the manual before she was born. I didn't even mind night time wakings as I was used to no sleep (DS was still a crap sleeper at 4) and middle of the night feeds were our quiet time together, just her and me ...

The novelty wore off when she was around 8 weeks though ... still didn't mind the feeds but I found her so boring .... until she was sitting up and grabbing for stuff on her own .... at about 5 months.

Now she is a shocker of a 2 year old I do wish we could go back to those early easy days.

If I could guarantee another newborn like her and not like DS I might think of having another - but it is too much of a gamble.

LJ! Congrats! I didn't notice you'd popped - I thought you were more than a month later than me??!!

SOrry you are struggling. I love having a newborn (although I don't think she is that anymore )although I must admit having ds as well took the shine off a bit - no just gazing into dd's eyes (can't gaze with someone screaming 'train please!' ' bikkit please')

Hope you feel better soon xx

I loved it third time round. First time I was freaked out by the whole thing - couldn't even control a pushchair in town . Second time the baby was fine but struggled with a baby combined with DS#1. Third time round I'd learnt that you don't need to get it 100% correct and that babies aren't made of bone china. Really enjoyed it.

However I do remember that first time round I vowed that I'd go through labour again anytime in preference to the first few weeks.

Where you LJ?? How are you doing honey? [hugs]

It is the lack of sleep, Amnesty International would be on your case in any other scenario.

Constant feeding all day, then the cluster feeding alllllllllllllllllllllllllll evening, then a small nap and then just as you get into a really deep sleep - BAM!, you are hit over the head with a hammer and are feeding again.

Far worse with dd2, I spent probably 3 months waffting about weeping with dh peering at me from doorways wondering when his wife would be back and who this tiresome woman was.

And I agree with MI, the next person that said to me "enjoy it while it lasts!" would have got a left hook, enjoy what you muppet???????????

Just to update - feeling quite a lot better today. We've decided to top uo each night with formula so dh does that while I get a bit more sleep. Dd has days when she feeds all the time but when she is more settled I feel almost human Thanks for all the support

Newborns are cute but pretty boring.

I loved 1-2 just as they are beginning to walk and discover new things, DD1 is 2.3 and an absolute riot (most days) her dancing and singing always brings a smile to my face. DD2 is just beginning to get to the interesting stage.

Oh god the lack of sleep and constant crying, thats all I remember. Hard bloody work and you get nothing back when they are soo tiny

DS has just hit two and am really enjoying him now, havent experienced too many tantrum either though he is still a very bad eater.

Dont miss the newborn stage at all, and not convinced I would want to do it again. Feel fulfilled by ds and throughly enjoying quality time with him much to the disapointment of broody dh

Hang on in there Lucy, it def gets better and better

Glad you are feeling a bit better LJ. Just keep positive and keep telling yourself: "It won't last forever". My two have a 14 month age gap and they are now 2.7 and 17 months and A LOT easier to cope with than when DD2 was a wee babe (she was prem and was a "difficult" baby to handle, iykwim??) It keeps getting better and better - not that I don't have days when I would just LOVE to sell them to the Battersea Dog's Home!!

Lucy, I feel for you.. the first 6 months of both my dds were absolute hell on earth.. I am not a natural baby person I don't think and mine basically screamed all day and all night for months.. my dd2 was 14 months before she slept for 6 hours a night
after both i swore i would never ever put myself through that again.. and I have just found out I'm preggers with no 3 and i'm chuffed to bits. I know it will be dreadful for the 1st year, but i also know that then it gets wonderful and you have this fabulous little human being rather than squalling infant... I feel sorry for those who love the baby stage but hate the childhood bit- at least mine is over after a year!!!!!!!!!i promise that lots of people feel like us.. just look at this thread.. and I promise that one day you will see it all as a distant hazy memory...and then you'll probably get up the duff again ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

ps- captain dippy- battersea dogs' home won't take 'em.. I tried

PMSL

I'm expecting No 3 too - so it must be ok in the end!!!!!!!!?????????