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Original poster

Really bloody annoyed!!

68 replies

alexsmum · 16/03/2006 16:10

Just been to pick ds1 up from school(he's 6)only to be met by his teacher with ds's underpants in a plastic bag.
Apparently he had asked to go to the loo and her'policy' is to say no, and if they really want to go they will ask again! of course dh,couldn't hold on and wet himself!Is it just me or is this f outrageous!!!!!??????
To add insult to injury, as there were no school trousers for him to borrow while his dried,he had to wear his p.e shorts and everyone laughed at him.Sad
I am really upset and angry about this.Could she not have phoned me to go and pick him up or at least take him a pair of trousers in?
When push comes to shove, could she have not let him go to the toilet when he asked?

OP posts:
Original poster
alexsmum · 17/03/2006 10:05

ok have been to speak to the headmistress this morning and she was great about it.she said her view is that if they need to go,they should be allowed to go straight away.she is going to talk to his teacher and to all the teachers to ensure this never happens again.
and she said she'll get back to me by the end of the day, to let me know what she has done/said.

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DaddyCool · 17/03/2006 10:08

this would make me so angry. some teachers are just plain weird. we all remember them. the majority are fine but some are on a completely different planet.

disrupts lessons. FFS. they are 6. they eat glue and pick their nose. surely a toilet break won't hinder their chances of competing in a global economy lol.

Original poster
alexsmum · 17/03/2006 10:12

i know dc-what a crock.
the headmistress did say ' some ks2 children do use it as a diversionary tactic when a particular lesson is being taught' and were like' he's ks1 so that means nothing'

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Original poster
alexsmum · 17/03/2006 10:13

i know dc-what a crock.
the headmistress did say ' some ks2 children do use it as a diversionary tactic when a particular lesson is being taught' and were like' he's ks1 so that means nothing'

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Original poster
alexsmum · 17/03/2006 10:13

oops

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Angeliz · 17/03/2006 10:19

Oh so Angry for you!
Your poor ds.
My dd had a few accidents when she started reception but i quizzed both her and the teacher and it was just that she didn't ask to go. She hasn't done it for ages (and never does it at home-that's what worried me) but i think it was just shyness in asking at first.
I would have been LIVID if she was deneid it. FFS some people think kids are little robots. I bet none of the staff have to ask twice and as someone else said, he's 6! How much disruption can a wee cause???

BITCH! (the Teacher not you Smile )

joelalie · 17/03/2006 10:36

Poor little lad. That is truly awful. Totally inappropriate for a child of that age and teaching all the wrong lessons.

However I don't agree with all those who suggest going in all guns blazing. She has said sorry. Teacher's make mistakes and obviously it's a policy that has worked up till now, even if it's wrong-headed. I know with my children that they can use the toilet as a displacement activity ....anything to avoid having to eat dinner/ do homework/ get dressed. Maybe she has had a lot of problems with this in the past. Not excusing her but possibly explaining what seems inexplicable.

And most importantly you risk totally destroying any relationship that you have with the teacher, to the detriment of your son and his education this year. Perhaps a quiet word or a letter to her explaining the situation and asking her to genuinely apologise to DS would be best, so that he knows she is really sorry (and if she's a decent teacher she will be) and that she won't do it again. The only thing that matter is that YOUR son feels happy and confident in school.

Original poster
alexsmum · 17/03/2006 10:45

joealie, thanks for your post.i would never go in all guns blazing in any situation-it's just not me.However, i don't know if you read my post of this morning that said ths dh and i went and had a chat with the headteacher about this, because we are really unhappy about it.

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littlemisspiggy · 17/03/2006 10:56

Stuuuuupid woman! FGS the child is 6!!

I do hope your little boy has not been too traumatised by the episode. How is he today?

spacecadet · 17/03/2006 11:04

alexsmum-thats good, hopefully it wont happen again, to any child.

aelita · 17/03/2006 11:25

Bloody hell, I thought attitudes like this were dead and buried. I can't believe that this kind of thing can still be a school policy! I hope your talk with the head has a positive effect.

joelalie · 17/03/2006 12:20

Oops..sorry didn't read all the posts.

Hope it has some effect. How is your DS this morning?

jmum6 · 17/03/2006 13:02

Alexsmum glad you got it sorted with the head. Do you feel happier now?

Original poster
alexsmum · 17/03/2006 14:06

mmm- i guess i feel glad i spoke to her.i'm dreading going to pick him up this afternoon though!
he's fine,he's gone to school quite happily today so no lasting damage done.

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Aero · 17/03/2006 14:24

Just seen this and tbh, I'd be fuming if it happened to dd - she suffers from UTI's and could not possibly hold on for the loo! Yesterday she came home with wet pants and tights which had happened at lunchtime! I had a thread about this last night \link{http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=1375&threadid=156007&stamp=060316234030\here}. I was annoyed, but am pretty sure it was just that no-one had noticed. Will be speaking with her teacher this afternoon as I didn't have a chance this morning.

What you describe though is outrageous. Afaik this doesn't happen at dd's school and they wear a wristband if they go to the loo between breaks to let staff know what they're doing out of class which is perfectly sensible. Having to ask twice is plain ridiculous and children should net be subjected to feeling embarrassed like this. This teacher is sending out the wrong message about the meaning of the word 'no'. "If I say 'no', I really mean if you ask again I'll say yes"????? Barking!

Original poster
alexsmum · 17/03/2006 17:06

i saw your thread aero and felt so sorry for your little girl-being uncomfortable all afternoon.
The head phoned me this afternoon to tell me she had spoken with his teacher and told her how upset we were, and tht he is to be allowed to go straight away.
all well and good but what about the other children in the class?

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jmum6 · 17/03/2006 17:34

Teacher will prob let them all go now cus she'll think you will have talked to other mums. She'll b on her best behaviour from now on!!

Aero · 17/03/2006 18:48

I managed to have a word with the TA this afternoon (who wasn't there yesterday) and asked her to have a quiet word with dd next week about not being afraid to tell someone if the same should happen again, sao I'm happy enough with that.
Glad you got sorted too.

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