Another wedding invitation dilemma

[ponygirl]

My brother has just rung to give me the details of his wedding plans. They have decided to have a very small wedding ceremony to be followed later in the year by two big parties for family and friends (both families are quite large and quite spread out). To the wedding they are only inviting parents and siblings. No children apart from their own (understood) but no husbands of siblings. Is this really rude?

My dh and I have been married for 9 years, my db and SIL (to be) came to our wedding and yet my dh is being excluded from theirs (as are my SIL's sisters' husbands). Dh is offended and upset and I feel the same on his behalf. I know that dh would rather I didn't go, but this is my brother and he's the only full sibling I have.

Am I over-reacting?

Oh Blu, you are good! That's a great idea!
My mum gave me some money so that she could invite our creepy second cousins to my wedding reception, and some more so that her best friend could come on the day. I accepted as we were short of cash and I didn't particularly want those people there so was darned if I was going to pay for them!

Gosh, has my thread been trolled? That's a first. Does that mean I have finally arrived?!

Thanks, Blu. I'll see how the land lies in a few days. I agree that it's more a case of my brother handling it badly rather than intending to cause offence, but OTOH I can see why dh is offended. He was so bullish about 'doing what they want to do' that it might be difficult to change things. I'll probably talk to my mum: she has more influence with both of us than we have with each other!