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Original poster

I have been Very Naughty - someone please slap my wrists for me [blush]

33 replies

TambaTheInnocentPrincess · 27/01/2006 13:14

I have done some thing really bad.

As some of you know I have been feeling broody lately, Dh hasnt... He is concerned about finances etc, He doesnt want to try for another baby but not to the point where he would be miserable if we had an accident iyswim.

Anyway

Last night we were in bed, and I had the comdon in my hand. I opened it and my nail caught it and it tore a little at the top (well I wasnt sure it had but thought it may have - it was dark)

And then the naughty bit... I didnt tell him. I just let him carry on.

Afterwards, I was worried that it had ripped etc and feeling very guilty if it had of done (I have no right to make dh think we are being careful when infact we wernt. It is deceptive and not the sort of thing I would normally do.)

So I ran it under the tap to check... and it did have a hole in it.

I feel very guilty now. Im at myself.

OP posts:
Enid · 27/01/2006 13:16

naughty naughty

Next · 27/01/2006 13:16

Its done now and hey - accidents happen!! Just don't let on about it.

Or

Get down the chemists.

Freckle · 27/01/2006 13:17

Can you not tell him? Not that it was deliberate, but that you had the impression that the condom hadn't stopped his "full flow" and, when you checked, there was a hole in the end. That way, if you are pregnant, he will have had time to come to terms with the possibility.

bossykate · 27/01/2006 13:17

i suggest you get the morning after pill. you have 72 hrs after intercourse.

Mascaraohara · 27/01/2006 13:19

I think if you tell him you checked it, he would wonder why (I would anyway). I would get the Morning After Pill to be sure you are not.

What would his reaction be if you were to get pregnant?

VeniVidiVickiQV · 27/01/2006 13:20

Tamba - how many times have you done this now? (Didnt you tell your DH that you couldnt get pregnant a few days after your af or something a week or so ago?)

Dont condoms also have a spermicide in them?

WideWebWitch · 27/01/2006 13:22

You don't need your wrists slapped imo, you need to talk to your husband properly and honestly about what you both want and AGREE to something on it.

WideWebWitch · 27/01/2006 13:22

You don't need your wrists slapped imo, you need to talk to your husband properly and honestly about what you both want and AGREE to something on it.

WideWebWitch · 27/01/2006 13:22

You don't need your wrists slapped imo, you need to talk to your husband properly and honestly about what you both want and AGREE to something on it.

WideWebWitch · 27/01/2006 13:23

You don't need your wrists slapped imo, you need to talk to your husband properly and honestly about what you both want and AGREE to something on it.

WideWebWitch · 27/01/2006 13:23

You don't need your wrists slapped imo, you need to talk to your husband properly and honestly about what you both want and AGREE to something on it.

WideWebWitch · 27/01/2006 13:23

Sorry, laptop going slow so I kept clicking thinking it hadn't posted! Oops.

WigWamBam · 27/01/2006 13:24

Don't set out to get pregnant without talking to him about it, marriages have been broken up that way.

Get some emergency contraception then sit down with DH for another chat. It's not something to do without him being OK with it.

Original poster
TambaTheInnocentPrincess · 27/01/2006 13:24

Yes I did QV (but i thought that was true!)

It would have been day 12/13 of my cycle.

I ought to go and get the morning after pill but part of me doesnt want too.

I have told dh before 'oh shit i think that leaked' and he has said that it couldnt be helped. (Thise times it hadnt leaked though)

He wouldnt be mad if I got pregnant - he would be mad though, If i lied to get myself pregnant. So there is no way I am going to tell him now what happened last night.

OP posts:
bossykate · 27/01/2006 13:26

"he would be mad though, If i lied to get myself pregnant. So there is no way I am going to tell him now what happened last night."

oh what a tangled web we weave... get the pill and then sit down and talk to him properly as others have suggested.

Next · 27/01/2006 13:32

I think it is too late for Tamba to tell him now.

You say this happened last night, so get him in bed later, do the deed (its not like men ever need persuading) and say to him 'oh no it split'.

See what his reaction is and if necessary, you are still within the time limit for the morning after pill.

No need for him to know then and you haven't lied really either. Everyones a winner.

shimmy21 · 27/01/2006 13:33

let's face it the chances you are pg are small so least said soonest mended in this case if you are not pg

On the other hand if you are pg I think you secretly quite badly want this baby (or these 'accidents' wouldn't keep happening) so perhaps the morning after pill is not a good idea in your case.

I'd go with wait and see. If you are pg you will have to fess up to dh or make a believable explanation (sometimes these things do happen because condoms are not 100% effective.) and he will have to come to terms with the idea (which many many men do). Good luck!

Original poster
TambaTheInnocentPrincess · 27/01/2006 13:33

Doesnt it cost 25 quid for the morning after pill though???

Am if a condom has spermacide in it wouldnt that drastically reduce the chances of getting pregnant?

And its taken my up to a year with both ds's to concieve (although thats when i was having one AF a year - i have been regular for 6 months now)

gosh - I am full of excuses

OP posts:
LadySherlockofLGJ · 27/01/2006 13:34

Tamba MSN please..............

Original poster
TambaTheInnocentPrincess · 27/01/2006 13:34

He would be pleased but worried if I got pregnant. He wouldnt hate the idea etc he just worries about money.

He has asked me to go on the pill as its annoying having to use condoms but i dont think i could trust myself to take it properly.

OP posts:
WigWamBam · 27/01/2006 13:34

Even if it costs £25 for the morning-after pill, that's a damned sight less than a baby would cost!!

If you see the GP for a prescription, surely that wouldn't cost £25, though?

Original poster
TambaTheInnocentPrincess · 27/01/2006 13:45

Im not supposed to take the morning after pill (or hormonal contraception for that matter) but as Id been having regualr periods for 6 months they are considering letting me take the pill

OP posts:
starlover · 27/01/2006 13:47

stop with the excuses already!

you have the following choices:

  1. get the morning after pill
  2. tell your dh NOW, and see what he says
  3. hope to god you aren't pregnant (and deal with the consequences if you are)

now stop fannying around and decide what you're going to do

misdee · 27/01/2006 13:53

tell your dh now!!

wheresmyfroggy · 27/01/2006 14:02

I think you should tell him.