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Original poster

DH has been suspended from work

42 replies

PeachyClair · 19/04/2006 00:04

He went in tonight, after yesterday phonng and asking that the new shift pattern (the fifth in 18 months) be reconsidered as we couldn't manage childcare. She (his boss) said OK, come in an hour early and we'll discuss it. Well, he told her that he had applied for flexible working arrangements as we have two kids under six as well as Sam. She flipped, 'we don't need to comply with no effing legislation you can F off I don't care if you have a life it's not my problem'

DH left the room, his line manager went ina and said look, they've got a really violent SN son, I've heard the phone calls, he's good and we don't want to lose him. She then threw him off site.

He's to phone Personnel tomorrow to find out wtf is going on.

She said they don't have to consider his flexible working as if they don't want him to do it they'll just write 'not good for buiness' in the letter,. I know they can't do that.

I'm angry (My Dh is a quiet soul who works hard and doesn't deserve this) and scared as his is our only real income.

We're off to CAb tomorrow the minute we've spoken to Personnel, but we have to take all 3 ds's as he can't face it without me (he is really shy) which'll be fun!.

I'm so angry with his employers. they're not a small company- one of the world's biggest- and they've already cost us a small fortune by making him work more, he commutes and we pay bridge tolls of £5a night. I just want him out of there now.

OP posts:
jampots · 19/04/2006 00:05

gosh sounds terrible peachyclair. Is he in a Union? If so do they offer 24 hours legal advice?

Original poster
PeachyClair · 19/04/2006 00:09

The two union reps were sacked on what Dh said is made up charges... they were given freebies to take home then accused of nicking them.

I HATE that place, really HATE it!

My DH is the nicest, kindest man I know- he shouldn't have to put up with this!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
PeachyClair · 19/04/2006 00:18

OK, I need ideas for jobs for a bright traffic co-ordinator who is also very IT literate (was a programmer but too long ago) and also is extremely electronically minded- he has his own little business repairing / selling DJ electronic equipment. he's good with numbers, people, phones, but quite shy and not the world's best speller. He can problem solve, negotiate, and do paperwork. his current contract is for a time crtical one, if you make a mistake you lose the whole deal.

And any ideas for interview skills for very shy people, please.

OP posts:
eidsvold · 19/04/2006 06:37

Not only would I contact anyone who can give you legal advice I would go to the press - how appalling is she......

then he should look for a job where people appreciate hard workers and do not have personal issues....

she sounds like a right charmer. I know you have said he is really shy but if you get your story out there someone might think - hey that is someone we would love to have working in our company.

sorry to hear she was so horrible. I know you are worrying about all of this.

Twiglett · 19/04/2006 07:05

yes yes .. go to press .. especially if world's biggest company

go to head office (with kids in tow and reporter) and demand to see head of personnel / chief executive

how dare they Angry

contact your house insurance and ask about them paying for a solicitor to take case

screw them

how about project management??

hub2dee · 19/04/2006 07:27

Maybe this is a dumb idea, but might it be sensible to involve some senior bods in other areas of this organisation ? Her behaviour does not sound like something this company would condone IYSWIM. Yes, perhaps there's an agenda / directive she is following, but perhaps not...

Radley · 19/04/2006 07:38

OMG, I cannot believe this woman, I haven't read the rest of the thread yet, but I'll put money on the fact that she has no children, or, that she has no idea how hard it is looking after a SN child.

I really do hope that you get this sorted.

Frizbe · 19/04/2006 07:42

This person sounds totally scarey and is well out of order, I hope you get this sorted soon, lots of great advice below though, don't go quietly and document every single conversation from here on it, dates times the lot.

Radley · 19/04/2006 07:43

Having read the other comments, I agree, go to the press, CAB and speak to a lawyer.

ALSO, your hubby sounds like he has got a good head on his shoulders and will have NO problem getting another job where he is valued more.

tigermoth · 19/04/2006 07:43

this sounds awful. From what you've said, this manager is blantantly flouting the law. Good luck with seeing the CAB today. I am sure they will be very interested in this. Good idea to see if your house insurance covers legal help as well.

Also, it could be a good idea to get something in writing from this woman, stating her reasons for refusing your dh's request and also company policy in flexible working. You can then show this to legal experts, the press, CAB or whoever. If I were you I'd get advice from the CAB on this today - and definitely get proper advice before writing anything yourself.

It might also help your dh if some of this confrontation is by letter as opposed to more face to face meetings, especially as he is shy. Also IME, once individuals in a company are asked to put something in writing, this means other managers in the company have to give it their approval, so this should work in your favour too.

LeahE · 19/04/2006 07:50

Don't go to the press before following it up intrernally. The last person I know suspended by a psycho manager in a big company found that once HR and senior management got involved it was the manager who was fired.

hub2dee · 19/04/2006 07:52

If nothing is offered in writing, I'd go asking for it in writing.

'Following our discussion on xday when you requested I immediately... please would you be so kind as to confirm in writing your instructions and outline the company's policy regarding...'

She'll flip, but will possibly be forced to erm 'modulate' her suggestions.

Finbar · 19/04/2006 07:56

get a copy of the company's Grievance Policy - you can raise one against this awful woman.
You mustn't be shy about it - i work in HR and I've seen plenty of these raised by employees who are being 'dealt' with for some other matter and it can work

ItalianJob · 19/04/2006 08:02

Make sure he writes a note of all that happened yesterday, and documents all further contact with the company. May be worth you phoning/e-mailing the Disability Rights Commission. Their web page is:
www.drc-gb.org/

Freckle · 19/04/2006 08:04

From what you have described, the company has failed to follow the statutory grievance procedure. If they do nothing to rectify this, they are in breach of statutory provisions and this would be automatic unfair dismissal. Any employment tribunal could award punitive damages because the company has denied your dh his statutory rights.

Do go to CAB and they will be able to give you a booklet outlining exactly what the company should have done and what your dh should do now.

Tortington · 19/04/2006 08:46

no advice but just wanted to add that i'm thinking of you all and hope your ok

GDG · 19/04/2006 08:50

Agree with all other comments. So sorry you are going through this PC. If the union reps at work are no good, what about an 'independent' union iyswim - not a work connected one. Dh is with Amicus. I'm not well up on these things - but there's some good advice here. So hope everything works out for you.

clerkKent · 19/04/2006 08:58

It looks like the manager is out of control and is utterly unaware of the law. I would expect Personnel to ofer soem sort of support, but it is unlikely the company will agree to flexitime. They have a duty to consider it, and they will go through the motions, but they will be able to find reasons to turn down your request (unless the line manager is overruled from above).

A bad story in the press can work wonders, but see how it goes with CAB and Personnel first.

Original poster
PeachyClair · 19/04/2006 10:29

He's nt exactly asking for flexititme: just the hours back he had before the other chap got given them for teenagers hogging the bathroom reasons.

He has phoned head office who are going to call his General Manager (being a night worker, Dh doesn't get to see much of him). he has also been asked to put a grievance in writing against her, which he will fax this afternnon after CAB- she is still on trial period so you neer know Wink.

I think she does have a few personal issues here: firstly, she leaves her own kids unatteneded at night (they are under 13 but that's all I know. As an ex Home-Start [erson, if I knew where she lived I'd have gone anopnymously to SS long ago) but after intervention from another manager, she has been forced to get childminders in so she cannot see that we are unable to with Sam. However, as social services said, Sam's behaviours are so unpredictable that he just isn't safe with pther kids. Also, she's in cmpetition for her own post atm so she's trying to put her stamp on the place.

this does happen every so often at this company, the industry tends to attract bossy prats. The individuals invariable dissapear eventually but this time it's directly affected the possibility of my degree being finished becuase of childcare. Without the degree income (albeit loand and grant) Dh can't actually afford to get to work anyhow, after bills! They're not exactly well paid.

Thanks guys for all the support. I can't believe this has happened.

OP posts:
Twiglett · 19/04/2006 18:05

anything happen today peachy?

edam · 19/04/2006 18:11

So sorry about this - makes my ex-boss look almost human. Shock Some really good advice here. Hope the CAB was helpful.

edam · 19/04/2006 18:16

I guess you were joking about interview tips but just in case this is helpful, given that he's shy, tell him to make eye contact, remember to breathe and that it's OK to pause before you answer a question.

Smile when they greet you and when you say good-bye. Oh and try to shadow the interviewer's gestures a bit - don't overdo it but if they have their arms on the table, copy them, for instance. It suggests you are on the same wavelength.

edam · 19/04/2006 18:16

I guess you were joking about interview tips but just in case this is helpful, given that he's shy, tell him to make eye contact, remember to breathe and that it's OK to pause before you answer a question.

Smile when they greet you and when you say good-bye. Oh and try to shadow the interviewer's gestures a bit - don't overdo it but if they have their arms on the table, copy them, for instance. It suggests you are on the same wavelength.

edam · 19/04/2006 18:18

oops!

Blu · 19/04/2006 18:18

How was his meeting with personnell??
So sorry about this, it sounds horrible. Can he get the bathroom-hogging colleague to verify that that is a reason HE got shift changes he asked for? He needs to put all this in writing for personnel.