I wish I knew how to do things

[compo]

I wish I wasn't such a girl and relied on dh to do things
For example I've just taken down the Chrsitmas decorations but I don't know how to open the loft so have to wait for dh to get up to put them away. Other things I can't do are: extend the dining room table and put it back after it's been extended, empty the hoover , put the photos from the digital camera onto the PC and then onto a disk in order to get them developed... probably will think of loads more pathetic things I can't do...

There are certain things I can't do and I'm on my own. I just have to wait for a male friend or relative to come round and get them to do it. It's a PITA.

As Im on my own, I do most things myself and if I cant, I ask someone to SHOW me for next time.

Im trying to teach both my children that you can do anything if you put your mind to it, and if you cant, then ask someone to show you.

having said that, Im more than happy to stand back and let a man "help" me - why have a dog and bark yourself

Just chill out and be glad you don't have to do them! Another single mum here, who does absolutely everything. I wired in my cooker & plumbed in the dishwasher. If there is an instruction manual, then it can be done!!
I honestly can't remember the last time a man did anything for me, unless he was being paid (sure there is a naughty joke there somehere). If there is a big construction job to be done, then I call 0800handyman and pay for a few hours of a qualified DIYers time. No whinging or moaning or debate - it just gets done!

Just chill out and be glad you don't have to do them! Another single mum here, who does absolutely everything. I wired in my cooker & plumbed in the dishwasher. If there is an instruction manual, then it can be done!!
I honestly can't remember the last time a man did anything for me, unless he was being paid (sure there is a naughty joke there somehere). If there is a big construction job to be done, then I call 0800handyman and pay for a few hours of a qualified DIYers time. No whinging or moaning or debate - it just gets done!

No, that's not true. I know exactly how to put a shelf up in theory, but in practice, I am not strong or tall enough to do jobs which require height and strength to do them effectively. If I could, I'd do them. I'd much rather be able to get on with it than rely on someone doing me a favour.

Also, with some jobs I could do them, but it would take 4 hours and look crap, while a male friend could do it in 45 minutes and it would look good.

perhaps its about how women view themselves. My mum has that attitude too ie I could do it but a man could do it quicker and better.
If you arent tall enough then use a step ladder.

Do you honestly believe men are inately better at doing "manly" jobs than women - strength aside?

No, but I know that I'm not good at doing them, and I get intensely cross when I'm told I should be doing something I know I can't do and I would like to be able to do.

I have no vested interest at all in being helpless and dependent. I'd much rather not be.

My husband is fab at looking after kids. But I do everything else. And I do mean everything. I put up shelves, do all the paperwork, even fitted a new toilet seat!, etc. You can do it! It's not hard! Writing code is hard, learning a software app isnt.

Start w/something small to build your confidence. Like learning to upload photos from the camera. That's a good place to star.

Just looking at the car seat discussion at the moment, and this is another bugbear of mine. I live in perpetual fear of my car seats being moved out of the car, because I cannot put them back safely - they move around and I'm never sure I've done it correctly. Of course I'm going to get someone bigger and stronger to do it - but I wish I didn't have to. I would like them to be made so that people who don't have a very high level of strength would also be able to fit them safely.

But you dont need strength to put in a car seat. You need to take the instructions out and practise. My mum who is 67 is able to do it in her car!

Uploading photos doesn't take physical strength. It's just a question of reading instructions and following them. That's easy.

Using a step ladder is useless if you need to be able to stretch a certain width which you can't do, because your body doesn't go that far. And if you try and overstretch on a step ladder, it's dangerous.

I went into the loft to get down the Christmas decorations - ended up with my foot through the spare bedroom ceiling! A lot to be said for letting DH do this (and then get the blame )

But I'm never sure that they're fitted properly - mine move around a bit - are they supposed to?

You can push them into the seat but shouldnt be able to pull forward or push directly sideways ie I dont mean into the seat but to move sideways.

That's what I can't do. And i've practiced loads. I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

But generally when I ask someone bigger and stronger to do it for me, they manage to get it so that it doesn't push sideways, frontways etc. and it's safer.

I hate carseats

Don't let them be your nemesis, Caligula! Back when I was climbing, I used to hate particular types of rock. So I'd force myself to go on them. My weakness became my strength!

Embrace the car seat!

the local firestation usually run "check your car seats are fitted properly for free" near us

might be worth looking out for something similar

think Tescos do too but may be larger stores

'Embrace the car seat' Lol I hate them too and was tempted to set fire to them and dance around madly laughing when we finally got rid of them.

I can't get pictures off the camera onto the pc either. I can get into the loft but very nearly fell out of it the other day trying to sort out Christmas presents. What a way to go, eh?!

Ooh, what a brilliant tip. I have a firestation up the road from me.

Can I just clarify, he thinks he is exempt. In our house it is me who does the plumbing, goes in the loft, puts together flatpack, fit car seats, changes plugs etc. DH can do the domestic stuff too, when he was off work for 6 weeks he got quite good, to the point where I thought if I could get a job earning enough he could stay at home. The thing is he is never at home long enough to do much domestic or DIY stuff and when he is away for weeks at a time i have to be pretty self sufficiant.

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My DP asked me how to write a cheque last week. He's 39, and has never written one before - didn't even have a bank account 'til he was 30.

This is a great thread.

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