What age is middle aged? Or is it a state of mind rather than an age? And are you middle aged or not?

[WideWebWitch]

I was wondering this as I was in the hairdresser this morning. I'm sure I must be middle aged, being 39 and all but I don't feel it. I know some of my attitudes are and some aren't but what do you reckon mumsnetters? Is it an age and if so, what age or is it attitude and behaviour?

I have known people of 40, 50, and nearing 60 who are so young in themselves that you dont think of them as being middle-aged at all.

eh What Bl**dy sex drive?

Well you wouldn't find me in Top Shop or River Island, so I suppose middle age is upon me (although similarly you wouldn't find me sporting Jaeger's finest either!)

If middle aged people don't have sex Kama, then I am definitely middle aged

I am 42,prob will b dead by 84,so yes i feel middle aged

MI, wow, that's very nice! Can I share too? At a work do on Thursday a woman said 'you're 39? Oh, I thought you were about my age' - she's 31 !!! but she may have been buttering me up, she works for me.

I have my head firmly in the sand on this one. Of course I am not almost 38, I am 21, and the three children that seem to follow me around a lot are just sweet misguided souls who think I am responsible enough to look after them 24/7. I did have one moment of painful clarity this year when I realised I was closer in age to my clearly-an-adult au pair's parents than I was to her. But I have swept that revelation under my funky Ikea rug, smeared some vaseline on my mirror and carried on regardless.

MI and WWW - I think I need to hang around with your aquaintances for a bit! When I tell people I have three children, I always wait for them to step back, gasping in amazement that surely I am too young for that. They never do.

Funny people's perceptions of themselves, Blu for example, your posts may be intelligent and wise but sensible is not the word I would choose to describe them as, more like coming at things from a refreshing and unique angle (ie. like a young and creative person)

www, you'll always be a blonde bombshell and mi you mean you haven't just finished uni?

bog off motherinferior

this is an intelligent discursive thread, not an excuse for you to show off about your hairdo

I clasp my purse in a concerned middle-aged way that I recognise from my granny when out shopping

but then I did it when I was 21...

Before I had kids I was always mistaken for younger than my years. Now at 43 (last week )and three children later, people are NEVER surprised when they find out my age. Anyone else found this?

Also it's sad to realise that although I'm still slim, there will be certain clothes that just don't look good in the coming years as they show wrinkly knees, wobbly arms, crepey neckline. Things you can'y do anyhting about.

Some people are born middle aged... haven't you all met that Saffy type child/teenager?

Had some friends for dinner not too long ago - people we've known for nearly 20 years...
We ended up looking at some old photos from about 15 years ago.... and the comments went along the lines of..
"OOh look how much hair you had Z!"
" Gosh, weren't you slim then, X.."
" Erm - can't see me wearing those sorts of trousers any more.."
etc

until we got to a photo of me & DH and my best friend slammed down the album in a fit of mock anger and said
"Damn you, Legacy, you haven't changed a bit..."

Tee Hee

Tra la la

How nice Legacy! Thanks for your kind comments Cam! And ha ha at Wilbur, yes, absolutely I used to expect people to say 'but you're not old enough to have been married twice, divorced once and have 2 small children!!" but nope, they never do! I like this thread. It has made me decide that maybe I'm not middle aged after all.

god legacy you should really update your image

I mean if you haven't changed it in fifteen years

Mog - that has happened to me too. I was always mistaken for being about 5-10 years younger than my real age . Nobody bats an eye lid now. My skin has really aged in the last couple of years.

And I'm very nearly 43 as well.

I've thought about the Susie (BB) tea thing too as I'm also 43. What is more important than a decent cup of tea, after all? Can a decent human being function in the morning before a decent COT made by their beloved? If that is a sign of middle age then I have been middle aged for at least 20 years!!

People assume that the small children I have with me (as a childminder) are my own - I don't dare enlighten them and tell them that I am the mother of a 22 year old (and a couple of others). Then they would know that I really am old.