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Original poster

GIVE THE GIFT OF LIFE..........

92 replies

misdee · 27/02/2006 22:39

\link{http://www.uktransplant.org.uk/ukt/how_to_become_a_donor/how_to_become_a_donor.jsp\organ donation}

would like to thank mummygows friend for agreeing to donate some of her late dh organs, somewhere out there tonight, people will be making their way to hospitals to get ready for transplants. i wish them all the best and mummygows friend and family are in my thoughts and prayers tonight. xx

OP posts:
wannaBe1974 · 28/02/2006 16:30

what I totally disagree with though is that if your next of kin don't agree with organ donation, they can override your wishes, surely if you register as a doner then that is your choice and your family shouldn't even be asked if it's what they want?

hunkermunker · 28/02/2006 16:30

Agree again WB!

My next of kin know I'll haunt them if they refuse to donate my organs though...

HRHQueenOfQuotes · 28/02/2006 16:34

wb - I agree with your last post. I would strongly oppose an opt-out system of any kind - there's simply no way of guaranteeing that all 60 million people in the UK knew and understood that they had to opt-out, and how to do it if they wanted to. I also don't feel that if you opted out you should be taken out of the 'running' for a donor organ.......I'm sure that not all of those people who've had organ donations in recent years were on the register themselves - well I'd be suprised if they were.

I do however think it's completely ridiculous that a family member can override the person's wishes and refuse to let the organs be donated.

Original poster
misdee · 28/02/2006 16:34

they have to ask tho. its all about respecting the families wishes, tho i also think they family should respect the poor dead persons wishes if they have registered.

OP posts:
Original poster
misdee · 28/02/2006 16:35

even if an opt-out system was in place the final decision would always be with the deceased persons family.

OP posts:
HRHQueenOfQuotes · 28/02/2006 16:39

so even with an opt-out system they probably wouldn't get many more donations than they do know would they??? Because those family members who say "no" now, would say "no" then too Confused.

I think that should be changed. Perhaps they should think of making a person's entry onto the donor register a 'legal' thing (like a will) whereby once they had put their name on, it was there, and their organs could be used.

Original poster
misdee · 28/02/2006 16:42

i dunno QofQ. i honestly dont.

but it still doesnt change the fact that each year people are dying because they need transplant. There is a seriosu shortage of organs, and the only to increase the chance of organs being donated is for people to sign the register. The only chance i have of getting my husband home with his family is for someone to sign the register. We are just a statistic to most people, but its very real to us. 5years ago i wouldnt have thought much of organ donation, and now its rules my life.

OP posts:
wannaBe1974 · 28/02/2006 16:43

I've also registered now :)

HRH there's a vast difference between having people who aren't on the register because they just didn't get round to registering, and someone who hadn't opted out. If someone feels strongly enough that they wouldn't want their organs donated, they would opt out if such a system existed, and if such a system was implemented then it would be widely advertised. It's easy to just not register because you don't expect to die tomorrow or next week or next year, and generally people don't register because they kinda think they don't care if their organs are donated or not, but if you feel strongly enough to say that you absolutely wouldn't want your organs donated, then you would make a conscious effort to opt out if you knew that by not opting out you would have no say in the event of your untimely death.

HRHQueenOfQuotes · 28/02/2006 16:45

do people have to sign the register to donate - if the family has the final say.

For eg if my DH hadn't signed (he has so this is purely theoretical) but I knew he wanted to donate his organs - would they ask me and use them (after I'd said yes) regardless of whether he'd signed or not??

wannaBe1974 · 28/02/2006 16:45

And yes I agree, I think that by signing up to the register it should be a legal thing like a will where your family have no say. agree with hunker, I'll come back and haunt my family if thei didn't respect my wishes, but I know my DH would have my organs donated anyway.

wannaBe1974 · 28/02/2006 16:47

Yes hrh they would, if your DH wasn't on the register and he died then they would discuss it with you and would ask if you and your DH had discussed organ donation, if you knew his wishes then you could sign consent for his organs to be donated, if you didn't know his wishes then you could decide whether you wanted his organs donated or not.

Original poster
misdee · 28/02/2006 16:47

i think they do QofQ, tho obviosuly its easier to ask if you have signed.

OP posts:
HRHQueenOfQuotes · 28/02/2006 16:47

"If someone feels strongly enough that they wouldn't want their organs donated, they would opt out if such a system existed, and if such a system was implemented then it would be widely advertised."

I'm sorry but I strongly disagree with that statement. You think of the "Simple" things which are widely advertised, and yet some people don't understand that they have to do something.

My DH is a TV Licence Officer, and then number of people he visits, they say they've seen the adverts, and read the letters that were sent to them, but some of them still didn't realise they HAD to get a TV Licence. (obviously there are some p*sstakers too - but a substantial number who don't know - and these are people who speak English and watch TV). The foreigners usually haven't got a clue about it.

PeachyClair · 28/02/2006 16:49

Misdee thanks for strating that one.

Last weekend was first anniversary of cousin's death, my aunt (his grandmother) in a right state at the moment. Sad Sad. His parents marriage collapsed with his illnesses severity, and his little brothers and sisters miss him dreadfully. His small sister never even got to mett him. Sad.

From what we had learned the main reason for delaying the op repeatedly was that the lack of donors. That's why they were doing the maintenance ops instead, and why he was weak enough to contract MRSA.

Needless to say, I'm hugely in favour of opt out and am registered myself. I looked into bone marrow donation as well, but am not eligible due to scar tissue on my lower back. Sad about that.

Original poster
misdee · 28/02/2006 16:49

QofQ, the last thread about this, you got rather het up if i remember. I am trying to raise awarness of organ donation.

OP posts:
HRHQueenOfQuotes · 28/02/2006 16:50

so the current register is a bit of a joke isn't it Shock

Someone signed up to the register could have their organs wasted because the family says no.

While someone not signed up could have their organs used because the family said yes.

How bizarre

PeachyClair · 28/02/2006 16:50

Oh for those who don't know, he had been six for two weeks, all spent in a coma.

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 28/02/2006 16:51

DH and I are both registered and I can see the pro's and cons of having an opt out system.

I do think though when it comes to it (when someone you love has died) whatever there wishes were it must be so hard to seperate the emotional side of it (I dont want them taking bits of xxx away) from the logical side (they have passed on and dont need them anymore) I have huge amounts of respect for families that consent to organ donation.

desperateSCOUSEwife · 28/02/2006 16:51

agree that signing the register should be legal thing and should stand as just with the person who has consented
but there should be ALL the information available to people (and there families)who want to donate before registering and what it exactly entails

PeachyClair · 28/02/2006 16:52

Yes the new register is a complete joke, but it's all we have at the mo unfortunately. And I do think if your partner or child ahs just passes away and they are on the list through their own choice, it must at least inform your decision at a time where you maybe cannot think straight for yourself.

wannaBe1974 · 28/02/2006 16:52

Yes but it's domething that families should discuss, if you sign up to the register then really you should tell your family about it.

Misdee can I ask, and of course you don't have to answer if you're not comfortable doing so, but how much longer can Peter wait for a transplant?

HRHQueenOfQuotes · 28/02/2006 16:55

Well obviously you should tell your family - but it makes me Angry that they could then go against your wishes depiste having signed.

Please people that are signing up - make sure you tell your family what your wishes are. It's all very easy to sign-up online - and not tell them (I signed up when I first read about Peter months back but it was about 3am in the morning and I forgot to tell DH until just before Christmas Blush).

prettybird · 28/02/2006 17:01

I'm on the register - and dh knows I want my organs used. Unfortunately, he has told me that he doesn't want his organs used - like Pacaonofan, he has a fear of hos organs being "harvested" while he is till warm. So I ouwld have to respect his wishes.

HRHQoQ - if Zimbabwe has any malarial zones, then they won't taek your blood for a year after you visit anyway. I get caught by that by going to South Africa. If I hadn't actaully been to one of the malarial areas, then I might just not mention it - but in truth, every time we go, we go the Kruger, which now has a mlarail risk all year round.

SO even without your needle phobia, they wouldn't want you anyway! Grin

fastasleep · 28/02/2006 17:04

After reading an early thread about misdee and her hubby I put all my family (4 month old included) on the register, for everything. I can't see any logical reason why not to.

PeachyClair · 28/02/2006 17:07

Dh was really wary and thought it weird to put himself on, but has devolved decision making to me. He knows full well that means donation, just his way of avoiding iyswim. He's on the register now too.