Tell me to just accept hes a knob and to stop being worried about him please.

[TambaIsInTheClique]

Cause as usual I am making excuses for him and not accepting the fact that hes probably just a knob who I should forget all about.

I was supposed to see him tuesday night and when we spoke on Monday evening he was driving down the M5 motorway and when we chatted he was very normal, laughing and joking and gave me no sign that he didnt want to be talking with me (He had called me) Hes the type of person that says what hes thinking (embarrassingly so at times!) He was on route to Cardiff and due back into Birmingham at 6.15am Tuesday morning.

So I didnt call him to confirm anything Tuesday as I knew he would be sleeping (He drives long distance) But I did call Tuesday evening and got no answer, the phone just rings out and he doesnt have an answer phone. He didnt show up and I was pretty pissed off about it but didnt text him to say so as I thought that would be childish - I decided to wait til he called.

I tried him Wednesday evening and Thursday evening - no answer.

He has stood me up before but called to apoligise and give an excuse. He hasnt ignored me calling before.

What I should do is accept that he doesnt want to be friends anymore and put it down to my bad judgment and leave it, but part of me is worried he was in a car accident or something. (I know im making excuses) Also, before he buggers off never to be seen again I need to pick stuff of mine up from his house, where I have stayed over a few times. Im not his girlfriend btw, Just a friend.

I find it hard to believe he would act like such a prick for the following reasons:

In France when I had never met him before and had no money and no way off getting home he took care of me for three days. He was really good to me and seemed like a really good guy.

He calls or texts religiously every day even when hes abroad

He always makes sure that when im out I stay over at his as its near to the pub and then brings me home in the morning (its an hours drive)

Someone has suggested to me that he has met someone and doesnt want the hassel of explaining who I am etc

So, am I being stupid for worrying and should I just delete his number from my phone?

LOL @ stalkerish.

I just wanted my stuff back really. Its not much but its mine iyswim.

Im happier now i know he didnt crash his truck or something too.

Hes just texted to say hes going to call when he gets off the ferry at 2. It sounds like he really doesnt know that it drives me mad and is upset that ive told him that I dont think we should spend time together. I will never understand men.

I need to find some girly friends I think, dont know where from though!

sounds like you will forgive him to me

Er OI.

tamba, havent you ever seen the film When Harry Met Sally????

What you Oi -ing at V?

Nope never seen When Harry Met Sally - whats it about?

you are kidding arent you!

it is about MEN AND WOMEN CAN NEVER BE JUST FRIENDS!!!

I know lots of people that go online & use things like messenger on a mobile. Blooming expensive from abroad though (I looked into it last year when I went on hol as I was applying for lots of jobs & wanted to check the replies).

i'm with carmenere on this one. he fancied you, made a huge effort like having you over, driving for miles etc. and when it became clear to him that he wasn't going to get anywhere he lowered you a couple of notches on his priority list. so he'd make arrangements with you, but if something better came along, he'd go with that.

i'd get my stuff back and then let it lie. bummer really, cos sounds like you really liked him, but you want different things. time to move on.

Blondie, its cheaper if you take a laptop and sign up to WLAN connections. or use an internet cafe, of course.

I currently have free mobile internet via 3G data card from my work, due to the project I am working on...it is completely fab and I will be desolated to lose it, but the sub is around 60 euros a month, which I cant really justify so that I can log into MN while waiting for a train.

Well we had arranged to meet last night so I could get stuff back etc - although I didnt tell him this was why incase he got all arsey with me.

He was due here at 7pm. At 7.45 he text to say he couldnt face me??? So I called him and asked what he was going on about but he didnt explain and I said I would wait half an hour for him and then would delete his number out of my phone and not make an effort to be friends with him anymore.

He turned up and we went out. I explained to him how irritating I found it when he messed me about and that I wasnt going to put myself out for him anymore and although I appreciated him taking me out and that I enjoyed his company it wasnt worth being stood up getting grumpy for.

He said he was sorry and that he didnt know why he had found it so difficult to be around me lately and that he too enjoyed my company and didnt like the thought of us not being friends anymore. I asked him if was because he fancied me and was getting nowhere and he laughed and said of course not, that he knew I was unavailable and that it was fine.

I bought all my stuff back with me this morning and wont be calling him, if he calls me then fine but I wont be putting myself out for him or looking forward to any plans we make together as he is too unreliable.

I did have a really good time last night though.

It sounds to me like you're relying on him too juch and maybe treating him like a boyfriend? - 'He calls or texts religiously every day even when hes abroad ' - even my dh wouldn't do that

good for you tamba you showed him who was boss and you got your stuff back. The ball is in his court now and if he does like you he will call, if he doesnt move on.

I think part of the relying on him to much stems from when I first met him - I had no choice put to basically trust him with my life! I was stuck at Dover with no money and my phone had seemed to stop working. 4 hours away from home. So we went to France. Hes a truck driver and spent 3 days with him in his truck. I had gone with a group of people I knew and some I had never met before (He was one of them) but we had got seperated and ended up with it just being us! All I had was my passport, clean knickers and a book! (Had a fantastic time mind you)

And also partly, I think because I only recently split with H (3 months ago) being able to go out and have some time away every week has been my life line iykwim.

So you are probably right in that I rely on him to much. I think he relys on me alot too though. His little lad lives alone way from him and he lives alone so I think he has enjoyed having someone to phone who will ask how his day has been and tell him to drive carefully.

tamba, where in the country are you??
you could try anda arrange a meet up. im sure youd get lots of replys!