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Original poster

Are you strict about bedtimes?

87 replies

Bomper · 04/07/2006 22:46

I have always been on the 'Yes' side of the arguement, mainly because if my children don't get a good nights sleep they are good for nothing the next day and also, let's face it, as much as I love the little buggars, it's nice to have a few hours 'adult' time with just me and dh, to have a glass of wine, watch a dvd etc. However, it seems to me that I am in the minority, I have just seen my neighbours three year old out in her front garden with her mum, whilst my eight year old has been in bed since 8 o'clock!!! Just wondered what the mumsnet mums (and dads) thought!!

OP posts:
EmmyLou · 05/07/2006 11:59

I have to do them one at a time as dh is not usually home. I think they like knowing the routine.

dd3 (2.10yrs) & dd2 (7 yrs) bath and out by 7.15pm
dd3 stories etc till 7.30/45
dd2 reading to me/me reading to her etc bed at 8.15/30
dd1 (nearly 11)showers herself and bed at 9pm school night, 9.30 weekend.

Am dreading the onset of secondary school homework and me not being able to supervise/help as busy with younger ones.

JessaJam · 05/07/2006 12:07

Yes I am relatively firm about bed time being the same time everynight. BUT it is a late bed time(so everyone else on here will tut and shake their heads at me!) DS is 10mo and goes to bed at about 10-10.15pm. He usually goes to sleep straight away and sleeps for 11-12 hours through. So late getting up too

And yes, there are times when I would like him to go to bed earlier so I can have a bit more time...but DH has him in the mornings while I work and he often works very late so would fall apart if forced to wake up at 7am after only getting to bed at 3am...Plus I don't get home until 6pm or later due to commute, so it is nice to have time to spend with ds.

and YES I know he will need to go to bed earlier in order to get up earlier one day...

madmarchhare · 05/07/2006 12:10

Ooo, bedtime is definately my thing. Ive always been tough on this one. Having seen friends kids run rings round them with all this 'just another glass of water' crap made me very determined to get this one of to a tee.

It may be a bit later than some at 8.30 but we dont need to get up early.

BadHair · 05/07/2006 12:11

Yes - 7.30-8pm on schooldays, 8-8.30 on Saturday. They don't really notice the extra half hour but it gives them extra time to tidy up!

More flexible if on holiday but no later than 9pm.

I usually work after they're in bed, so the sooner they're tucked up in the land of nod, the sooner I get my stuff done.

KBear · 05/07/2006 12:13

Jessajam - no tutting from me! Sounds like your arrangement suits you so that's fine. It will change as your child gets older but you know that!

Someone asked if children are grumpy in the day with later bedtimes - my answer is yes, sometimes but I counterbalance the later bedtimes with 6pm bedtimes when the need arises and on the cooler evenings so they are usually fine.

JessaJam · 05/07/2006 12:14

Kbear

m1m1rie · 05/07/2006 12:17

EmmyLou, are you my alter-ego (albeit with one extra child)?
Bedtimes are non-negotiable. DD1 (11.5), 9pm week nights, 9.30 (ish) Fri & Sat.
DD2 absolutely has to be tucked up by 7.30 (or slightly earlier if I can manage it). DH not always there by bedtime, but I'm blowed if I'm going to let the little monster stay up until he comes in (what if he doesn't get home 'til 9??!!! (shudder) She's a raving lunatic by 5.30pm, and I love that whole bedtime routine thing, it keeps me sane (dinner 5.30-6pm, half an hour to go back into the garden, bath at 6.45, 10 mins of Playhouse Disney whilst we put on jammies, kiss goodnight and off for a story and warm milk in her bedroom just after 7) Just going through it makes me full of anticipation of the peace that ensues.

drpepper · 05/07/2006 12:17

my dd (3) has only just got into a bedtime routine she used to be a nightmare sleeper but now she is in bed between 6 and 7 and stays there until between 6 and 7 in the morning ! i plan to stick to this as it seems to be working well and she isnt being such a grumpy bum at bedtimes or through the day

april74 · 05/07/2006 12:19

on school nights ds is in bed by 8.00pm although he often lays awake for hours trying to get to sleep in this head.

Weekend is different he normally goes to bed at 8 and can watch a video, I am luckly with ds, he usually sleeps for 11 hours no matter what time he goes to bed, and I do like my weekend lay ins as well.

m1m1rie · 05/07/2006 12:22

By the way, secondary school homework is a pain in the backside and a blight on the precious little time I have to myself. Why does she always say that the teacher didn't explain it to them One night I sat up until 10pm trying to work out her maths homework that had no explanation, just a worksheet with a sample question on it. 5 classmates parents sent in notes saying they didn't get it.Her maths SATs results were apalling and I'm feeling very let down by the teacher, as maths used to be her strong subject.. Sorry for the hijack!!! Needed to rant

hotmama · 05/07/2006 12:23

Yes! Dd1 (21 months) goes to bed about between 6.30 and 7.30 and sleeps through until 7ish the next morning - has been like this for about 18 months - and she never moans as it is the routine she knows - and she is def ready to go by then.

Dd2 (21 weeks) goes to bed after dd1 (at the moment) she then gets fed and put to bed somewhere between 7.30 and 9pm - will probably changes as they get older - especially when dd1 realises that dd2 goes to bed after her!

I need to chill out and have some me time with dp before another day as "Mummy'.

MeAndMyBoy · 05/07/2006 12:26

Yes DS is 3 and is in bed by 7 - 7.30 the neighbours kids are usually still up at 10.30 when I'm going to bed.

m1m1rie · 05/07/2006 12:28

MAMB, I hate that. We used to have Lord Of The Flies neighbours who would go out for the evening and leave their Kids (about 6 of them) alone. It could go on way past midnight. Can anyone tell the heat is getting to me?...

QueenEagle · 05/07/2006 12:29

ds3 and ds4 (3.5 and 18mths) are in bed usually by 7.30 and certainly no later than 8pm every night. I would be driven insane if they were up any longer. I relish my evenings without the constant whining and neediness of toddlers!

On the other hand I am now really starting to enjoy my evening conversations with ds1 and dd who are 12.5 and 14.5 - very entertaining! They go at 9pm and 10pm. ds2 who is 10.5 goes at 8pm and reads til 8.30.

I am constantly amazed at the toddlers who are still running around in the street at 9pm every night in my street.

suzywong · 05/07/2006 12:31

Yes
I am
bath at 6.30-6.40
books and cuddles
in bed and lights out at 7.30.
May go a max of 15 minutes either way.
The Fragrant Wong Brothers are 5 and 2.10

FloatingOnTheMed · 05/07/2006 12:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

suzywong · 05/07/2006 12:37

That little girl who was snatched in the West Country last year was up at 10.30pm

nailpolish · 05/07/2006 12:37

much the same as suzy here

bath after teatime, usually around 640pm
stories cuddles and warm milk
lights out 730pm

i find children are happier if they have a routine, as are mums and dads

dd's are 3.9 and 1.9

OF COURSE there are always exceptions, like parties in the house, but they are rare treats and not on a school night

trefusis · 05/07/2006 12:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

alligator · 05/07/2006 12:40

whats the problem with young kids staying up late if the dont have school/nursery etc the next day and their parents are quite happy with it? Can see that its a problem at all!!!!!

Dd goes to bed at 9 mostly and sleeps through till 8.30/9. If she wakes earlier than she quite often goes for a nap in the afternoon too (actually sometimes she has a nap even when she wakes at 9). I like to have time with her in the evenings cos I dont see her all day and so we go and play while dp has a bath and watches Eastenders or whatever. Then dp and I chill together after 9.

Different strokes for differnet folks.

nailpolish · 05/07/2006 12:40

our neighbours across the street let their children stay up til about 11pm on a friday and saturday night, they range in ages from 12yrs to 14 mths

walk past their house on a saturday or sunday morning around 11 or 12 and they are all still asleep

tbqh i think the parents love a massive lie in at the weekends that why they let them stay up so late

for me id rather have evenings than mornings for adult time

clumsymum · 05/07/2006 12:42

before ds started school I would have loved it if ds would have slept later in the morning. But he always woke early, even tho I tried putting his bedtime back for a while to try to shift him down the clock.

I suppose it does become a culture shock when they start school tho'

Papillon · 05/07/2006 12:44

I love flexibility and being outdoors in the summer. Sometimes I don´t come home till round 7pm. dd (almost 3 years) goes round 9am. And ds (7 months) 7.30pm sometimes or 8.30 if has a later sleep.

ScoobyDooooo · 05/07/2006 12:45

Ds goes to bed between 7-7.30pm sometimes a bit later at the weekend, he needs routine in his life & i need a nreak in the evening.

dd is only 5 months but she goes between 8-8.30pm so then i have from 8.30pm with dp & time for myself.

I really believe in bed time routine & stick to it as good as i can.

FloatingOnTheMed · 05/07/2006 12:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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