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Original poster

Has anyone else's dh/dp had the 'snip'? Advice needed please!

27 replies

Namechangedincaseimspotted · 13/06/2006 21:19

Am pg with my third baby and dont want anymore after this. Dh has agreed that this will be the last due to personal reasons.

Just looking for some advice from anyone who has gone through with thier dh/dp having the snip.

Thanks!

OP posts:
mousie · 13/06/2006 21:24

will watch thread with interest - my dh has agree to have it done when he is forty - two years to go and I am on the mini pill til then...

psychomum5 · 13/06/2006 21:26

Mine DH hed the deed done on him after baby no.5

he had his done at our doctors surgery (they have a minor op room) with local anaesthetic. he wouldn't do it again (he did say that if it didn't work he wouldn't ever cotemplate it againGrin), but he didn't take long to heal.....three days in bed and then went back to work. he is a builder too so tis not like he had an easy job to go back and relax in!
he was recommended to get some of the special jockpants from the sports shop as they would give lots of much needed support down thereWink, and otherwise all went well:)

and it worked too thankfully so he didn't need to worry about having to go back:)!

the worse thing for him in fact was having to provide the samples after to make sure if it had worked....LOLGrin

Blackduck · 13/06/2006 21:27

watching with interest too - dp has agreed to this (thou' I'd like number two first..)

psychomum5 · 13/06/2006 21:27

ooh....and the one thing we both worried about before was whether it made any difference to sex.........it doesn'tGrinWink!!!!!

Blackduck · 13/06/2006 21:28

have heard from a colleague that a bag of frozen peas are essential Grin

psychomum5 · 13/06/2006 21:31

ah yes...forgot that...they areWink

oh....and much sympathy too as 'you never have to go thro this so you possibly cannot comprehend how I feel'....

I retorted......'I gave birth to five babies that was much like squeezing melons thro very small holes'

shut him up just fineGrin

Original poster
Namechangedincaseimspotted · 13/06/2006 21:31

Thats interesting to know. I'm 29 and he is 33 so have been told by some friends (and know-it-alls!) that they will refuse as we are too young. But our reasons are very real and reasonable.
And if he chickens out, it means i have to go and get sterilised so eager to get him done!

His main concern is the sex and will he still come? Otherwise he will feel like a fake.

OP posts:
Original poster
Namechangedincaseimspotted · 13/06/2006 21:32

Mental note to self: Stock up on bags of peas!!! Grin

OP posts:
psychomum5 · 13/06/2006 21:33

reassure him that my DH was scared of that too.
he does still 'come' and it feels all the same as before. to me and himWink.

no 'fakeness' felt:)

Blackduck · 13/06/2006 21:34

don't know for sure, but think you go for conselling - and from my extensive survey (couple of guys at work) if you are over 30 and have kids its pretty much a done deal...

psychomum5 · 13/06/2006 21:35

oh, and I was 29...he was 32. doctors really weren't bothered about age, just whether we were sure we really had completed our family. Photo was then produced of all our five, permission grantedGrin

Blackduck · 13/06/2006 21:36

yeah - but you had FIVE!!!

psychomum5 · 13/06/2006 21:39

hmmmm.....maybe we did have enough reason thenBlush.

friend of ours who only had one child and were sure they only ever wanted the one did have to have more councelling but they still did him and he was at the same doctors as us.

sunnydelight · 13/06/2006 21:44

DH and I agreed he would have the snip after DS2 but we never got round to it so ... a couple of weeks after DD was born he made that appointment. He went private as it was only about £250 and for that he could choose when to have it done rather than hanging around on waiting lists. I made it very clear that one happy accident per family was enough so it was in his interest to get it sorted asap. He said it was more uncomfortable than he anticipated, but in all honesty he couldn't say it was painful. A couple of hours in the clinic and I think he took a couple of days off work to recuperate. He was a bit tender and swollen for a couple of weeks but nothing major. In all honesty I have to say that it has been fantastic for our sex life as the worry thing has gone - quote me if your DH needs persuading Grin

Original poster
Namechangedincaseimspotted · 13/06/2006 21:45

Mines due to having one healthy happy pg, then one awful late miscarriage and now one very stressful, emotionally draining and physically demanding pg. Just can't go though the stress again. And we have said we have one happy boy, another due soon and i'm not out to collect a set (boys and girls). Blessed with what we have and thankful this pg has got this far (fingers crossed it all goes well!)
So i have no desire for more and i think my reasons are justified. And if in the future dh wants more (which he says no way) he can find someone else. I as the woman know my body and my limits and have reached them.

Does that make sense??

OP posts:
Original poster
Namechangedincaseimspotted · 13/06/2006 21:47

Thanks. I'm feeling more positive that he will go through with it. Will show him these posts as a bit of knowledge for him. Not the same when you read from a clinical website!

OP posts:
northstar · 13/06/2006 21:49

Im reading this out to dp right now trying to convince him - could a few more people post some encouraging stories PLEEEEEEASE.

sparkler1 · 13/06/2006 21:49

My DH has always said he would get the snip done once our family was complete. We chose to have two children and that is what we have now. DH went for a consultation at our GP surgery just after dd2 was born and it was suggested that he went away to think about it and contact the GP when he had made up his mind. Four years later he still hasn't done anything about it - I think the GP scared him away. Grin I was just PMSL behind the curtain whilst the GP had DH laying on a couch with his trousers off explaining what the procedure would entail. Grin
He's gonna have to go and sort it out soon - I came off the pill just before christmas, after being on it for 17 years, and things are getting a bit close IYKWIM Wink

psychomum5 · 13/06/2006 21:52

namechange you do make sense and you also know your own limits. I hope all this has helped and am hoping that all goes well with your pregnancy:)

Original poster
Namechangedincaseimspotted · 13/06/2006 22:05

Thankyou. ANd thanks for the advice. Will show dh when we are at work tomorrow (just in case he thinks of making a fuss!) Grin

OP posts:
chocciekookee · 13/06/2006 22:35

My hubby had it done recently when our DD2 was 6wks old (our third child). When we first found out we were preggies with no3, hubby talked to dr about getting it done and he was initially told they wouldn't perform the op until the baby was 4mths old. However, when he went back to the drs after DD2 born to start the 'ball' rolling, and because it seemed to coincide with the end of the financial year for the NHS, within a week of going to the drs he had seen the consultant and the appointment was booked for the op!

It really is a quick op, and was performed at family planning clinic - my hubby said it didn't hurt at the time, just a sensation of 'pulling' (pardon the pun!). He was really drugged up though and slept for ages when he got home afterwards (the local anesthetic made him feel drunk!). Bruised and tender the next morning but regular painkillers and lots of rest for a couple of days (heaps of TLC!) and he was back to work after 3 days. Couldn't lift anything heavy for several days. And did have to wear 'tight' underwear for a few days after op.

Had to go back to the nurse 7-10days after op to get stitches out and provide samples 16wks and 20wks after the op.

All seems to work perfectly normal, everything seems the same in that department (iykwim) but there is no worry about getting pregnant! For peace of mind it really is the best thing if you're sure you don't want to be pregnant again.

Good luck!

brimfull · 13/06/2006 22:50

my dh had it done when ds was about a yr old.Had it done in gp surgery and he spent the rest of the day in bed but was up and about as usual after that.He has quite a physical job aswell.He did take good pain killers for a few days though.
He didn't need the stitches to be removed ,afaik they were dissolvable.
Did make sex life much better as worry was gone.
Hope your dp is encouraged by these comments and gets it done.Remember to keep the area really clean afterwards as an infection would be a real pain in the bollocks Smile

Tortington · 13/06/2006 23:20

quite a few years ago my husband ran to the hospital when i told him id had enough.

paper underpants

black - i mean black balls for 10 days - i swear it was a woman doctor Grin

he said it wasn't as bad as he expected.

sex is no different

dont tell them horror stories though becuase men are so precious over their balls they really are - the minute you say " custy says her dh had black balls for a week" they will say - right fuck that! am not going!

beansontoast · 13/06/2006 23:26

my sis said that she and her dh were advised to 'put it through its paces'Wink once a day following surgery for a fortnight....like she didnt have enough to do!

poppiesinaline · 13/06/2006 23:35

We marched off to the GP (not our normal GP) asking for DH to have the snip when DS2 (unexpected 3rd baby) was one week old. GP was fine, no problems, put DH on the waiting list which we were told would be 6 months. 3 months later he had the op. (Had a panic attack in the recovery room afterwards - the fact that the surgeon didnt use enough local anaesthetic and had to top it up probably didnt help but SHHHHH dont tell your DP/DH that bit!)

Our normal GP said afterwards that she was really shocked that DH had been even put on the waiting list. They apparently, dont normally agree to vasectomies until the baby is at least 9 months old - phew! glad we saw another GP is all I can say.

No fear of another baby - fab. Although, a mum down the school did mutter something about a friend of hers that her DH's vasectomy reversed itself 7 years later Shock >