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Original poster

Tell me to just accept hes a knob and to stop being worried about him please.

39 replies

TambaIsInTheClique · 18/08/2006 11:46

Cause as usual I am making excuses for him and not accepting the fact that hes probably just a knob who I should forget all about.

I was supposed to see him tuesday night and when we spoke on Monday evening he was driving down the M5 motorway and when we chatted he was very normal, laughing and joking and gave me no sign that he didnt want to be talking with me (He had called me) Hes the type of person that says what hes thinking (embarrassingly so at times!) He was on route to Cardiff and due back into Birmingham at 6.15am Tuesday morning.

So I didnt call him to confirm anything Tuesday as I knew he would be sleeping (He drives long distance) But I did call Tuesday evening and got no answer, the phone just rings out and he doesnt have an answer phone. He didnt show up and I was pretty pissed off about it but didnt text him to say so as I thought that would be childish - I decided to wait til he called.

I tried him Wednesday evening and Thursday evening - no answer.

He has stood me up before but called to apoligise and give an excuse. He hasnt ignored me calling before.

What I should do is accept that he doesnt want to be friends anymore and put it down to my bad judgment and leave it, but part of me is worried he was in a car accident or something. (I know im making excuses) Also, before he buggers off never to be seen again I need to pick stuff of mine up from his house, where I have stayed over a few times. Im not his girlfriend btw, Just a friend.

I find it hard to believe he would act like such a prick for the following reasons:

In France when I had never met him before and had no money and no way off getting home he took care of me for three days. He was really good to me and seemed like a really good guy.

He calls or texts religiously every day even when hes abroad

He always makes sure that when im out I stay over at his as its near to the pub and then brings me home in the morning (its an hours drive)

Someone has suggested to me that he has met someone and doesnt want the hassel of explaining who I am etc

So, am I being stupid for worrying and should I just delete his number from my phone?

OP posts:
EvesMama · 18/08/2006 11:58

i would try and leave him out of your plans for a while, if he rings to meet up, tell him NO as your sick of being left waiting for him like a fool and he doesnt even have the decency to let you know hes not bothering.tell him when he grows up and is capable of adult FRIENDSHIPS then you give him the time of day but otherwise..bog off and mess someone elses plans up..leve the stuff at his, toothbrushes even clothes, its not worth arranging to get them as he prob wont be in..you deserve better and he doesnt deserve you..good luck honey.x

twinsetandpearls · 18/08/2006 12:00

He is a knob stop worrying about him.

dmo · 18/08/2006 12:14

poor you
i would take evesmamas advice and make plans that dont invoulve him for a while
hopefully he will ring soon

VeniVidiVickiQV · 18/08/2006 12:18

Well, you need to get your stuff back. Once thats done, then just leave him to contact you in future. If he suggests meeting in future, tell him it would be great but take it with a pinch of salt.

Think you just need to back off slowly. You arent getting anything out of this are you?

Original poster
TambaIsInTheClique · 18/08/2006 12:20

Okay - hes a knob

Just looked at another site he uses and he is online on there - although not on MSN so obviously blocked me.

Wanker.

Dont know why its upset me actually, other than I thought we were friends and I dont know what ive done to make him be a prick.

OP posts:
theflumpsmum · 18/08/2006 12:20

i would do as evesmama said and just get on with things,if he does happen to call i would just say 'no worries ive been really busy anyway' lol.dont let him think you've been worried about him or waiting for him to call.as for bits that are at his if theyre not vitally importanat or needed i wouldnt bother about them.if you go to the same pub as him ,you're sure to run into him sometime.
but to answer your original question..any man that has been in contact with you on a daily basis for a while then suddenly stops is a knob (unless he has a really good reason).dont let him bother you,hes not worth it.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 18/08/2006 12:21

Oh tamba probably not. Im quite often on here but havent switched msn on.

Stop worrying about him. I think you are focusing your attentions in the wrong place. Leave him to it. Just send him an email saying next time he's in the area can he drop your stuff of please etc.

Carmenere · 18/08/2006 12:24

Tamba, is there a possibility that he was hoping for more from your friendship, has realised that he won't be getting any and has lost interest?

Original poster
TambaIsInTheClique · 18/08/2006 12:40

Maybe, I dont know. I shouldnt give it a second thought really, but its crap feeling let down. Also, If he is just a knob, the I have a whole lot of 'I told you so'' that will be coming my way shortly.

OP posts:
EvesMama · 18/08/2006 13:02

i would tell him your not taking his childish behaviour anymore..let him know its not acceptable and thats the reason you are not going to be making time for him, if you dont let him know, youll be doing what you dont like about him..keeping him guessing..he needs to know youre not standing for his crap..kick him to the kerb guurrrllfriend!..flicking clicky wrist thing

EvesMama · 18/08/2006 13:03

no it wont, we may have opinions but we dont have cristal balls do we?..just cos someone may have said it would end this way..was a 50/50 cahnce wasnt it!
dont let it get you down

FioFio · 18/08/2006 13:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Beetroot · 18/08/2006 13:05

I go with Evesmama..

Btw how old is he?

Original poster
TambaIsInTheClique · 18/08/2006 13:05

Why Fio? I think you mean cause ive recently split with H but incase you dont, jus thought id check

OP posts:
Original poster
TambaIsInTheClique · 18/08/2006 13:05

Hes 34

OP posts:
FioFio · 18/08/2006 13:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
TambaIsInTheClique · 18/08/2006 13:10

I wasnt sleeping with him though. Hes not my type. But I think that being on my own and because its only been a couple of months I am still finding being alone in the evenings really difficult, so getting out the house once a week and having fun and actually feeling 23 instead of 63 was great. I looked forward to it.

OP posts:
proudofmyboobs · 18/08/2006 13:12

Me too (but what would I know )

Is there any possibility that you might have wanted things to go a bit further Tamba? What's the situation with your H now? Is he still moved out? If so then you can't be blamed for wanting a bit of male company, even just for a chat. Personally I would leave him for now and wait until he gets in touch with you. What kind of things belonging to you are at his house and is there any way you can do without them?

proudofmyboobs · 18/08/2006 13:13

OK have just read below post...Ignore everything I said

Original poster
TambaIsInTheClique · 18/08/2006 13:16

No, I didnt want things to go any further, he has alot of good points (hes funny, generous and sweet) but some bad ones too (like being unreliable, I disagree majorily with alot of his opinions and I dont find him psyically attractive) I am holding out for Mr Perfect

There some clothes of mine, bath stuff, a book im half way through, stuff thats not really important.

OP posts:
TambaTheDragonSlayer · 18/08/2006 19:44

Well I just got a text from him

He says hes in Germany.

Is he fuck.

Cause hes been online and unless they have installed broadband in the cab of a truck....

I relpied with a nice and simple "I dont like you anymore, Find yourself someone elses time to waste"

Job Done i think.

Carmenere · 18/08/2006 19:48

Well I think you probably did right to sever ties with him but tbh I think there is a possibiliy that he did want more and thought that you were taking the piss abit letting him drive you an hour out of his way and staying in his house ect. Best off chalked down to experience.

misdee · 18/08/2006 19:53

errr n o, but there such thing as mobile internet.

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 18/08/2006 19:58

I know Misdee. But the way his phone is set up, when you call it it will tell you if he is in another country. The normal ring ring goes duuuuuuuur durrrrrrrrrr and it tells you the rates for the call.

Even if he was / is in Germany, he has no excuse for standing me up twice in a row and not calling to apolgise or explain.

Carmenere · 18/08/2006 20:04

But he does have an excuse Tamba, he's a nob and he is not committed to you. He would probably do the same to a bloke and a bloke would probably be mildly irritated and get over it. You are being a bit stalkerish considering you are not in a relationship with him, sorry if I am being too frank.

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